The Girl Who Ate Everything

It's a real question. This cake. This one right here *points* -- why is this so deliciously moist and spongey and light? I didn't know what to expect so I just tore a piece off and popped it in my mouth, which was then filled with spongey delicious moist-ness. Oh, what am I eating? It's one of thsoe sponge cakes that every Chinatown bakery has; it's kind of like a misshapen cone. I thought I had one before but wasn't sure. It tastes eggy and...er, delicious, if I failed to mention that. 50 cents of yuuum.

I've been fooding way too much lately. I'm wondering when I'll break down...*looks at watch*. Not tonight, I suppose.

sandwich with eel and veggies and stuff

I did make a sandwich despite that I should never buy a loaf of bread. I ate half of the loaf in one day. But it's still unfinished today, so that's a good sign. I wanted veggies and eel, so that's what my sandwich consists of. I don't know the name of the vegetable but it costed $2.40/pound, if that makes it any more identifiable, ad after steaming it I mixed it with Sriracha sauce and extra virgin olive oil (for some good fat, I suppose). I got a can of roast eel chili for a buck and slapped some of that on top. Yes, SLAPPED! THWOK! Or placed--whatever.

mini chocolate croissant

Cute, eh? I hadn't had a croissant in ages so I got this little one from Ceci-Cela. NUMMY! Would've been nicer if it had been freshly baked and the chocolate was melty but I wasn't expecting that. Oh, but before the mini croissant I had...

French toasting

French toast from Khondoker Luncheonette. Quite yummy if I'm in the mood for French toast. Then again, it's pretty easy to make so I should probably just make it myself is I so desire. But if I make it I'll probably skip the egg part and just shove the bread into that whole in my head that lets me inhale oxygen/oranges/food.

I smell something sweet, like icing. Where is it coming from? I look up, peer around the room and maybe 30 feet away from me I see a guy eating...something. Is that what I'm smelling? I actually thought I had gone insane at first; if people can mistakenly see things, surely they can mistakenly smell things? I haven't figured out what the guy is eating but I'm assuming that's what I'm smelling. Considering that there are five people in this spacious lounge besides me, I guess it's not surprising that the smell wafted its way over here. Is my smell better than most or do I underestimate its power? I think I underestimate it.

This morning when I tried on my pants (the ones that tell me whether or not I've gotten too fat), they told me that I had gotten too fat. Of course, I've been eating like a starving pig (or worse than a normal, healthy pig) for the past week. Or two. Of course it was bound to come back at me and chop my head off with a meat cleaver. Of course I'd regret it--I should've known that beforehand. But then why didn't I stop it? Why did I consume all those sweets, all those pastries, all those slices of bread? The best way to prevent something from happening is to stifle its materialization in the first place. For whatever reason I was...

...oh my god. I smell something else. However, it's not a hunger inducing smell; it smells like something spicy. It's coming from the same distance, from the friend of the guy eating the sweet pastry.

Smells are intoxicating. I know they're not single layered, but when you eat something, besides the taste you also have factors like texture, temperature, and water content. Smells consist of many "flavors" but you don't have structural factors to think about. Smells. (sniff) I have no idea what this food is. (sniff) Chicken? Kind of smells like chicken. I'd rather have a cookie right about now...

Wow, I'm so distracted, this is ridiculous. I'm in the Kimmel Center now and my plan is to stay here until I finish most of my essay that's due on Monday. So far I've been working on other things, like my other essay that's due on Monday. I'll probably work on a different essay which, I kid you not, the topic of is "What does food mean to me?" I'm going to have a field day with that one, except I'm limited to 500 words when I could easily write thousands.

So, the fat pants told me I was fat. What did I do after that? I ate an orange and finished my loaf of bread that I bought on Thursday. Today is Saturday and from the actuall hours I was in possession of that bread, I finished the loaf of 13 slices in less than 48 hours. I had three slices left for my lunch, which I thoroughly enjoyed eating plain out of the bag in all its fluffy and soft goodness. I told you that i like bread too much, which is why I never buy it, but I did in order to make a sammich. I had my sammich, I suppose that's enough.

No more loaves of bread. I guess bread is the staff of life, unless you're me, in which case its the key to weight gain and feeling like a glutton.

I didn't bring my wallet with me in fear of buying something. Well, not so much fear as in the knowledge that I would DEFINITELY buy something if I had money. The only way to prevent that? No money! Wow, that was easy. It's not like I'd get hungry enough to steal food, although in the past it has made me go slightly insane. Slightly. I figure I can last another 24 hours without wheat or rice seeing as I don't have any in my kitchen anyway.

I was planning to go to the Taiwanese Night Market my school is having but my main reason to go was for the food. Now I'd rather not go. It's in a week but if I still feel as fat by then, I won't go. Lovely. Tonight my friend is appearing in a fashion show fundraiser being held in NYU but I don't feel like going to that as I'm worried about my essay, I brought no money, and she said there'd be food. "There will be Thai food, buffet style!" While that would've been a welcome invitation on any other day, today just...isn't that day.

It's funny I'm in this "God dammit I can't eat anything" mood since last night I was planning out my eating schedule, as in what to try out and when to do it. I wanted to try Yoghurt Palace II on Sullivan Street but the weather is such crap today that I don't want to walk down there (especially with a laptop in tow). Since I didn't walk here, I don't think I can afford to indulge in too much food, or any food (I was planning to buy a cookie also). I don't know if I'll walk back to my dorm but I really could afford to burn 100 calories.

I hate food sometimes. It's the worst thing to fixate on because it's one thing that the whole world shares. Not everyone drinks, not everyone smokes, not everyone reads, not everyone goes to concerts, but a hell of a lot of people eat. I wouldn't be so annoyed if I came from a family of overweight people but I don't, which makes me different from Wendy Shanker. It seems that her genes have developed to hold lots of fat and I'd like to believe mine haven't. Overall, Chinese people (and other Asians) aren't known for being fat. I don't want to be the odd one out. And if you don't think I'm fat, it's all about what photos of me you've seen. Some photos of me look surprisingly normal while others (like the ones my dad just sent me) make me look incredibly fat. I don't get it; maybe I morph on a daily basis.

Good lord, I hit three bakeries today (Something Sweet, Golden Fung Wong Bakery, and Lung Moon) buying four pastries in the process. GOD OH GOD WHY! Here's the food expenditure for the day:

• black and white cookie from Something Sweet: $1.25
• "everything" bagel from Ess-A-Bagel: $0.70
• 4 navel oranges from one of those Mott St markets: $1.00
• walnut honey cake from Lung Moon Bakery: $0.60
• 8 boiled vegetable dumplings from Tasty Dumpling: $2.00
• sesame cookie from Golden Fung Wong Bakery: $0.60
• chocolate cupcake from Golden Fung Wong Bakery: $0.75

This equates to $6.90 of TOO MUCH FOOD, ARR!! So what do I actually have in my kitchen right now? 3 navel oranges and 2 persimmons. See why I can't actually buy food? BECAUSE I EAT TOO MUCH!

My roommate baked a cake. I'm extremely glad that I wasn't in the dorm to witness that. I walked from my dorm to Ess-A-Bagel, the farthest point in my food itinerary. Supposing that it's about 2.5 miles away, I walked at least 5 miles today. Which is okay, but not good enough. Maybe I should go to Ess-A-Bagel EVERY DAY. Oh, and I'll actually try my bagel with something on it at some point but the bagels themselves are pretty filling. Bagels are delicious. I'll have to describe them more later.

Today I woke up with the most incredibly feeling of fatness. Well, it was after I woke up and went to the bathroom, but I knew I've been eating too much lately and you know what terrible things happen when you overeat? THE SKY FALLS IN AND YOUR FAMILY TURNS INTO GIANT FROGS and GOD HATES YOU, YES YOU.

Just kidding! I think. I ate a too large breakfast/lunch consisting of oranges and some foods I shouldn't talk about because they weren't mine (ultimate guilt-inducer). And at some point I realized that delicious sweet pastries were driving me nuts. Gotta cut them out for just a while. I mean, I ate FOUR PASTRIES yesterday! Insane!

However, if pastries were out of the picture, something else had to come in. Remember my predicament with buying loaves of bread? Well, I craved a loaf of bread. All day (seriously, ALL DAY in school) I kept thinking about a lovely European style loaf of bread (not a brick-shaped loaf) while at the same time thinking about how I shouldn't buy a loaf of bread beacuse I WILL EAT THE WHOLE THING.

And this went on for hours. Thank god I only had two classes. I really don't know what happened in my second class besides that the teacher was telling us Renaissance-era jokes and it was amusing. My teacher is cool, but I'm not interested in the class's subject. That would make it...ENJOYABLE.

After that class, which got out at 4:40 PM, I walked back to my dorm (wallet-less to prevent impulse buys) and stopped into some shops in Little Italy on the way. I don't do much food shopping in Little Italy seeing as most of it is restaurants (not that Chinatown isn't mainly restaurants and non-food related shops but there are also loads of produce stands) but I went to Italian Food Center on Grand Street to check out the breads (tomorrow I want to try Sullivan Street Bakery). And they had bread. And I had no wallet. So I continued to my dorm, got my wallet, took off my tights and pea coat because the weather was warm and went back out in the nice breeze and sunshine to get me some BREAD.

And I did. I got a sicilian twist loaf for $2.25 and went on my merry way to find fruit. Mott Street was as densely packed as Disney World in August so I continued on my merry way down to Mulberry and Canal where a cart was selling lots of yummy Chinese food for a dollar. Good lord, a DOLLAR. I had to get something, in this case vegetable mei fun (very thin rice noodles; delicious). I looked around some more for fruit but couldn't find anything cheap enough (god, why am I so cheap?) so I went to East Broadway, where I got 8 navel oranges for $2. Yes, I shop around.

I got back to my dorm to eat almost two hours after my class ended. !! Not that I spent ALL that time walking; I browsed a bit, took a short breather in my room beforehand, talked to my mum to ask her how bad it would be if I ate a loaf of bread (pretty bad), but overall I walked to and from school along with walking to and from Italian Food Center. At least five miles?

It's a little scary that I'll spend so much time walking for the sake of food, in this case a loaf of bread. I hadn't planned on getting the oranges and definitely not the mei fun. It was a LOT of mei fun and I ate all of it. Also ate an orange and almost finished the loaf of bread, which was pretty big.

I don't need this much food. It's disturbing how much time I spend thinking about food, what to eat, what not to eat, how I'm eating too much and I'll regret it later, yet I go ahead and do it anyway. I wish I were happier with who I am, but I'm not very happy at all. I'm content enough with life (or should be) but I can't think of many good things about myself. I should weigh less, exercise more, eat less, eat healthier (although I don't think I'm doing that badly...er, mainly eating rice, wheat, fruit, and oil), study more, procrastinate less, be smarter, be slimmer, be someone else.

I'm not very comfortable with the idea that I should accept myself for who I am instead of thinking that I suck. In one way, if I suck I should try to improve myself but in another way if this is just the way I am I should be happy with it. Or something.

...ugh. No one has any idea what goes on in my mind and I can't even explain it myself.

Make a Meatspace Shuffle.

Construct an iPod shuffle out of food for the chance to win an iPod shuffle!

I like the word "shufflicious". Mmm...shufflicious...mmm...

I can't wait to see all the entries for this.

I have been eating a lot of bread lately, probably more than I have in my entire life. Why? Because...IT'S SO YUMMY!

Two days ago I went to Sullivan Street Bakery for a slice of bianca con pecorino and a pane alle olive. The weather was beautiful and people were sitting outside munching on their "pizza" so I also...sat outside and munched. Little bits of cheese nestled inside bubbles of bread. Ish. Okay, bread doesn't really bubble but you know what I mean. POCKETS! BUBBLE POCKETS! Yes. I don't like olives but I liked that olive loaf, so anything encapsulated in yeasted wheat is probably fine with me.

Before going to the bakery, I went to Kee's Chocolates to buy my mum a birthday present (for those curious enough, her 51st!). We have chocoholic tendencies but have never been to Kee's before. I heard any good things about it, mainly about the creme brulee truffle, and as it was so close to the bakery I figured I'd make a stop there. It's very small but cute with simple decorations (mainly plants) and oh my god, THE SMELL! THE AMAZING SMELL! Kee (I assume) was cooking some slivered almonds in a pan behind the cash register (you can see just about all of the preparation area in there) and it was a to-die-for smell, in my opinion. After saying that my mission was to get a present for my mum, she explained all the chocolates to me, all the while keeping an eye on those almonds. I was afraid of doing anything that could possibly undeliciousize (you know it's a real word) the almonds.

I got a 12 piece box for $19. As for what flavors I got, I don't really remember, but I got most of them. ;) I don't customarily buy single truffles for myself but I had to try the creme brulee, a dessert I used to eat probably too much. As I was getting ready to leave, a warning was given:

"Eat the creme brulee in one bite or the insides will spill out!"

I don't usually eat truffles in one bite as I like to see what's inside, but she was completely right (obviously; she made it!). As I bit into the truffle before going to Sullivan Street Bakery, it satisfyingly gave way (as in, it had that crisp-ness--know what I mean?) to AN ERUPTION OF CREME BRULEE! Okay, not an eruption, but the cracks looked like lava flows. I quickly jammed the rest in my mouth (maybe not the best way to eat chocolate, but oh well) and mmm mmm, I reveled in the bite sized creme brulee-ness. I bet the other truffles taste great too.

Gastronomie, epicurious.com and eGullet have some more info about Kee's Chocolates.

Oh, back to bread! Today I went to Le Pain Quotidien on Grand Street at around 8 AM before going to school. I passed by it last week thinking "Good lord, why didn't I know about this?" Because I don't usually go that far west on Grand! I have to walk around more and find more food (or rather, I shouldn't walk around more...erm). I love the interior design of the place; light browns, wood everywhere, long communal table. Feels cozy and open at the same time. :)

In front were the sweet pastry type goodies and cookies and on the back shelves were bread, huge loaves of em (they also sell spreads and chocolate on side shelves). You could buy some in half or quarter portions, thankfully. I got half a loaf of the walnut bread for $3.95 and they offered to slice it but I like tearing away my bread (and it makes me eat more slowly; sliced bread would be gone in SECONDS! Or MINUTES!). My half ball of wheat was plopped in a wax-lined bag, put into another plastic bag (I guess I didn't need the other bag, oops) and I sat on some nearby stairs to tear off a chunk.

Ah. Happiness. I like eating with my hands and yes, as someone taking food microbiology and living in NYC I know I must ingest loads of crap eating with my hands. MY DIRTY HANDS. Yet I'm okay. Perhaps one day I'll get some horrible microbial intoxication, but I haven't yet.

Today's happiness was brought to you by a morning walk in cool, semi breezy (and humid) weather, half a loaf of bread, and Magnet coming out of my iPod. ;)

Is that a tray of deep fried sesame seed balls?

I casually looked around. No one seemed to be protecting the tray and other people—possibly blind people—failed to notice the tray of FRIED SESAME RICE BALLS, out in the open, free for the taking.

You can take one. Or more. No, just take one for now. If you want more you can come back later.

In the dim light of the TASS Night Market I nicked one of the beautiful, rotund fried glutinous rice balls. Actually, it was quite dark so maybe they didn’t look that good but they tasted damn good; slightly crispy on the outside, chewy and soft on the inside with a splodge of red bean paste in the center. This would occur a few more times during the time, and by “a few” I mean “too many”.

Now, it would’ve been bad enough if only that tray of deep fried sesame seed balls was there, but there was also a tray of miniature egg custard tarts. Wha—WHAT? Had I entered a new level of hell where my willpower would be tested by the chance to endlessly stuff myself with the most delicious Chinese desserts in existence? Now really, that’s just not a fair situation to present to someone all too capable of stuffing herself to the point of vomiting. And it’s not fair to my mental sanity.

I got to the Night Market at around 8:30 PM, a bit late since I had spent the day at Vassar College (also stuffing myself with a seemingly endless array of food; more on that later). I thought most of the food may have been gone by that time and the $7 entrance fee wouldn’t have been worth it, but despite a lot of the food having already been consumed, there was still too much left. I got some fried rice and rice and beef thingy, later some scallion pancakes, also a cup of bubble tea, but my downfall was triggered by the damn deep fried sesame seed balls at the egg tarts.

What kind of downfall? Did I stuff handfuls of the desserts into my bag to eat later? Did I continuously shove them into my mouth? No, but I can’t remember how many of each I ate, leading me to believe that I must’ve had more than five of each as I should be able to remember a number smaller than that. Together that means I ate more than ten pieces. That’s a lot. Think about it.

I can’t think of anything that compares to the perfection of an egg custard tart. They’re low on the sweetness scale but the sweetness level is perfect. The custard is the best part of course, and just the right softness. However, the custard by itself wouldn’t be that special, but putting it in a delicate pastry shell (perhaps wrapping anything in a wheat product makes it taste better) makes it so.

While popping an egg custard tart in my mouth I actually thought to myself, “I’m going to regret this later. Oh well.” And that I did. I thought about it for hours—how could I have eaten so much? Why did I do that? Why doesn’t my stomach just do something to tell me to stop? Come on, an explosion would’ve given me a hint. The human body is an amazing thing but sometimes it’s just stupid.

So far today I’ve had a persimmon for lunch. I guess I should eat dinner to prevent the onset of mental craziness from not eating. But I still feel guilty about the indulgence. I think it partially had to do with me eating by myself. The Night Market was cool and a good $7 dinner but I was essentially alone there. If I had some friends to share the ridiculous fooding with, I may not have thought about overeating so much nor felt as guilty about it. And maybe some outside influence would have stopped me from eating so much in the first place.

But I’m Robyn and somewhat friendless. That’s the price I pay. (I noticed a classmate from the school I went to in Taiwan in middle school and thought about approaching her, but decided against it in the case that she would have no idea who I was.) I think I shouldn’t go to events like the Night Market in the future by myself or any situation that may lead to a doomy stomach. I actually felt okay physically after eating all that (I mean, I’ve felt worse, perhaps comatose) but my mind totally brought me down. I digested in the Kimmel Center student lounge for an hour before talking the 40-minute walk back to my dorm (and I HAD to walk, despite the protests of my mother; if I could only burn 100 calories, it’d be better than nothing). I know it could’ve been worse—I could’ve eaten more or felt more guilty—but it was bad enough for me. I don’t want to experience that again. Or rather, I wish I could eat as much as I wanted without feeling like a fatty.

As for night markets, I absolutely loved them in Taiwan. Or didn’t hate them. They were ridiculously crowded and chaotic experiences with the added impediment of being at night, a time when one must rely on glowing electricity (which doesn’t really compare to sunlight) to pave the way. In my case this meant latching onto a friend/mother to navigate the streets. Strangely enough, I don’t recall the food well at all, but when I lived in Taiwan I wasn’t very into food. That makes me wonder where my interests lied at all. Hm.

I don’t know what gets you going in the morning, but for me it’s the prospect of food, in most cases something baked.

To digress for a moment (immediately after I started typing this entry), my room smells. Smells like…garlic? Good god. Note to roommate: you need to learn to use the fan because I’m as far away from the kitchen as I can get in this room and I feel like I’m wading through a garlic cloud. (Can you wade through a cloud? Well. Now you can.)

Okay, the fan is on. All is good! Food preparation may not continue without…wait, I think the smell is getting worse. No no, the fan sucks up the air, not blows it around. Ah, my roommate brought her food over.

It’s not like my food never smells, but I don’t think it smells as strong.

So back to whatever I was talking about. Yesterday I woke up at 10:30 AM. ON A SUNDAY! I woke up early as I had to complete a few tasks: buy new shoes and get food. Actually, I guess the shoe buying was the only task as I buy food every day. But I had a particular food place in mind…

KOSHER BAKERY! MMM NUMMY! While googling around today I found out that all the worthy Kosher bakeries are apparently in Brooklyn. However, I’m still in my Manhattan bubble. Brooklyn will have to wait.

I went to Gertel’s Bakery on Hester Street but was momentarily stopped when I came across The Sweet Life, just a few doors down from the bakery. As you could probably tell, The Sweet Life is a sweets shop selling lots of bulk candies and dried fruit and nuts. It’s packed like Economy Candy (not very far away, on Rivington) but is much smaller and feels…nicer for some reason. Their small chocolate bar section (a shelf or two?) is impressive but I just wasn’t in the mood for chocolate. So onward to Gertel’s!

To my disappointing, just about everything at Gertel’s was already packed. I guess people who shop there have families or large groups of people to share their food with, while I am just one person and while I could consume an entire box of cookies, I’d rather not. Darn it. I don’t see myself every buying anything from that bakery if I have to buy an entire cake-loaf of some sort. How I’d love to…

Somewhat dejected, I walked towards Prince Street for shoe buying (at the Camper shoe store) but stopped on Grand Street when I remembered that I had yet to visit Kossar’s Bialys. And then I noticed next door to Kossar’s a KOSHER BAKERY. DAMMIT. I mean, I had passed it before but somehow forgot it was there. Amazing. Robyn forgot about the presence of a bakery, a mighty tasty looking one at that.

My first mistake was walking into the bakery. No, my first mistake was waking up and walking out of my dorm. The inside is small and narrow but the display case is aglow with cookies by the pound and loaves of tasty looking things whose names I don’t know. There was also bread in the back but I went straight for the sweets, getting a piece of some chocolate rolled-up thing that may have been chocolate babka (I’ve seen a few variations on chocolate babka so I’m not sure what its supposed to look like exactly) and too many hamantashen and rugelach. I think the woman at the counter gave me more cookies than I asked for but I sure as hell wouldn’t complain about that. Altogether I think I paid around $5 for a generous piece of the delicious-chocolate-thing, three hamantashen and two rugelachs.

Then I hit Kossar’s. When I walked in there was a stack of shelves on my right overflowing with bialys. God, those things are cute. Yes, I like food that looks cute. It also helps to have a cute name and in my opinion, bialy is a cute name. (Pronounced bee-ah-lee? Please correct me if I’m wrong.) I don’t know if there’s anything very special about a bialy but I thought it was delicious. I think I’ve gotten tired of the crusty artisan bread I spent all last week eating so a little, soft chewy bialy was just the ticket. However, I happened to get the only mutated bialy there. IT LOOKED LIKED A BREAST! There’s no other way to say it. Bialys are typically “innies” while mine was an “outtie”, if that makes any sense. I’ll have to show you a photo.

Oh well, still good. I don’t care if my food doesn’t look right as long as it tastes good. Today I went back to Kossar’s and got another bialy, this time a normal looking one. I don’t usually eat while walking but I didn’t want to sit down this time so I ripped it apart while going down Allen Street. It didn’t last long.

Talking about everything I eat is rather tiring.

Today I had the most delicious focaccia bread from the Union Square Greenmarket. I’m sure I’ve seen this vendor before (Buon Pane)but I guess I was never in the mood for focaccia. Last week I was all about crusty loaves of bread while this week I’m all about…something. Not the crusty loaves anymore. Perhaps this is the week of foccaccia with extras, which in today’s case meant tomatoes, basil leaves and mozzarella. I’m on a mission to try the other choices (and there were many) but the Greenmarket is only there four times a week, this particular vendor perhaps less often (I think they"re only there on Monday, unfortunately). For $3.50 I got a two-meal focaccia and $1.50, an absolutely delicious chocolate muffin with nummy chocolate chips (at the same vendor).

I spent $5.50 today (including the $0.50 bialy) which isn’t too bad. I could’ve done worse, could’ve done better. I still spend too much money on food but it forces me to walk further than I may otherwise walk. Yeah, I know it’s self-defeating to walk far to eat something that has a gazillion calories, but…meh. Gotta live life somehow. Today I opted to walk through the Lower East Side as opposed to the scene Soho route to check out Russ and Daughters (lots of goodies inside but I wasn’t in the mood for chocolate, cream cheese, or…fish. Interesting combination, perhaps, and it smells very much like fish inside, although not in a bad way) and ultimately ended up at Kossar’s.

And then I came back to my dorm and pigged out. Thus is the life of a girl who lives in downtown Manhattan and doesn’t have enough to do, except for homework. Damn, I should do some of that. Homework.

Where will you eat tomorrow, Robyn? Where? WHEEERE? ANSWER ME!

That’s what my brain says to me most nights (what, you don’t converse with your brain?). Alright, every night. It’s actually a dilemma sometimes to try and figure out where to eat despite (or because) there are a gazillion choices. Do I want bread? What kind of bread? Or do I want cake? No, I shouldn’t eat cake. How about that bakery on Prince Street? Okay, how about sushi?

I like trying new things but I also have a tendency to stick to the same places. I should be more adventurous, I suppose. It also gives me an excuse to eat more.

Today I woke up at 10:00 AM and started breakfast with an orange. Not bad, right? Fruit is healthy! …when you eat it alone. I also ate a slice of my roommate’s long-expired bread that has been lurking on the fridge’s bottom shelf since February. No, wait, it expired in February so I guess it has been there for even longer, becoming even more friendly with the plastic barrier it is incased in, perhaps even turning into plastic by this point. I’m sure she’d think I’m a nut job if she knew I ate it, but folks, when I say I like bread, I mean it. I don’t kid with bread. My roommate hasn’t touched it in so long probably because she forgot it was there. I don’t know why she keeps forgetting about her food (she does clean it out every once in a blue moon; the garbage bin weighed a ton the last time I took it out); it’s not as though she doesn’t like to eat. I guess the ways in which people enjoy eating are different, she being sensible and me being a psychotic bread addict with an internal indicator that beeps when bread is nearby.

I left my dorm at around noon, hauling my backpack with laptop in tow, and headed towards Sullivan Street Bakery. Someday I will try the Yoghurt Place right next door, but I was pretty set on going to the bakery for some reason. I got a slice of the zucchini pizza and a raisin walnut roll for $3.50 and practically inhaled them after forking my dough over to the nice cashier (or perhaps after he forked the dough over to me—haha. Oh, that was painful). I mean, I enjoyed them but for no good reason I ate them like a famished squirrel just out of hibernation. The last time I went to the Sullivan Street Bakery (just a week ago) I recall not finishing my “pizza” right away and saving my roll until later. WHAT HAPPENED TO EATING SENSIBLY? The pizza and roll (chock full of raisins) were delicious, of course. My wheat level was full but I still felt like eating.

So. Where to now? There wasn’t any place in particular I wanted to go but I recalled hearing that Oren’s Daily Roast sold pastries. Since I was already en route to campus, I took the little detour to Oren’s. There wasn’t anything there that I really wanted though (they’ve got lots of cookies and biscotti) so I went back to thinking about food. FOOD. WHERE. WHERE IS THE FOOD (besides the obvious answer that it is everywhere, surrounding and taunting my very presence). I remembered passing a boulangerie/patisserie on University Place yesterday so I went towards there, figuring “It’s somewhere on University Place, not that far” when in reality it was at around 12th or 13th Street. Okay, that’s not much farther beyond 8th Street which for some reason is where I thought it was but at some point I was thinking, “Damn, I’m walking all this way to get a cookie?” Which was ironic because I didn’t want any cookies from Oren’s, but I don’t make any sense. My feet were powered by the prospect of cookies. (If you want me to go somewhere, just tell me there’s a really good bakery. ”You should visit the African savannah!” “Why, to see elephants and stuff?” “Well, they’ve got this great bakery…” And before my friend has had the chance to tell me that the bakery specializes in elephant-based pastries—excuse my stupid hypothetical situation as I’m sure bakeries don’t specialize in elephants—I’m out the door.)

The bakery is small and specializes in “things full of butter”, and by that I mean flaky pastries such as croissants and croissant-esque things. Oh, and cookies. I got a chocolate chip cookie larger than my hand and a spinach and cheese pate. They also sell paninis, bagels, and CUPCAKES, so I’ll have to go back someday for the cupcakes. Like right now. Haha. Ha. Okay, tomorrow. Or later. Although they don’t have a sign that says so, they give student discounts.

I don’t usually eat croissant-esque things but the spinach and cheese pate was delicious, probably because it was full of fat. Mm yes, wheat and fat are a good combination. It wasn’t bursting with filling but had a good amount. The cookie was one of the crunchy kinds and I’ve rarely met a cookie I didn’t like. So…I liked this cookie. Methinks I’ll have to go back and try their other ones, or try Oren’s cookies also.
Last week I was on an “only eat loaves of bread” kick but now I want cookies. Actually, I don’t REALLY want cookies but being in search of a certain food that one is likely to find in many places makes fooding more fun. It gives me an excuse to try different places. We’ll see how long I can manage my cookie hunt (I’d say a few days before I start to realize how fat I’m getting).

Oh, I’m getting fatter. :( I’m not wearing my fat gauging pants right now but I’m wearing my “comfy” pants that, while comfy, are feeling tighter than usual. Too much junk in my belly. NOO. I don’t have a baby hiding in there (although it looks like I may be) so I can’t use that as an excuse.

Argh. Food. You mock me.

---some time later---

So it’s about 4:45 PM right now and I’ve been thinking about eating for the past millennium. Once Upon a Tart is nearby, right? Or what about City Bakery? That’s probably less than a mile from where I’m sitting right now. They have that chocolate chip cookie I need to ingest before I die. Of course, Oren’s is a short walk away. Oh, what else is there? LE PAIN! Le Pain is right on 8th Street!

I swear, this is what I’ve been thinking of while doing my English homework, which was to describe stylistic elements of Calvin Trillin’s writing. His essays that I read are about food, so I can’t say this assignment ameliorated my false hunger for baked goods. Calvin Trillin is awesome, by the way. I already figured that out but having to look into his writing style more closely has made his awesomeness more apparent to me (and my stomach).

I’m quite sure that the Devil or some other evil entity (pigeons?) invented pastries. Evil. Evil little doomie doom things of evil.

If I don’t force myself to sit here longer and do homework I’m going to go to Le Pain.

I ate a lot today, but I don't feel like I did. That's what happens when instead of eating a loaf of bread you eat lots of smaller things. I'm too lazy to get into the details but here's a rundown of today's fooding:

• 8 AM: a lemon blueberry muffin ($1.75) from Connecticut Muffin on Prince St
• 11 AM: vegetable curry ($5.50) from Curry House (part of JAS Mart) on St. Marks Place
• 4 PM: half of an egg bagel and a third of a carrot raisin muffin ($2.15 together) from Bagel Bob's on University Place
• 7 PM: shanghainese (or something) noodles with vegetable wontons ($5, REALLY yummy) from Wonton Garden on Mott St
• 8 or 9 PM ish: the rest of the bagel and muffin

Overall, that's a CRAPload of food. And I spent almost $15. I know that's not a CRAPLOAD but that's a lot more than I would've spent if I...weren't impulsive. Bagel Bob's was totally impulsive. I was walking to 30th Street and it was on the way. Ha ha. I sat in Union Square along with a gazillion other people to soak in the rays and nosh a bit.

I dunno why I'm not obese yet. I'm indulging too much though. Do I eat anything with nutrients? Mrrh? I didn't even eat fruit today. :(

Bread is dangerous! Tell me something I DON'T know. I need to live in a bread-free zone, seriously. [via grow a brain]

I think my bread obsession has waned a bit over the last week. In its place has sprouted A COOKIE OBSESSION. HOLY F***K, I'm screwed. I'm way behind in my food photos but trust me, I've got enough of them to fill several grain silos. Here's a list of yesterday's fooding, everything except for the last two hit up with my mum:

1. New Green Bo - All the hype I read about theis scallion pancakes is true. They're the best scallion pancakes I've had so far in Chinatown, not that I've had a lot of them, but the outside was like a thin and crispy wrapping around the soft, chewy insides. The insides would fall out if I wasn't careful enough. Damn, that's good. DAMN. The soup dumplings are great too (my mum and I got pork) and the chow mein my mum wanted (we weren't planning to finish everything, don't worry) was yummy too. The service was friendly, as I had heard before, but the people we were sitting with at a big table became frustrated with a long wait and left in a huff. It was unfortunate because a few moments after they left, their food came out. Come on, restaurant customers, don't be such jerk-offs. Their indignation wasn't complete unfounded as my mum and I got out food before they did despite ordering similar food, but I think people should be more accomadating in Chinatown. It wasn't like their food wasn't going to come out at all; they knew that!
2. Le Pain Quotidien - My mum got some cookies and a box of Charlemange chocolate, which I've never seen anywhere else before. I enjoyed the six different flavor of their 0.3 ounce chocolate squares (actually, I think one flavor is no flavor, just chocolate), my favorite one being "violette". Good stuff, go try it.
3. Marie Belle - This store specializes in chocolate but my mum bought honey and tea. I think I could eat one of their jars of honey, all the more reason for me to not take one of my mum's jars liek she offered!
4. Sullivan Street Bakery - My mum and I shared a Tortino di Cioccolato. Deeelicious. Like an intense brownie with minimal flour. The only problem was without the flour it was messy to eat but it wasn't mean to be eaten with your hands.
5. Balthazar Bakery - I got a sticky bun and my mum bought a bag of chocolate nut cookies and biscotti. The taste of the sticky bun was great but the texture was too hard in my opinion. I mean, it was ...crunchy in some parts. The center was deliciously soft and the caramel and nuts tasted so good. I can't describe it, you'll just have to try it yourself. But the outside layer of the bun was hard and I don't know why...hohum. I want to try their scones at some point. The little chocolate cookies my mum got were awesome, really intense chocolate flavor.
6. City Bakery - I wanted to try one of their famous chocolate chip cookies before heading to see a Beck concert. I thought the cookies costed more than $2 but nope, $2 will buy you a wheaty disc of chocolate chip goodness. I was very satisfied with my cookie; believe the hype! Actually, it can be dangerous to believe the hype about food, but it was a really good cookie. At first I thougth "Hm, it's good but I'm not feeling it yet" and then after getting to the center of the cookie I found that it was awesomely soft and crunchy but not too much of either one. From the taste I feel like it must've had good ingredients, like MM TASTY BUTTER but I don't actually know. The crunchy bits reminded me of extremely thin crunchy buttery cookies and the soft parts were...heavenly.
7. The Donut Pub - I went here after the Beck concert because I knew it was nearby. I was afraid that I wasn't going to find it even though I was sure it was on 14th Street and lo and behold, I ultimately found the awning proclaming "THE DONUT PUB" in large glowing white sans-serif letters. I was just planning to get a donut seeing as it is a donut shop, but they also had scrumptious looking chocolate chip cookies. For research purposes (cough), I got a chocolate chip cookie ($1.75) in addition to a apple cinnamon filled donut ($0.90). I enjoy cookies more than donuts, it's no contest. The donut was yummy, but as someone who rarely eats donuts and has had a jelly filled donut perhaps once in her lifetime, I don't know how this one compares to others. I'm not really into jelly filled donuts since I don't like..jelly, but this was like apple-sauce jelly and I do like me some apaplesauce. Oh, the cookie was AWESOME! Really! No, not like City Bakery (the flavor didn't have that same kick) but taste-wise I thought it was excellent. Soft although not falling apart, gooey chocolate chips...oh, it's yummy.

...don't tell me this list isn't somewhat insane. It is. I must be really fat right now.

This Monday TUESDAY, swing by Ben & Jerry's for free cone day. Hell yes.

...I just realized that there are two of these near school. I CAN EAT TWO! OH MY GOD! NOO! GOD DAMMIT!

...yet I already ate enough to feed an army. An army that loves wheat.

First off, you know I'm gluttonous for waking up at 7 AM after less than 5 hours of sleep just so I could justify eating breakfast. WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE? Sleep is good! I enjoy sleep! But not as much as eating! EATING IS WORSE FOR MY HEALTH (haha) THAN SLEEP! It's wrong.

So I was out by 8 AM and stopped by Pamela's Bake Shop on 4th Street just west of Broadway for...something baked. I got a carrot muffin ($1.75) and thankfully it also had raisins and nuts in it (I thought it would just have carrot). While there weren't enough nuts, there were loads of raisins and lots of carrot flavor. I don't see myself going to Pamela's Bake Shop a lot since my reason for fooding is to try different places but it's extremely convenient for students around NYU. Besides muffins they also have scones, croissants, and other stuff I can't recall. The scones looked good. Mm yes.

About two and a half hours later I went to the Union Square Greenmarket to meet up with Diana and get some food. I got yet another chocolate chip cookie from a vendor who didn't have any signage. It was one of those huge, probably 500+ calorie $1.50 cookies. It was good but was more of a thin crunchy cookie than the soft chewy kind. I still stand by my belief that the Donut Pub's and City Bakery's chocolate chip cookies are the best thus far. I have so many more cookies to try. I got a focaccia with mushroom, spinach, and mozzerella from the market as well and it was yummy but would've been so much better if I had willpower and could have saved it to bring home and re-bake in my oven. It's a great buy at $3.50 though and I justify it's somewhat healthy for the four or five spinach leaves. :p

And then. IMPULSE BUY ALERT! NYU's campus dining has started carrying Crumbs cupcakes, which I've heard of but never tried before. I figured I could use my campus cash and that would somehow not count (although the calories are all sitting in my belly). I got a Devil Dog cupcake for $3.50 after pondering perhaps a little too long which flavor to get.

Overall impression is that it was good cake and good frosting but the wrong proportions of both. Something I like about cupcakes is that they're small or else they'd be like mini-cakes. In Robyn's world, a mini-cake is larger than a cupcake. Don't ask me why; it's just the way things are. So anyway, these cupcakes are GIGANTIC (as noted in this cupcake article) and that's all fine and good considering it costed $3.50 but I want to finish a cupcake kind of wanting more, not thinking "Oh shit, I just ate a cupcake the size of a softball." In my opinion, the cake was delicious (even the chewy parts around the edge; the bottom part was super soft and moist) and the smooth frosting was just the right sweetness, but since the cake was so big, there wasn't enough frosting to balance it out. It was more like a regular cake than a cupcake to me. Needs more of that frosting!

It's all a matter of personal taste of course. I finished the cupcake despite that it could've fed two people, but I wouldn't buy one again unless I could share it with someone else. I think it definitely needed more frosting. PILE IT ON! It made me long for a Magnolia cupcake, even though their frosting is way sweet and sometimes has a bad texture. But they put on loads, I think. Crumbs makes a yummy not overly sweet cake but...I want less of it! Decrease the cake and leave the frosting or increase it.

Pray that I won't eat more today. But I might and if I do, you'll hear about it (maybe in the form of sobbing in a corner of my room).

I ate way too much today, and by that I mean I ate enough for at least two days. Or more. Or a hippo. Something like that. I don't even know what hippos eat but they bring to mind a lot of food. Hell, they have their own board game based on eating!

I felt terribly guilty walking home with a container of noodles with sesame sauce in hand and 4 navel oranges in my backpack. In between buying those two items, I went to Fried Dumpling on Mosco Street and tried five fried pork dumplings. Delicious. Absolutely delicious. WHY! WHY!? Five juicey golden crispy pork-filled dumplings for a goddamn dollar?

I ate them in that park by Mulberry Street near a fence that divided me from the teenage boys playing basketball. I stuffed myself while a bunch of guys were exercising. Yup, I'm a prime representation of the female gender. Those five dumplings were enough food for dinner but I just had to go to Tasty Dumpling to try the noodles. I've never had noodles with sesame sauce before so I wanted to try it. Verdict? Yummier than it looks. It doesn't look really bad but it's just..splodgey. The shredded cucumber was a nice touch as a garnish. The noodles were thick udon-like noodles, which I love. (Hell, I love all noodles.)

I also ate two navel oranges later in the day. Er...night. Er. Um. I ATE SO MUCH. The end. Spent between $10-$15 I think, except I bought the cupcake with my NYU ID card so it's not cash out of my wallet.

I can't bring any money with me to school tomorrow. Just can't. And I'm sure as hell not going to use my campus cash. Cos. Yes. Pray for me.

After yesterday's mega food indulgence I tried to make sure not to eat as much today. How so? Um. Hm. Leaving the wallet at home helps.

But it's not enough because I have "campus cash" on my ID card and THAT MONEY CAN BUY FOOD. Dammit. The next step is to not have any campus cash but I'll have to use it up first. Seeing as I won't make craploads of photocopies, the easiest way to use it up will be to buy food. I did use it a few times to buy groceries but I've stopped buying loads of groceries.

Uh. So. This isn't a very happy entry as I failed my plan to not eat a lot. I didn't eat craploads but I ate more than I was planning to, which was to just eat some oranges and not buy anything. I stayed in the Kimmel Center for about five hours before I got to the point of ...wanting food. At some point I realized I had nothing, absolutely NOTHING to look forward to that day because I wasn't planning to buy food. If I were going to a concert that would be something to look forward to but all I had was a class. Not very cool. So despite not being hungry, I got something to eat.

Food.

Yup, another food post...obviously.

I ate too much today. I did that two days ago. Note to self: leave wallet at home tomorrow, and perhaps every other day I feel like going out into the calorie-dense microcosm of NYC.

"A fat man's gotta plan." I keep that in mind, but I don't follow it (that's not the exact quote but it's close enough). I need to get some advice from Calvin Trillin's friend, Fats Goldberg. He weighed 300-something pounds during his college years but then dropped about half his weight through his own diet.

I hate, hate, hate eating so much. There's no underlying reason to why I eat so much besides that I (un)fortunately have enough money to eat a lot and I don't get pukingly full when any normal person would. Remember, I'm a 5 foot tall girl. If I were a tall guy this wouldn't be an issue.

You should have seen how much food was at today's recipe testing session in my "communications in food studies" class. Just...craploads.

I didn't eat anything. I lost my appetite when I found out we weren't testing our own recipes but rather other people's. I made a classmate's fried eggplant. How's that for something Robyn never eats? I don't even cook much. So over time it became less about not having an appetite and more about "God I fuckin...hate being here...there's too much food." The desserts looked best; two kinds of peanut butter cookies (one with Valrhona chocolate), a coconut custard thing, jackfruit and banana spring rolls (made by my teacher), sweet potato...something. Oh, and a Jewish sweet noodle thing. The savory dishes looked good too. OH, and macaroons. That was my recipe.

So that was fun. Not. I felt like crap. I had to pretend i didn't for as long as I could while interacting with classmates to the best of my ability, which is not...a very good ability. Nothing is wrong with my classmates; I just didn't want to be there. Two other girls didn't eat anything but that's because they have to keep kosher.

I feel sick. But not really. After class (my teacher's babysitter brought in her baby daughter and I gotta say, she's really cute for a baby/toddler) I went out to Gould Plaza to call my mum because I didn't know who else to talk to. Of course, talking to my mum doesn't help much but at least I know she listens...maybe. Even if she can't help. I started crying while talking to her. Not perceptibly, I think, but I hate tearing up, especially for really stupid things. And I still feel like crying but I'll just think of something else, like how diskobox.net isn't working right now because the bandwidth got used up. That doesn't usually happen. I just have to allot more.

Hate food. Or rather. Hate getting fat from eating food. Today was chilly but I wore a skirt because my favorite pants don't fit comfortably enough. They were fine two weeks ago. I wonder if it'll take me two weeks to get back to them being comfortable again. Wow, school would be over by then.

Anyway, I figured being depressed now would be better than eating and feeling guilty from that. I can't think of anything that I can eat without feeling guilty today. One of my classmates made a nice salad but I didn't want it. I mean, I don't really want salads anyway. There were also loads of apples but i didn't want apples. All I want is food that's uneahtlhy, thus I can't really eat anything. Because I shouldn't eat that.

I bet I'll be fine in a few days, which just makes this all even stupider.

I ended up eating 2 navel oranges today after a 20-hour fast. I wasn't even hungry; it was just there. I have one orange left. So tomorrow I'll either just eat one orange or something else. I'm scared of "something else".

In my western lit class we had to read essays by Montaigne (maybe i misspelled that) and in one of them he said how it's who you eat with that's more important than what you eat, or possibly every other aspect of eating. I think that's a good point. Kind of. To an extent. I'm more comfortable eating by myself than people I'm not really good friends with. The people in my class are great, but I'm not close to any of them.

And I'm better off not eating at all. The people who tell me to eat less (friends and family) are of course the ones I'd eat with the most. And it doesn't really make sense to do that.

After much pain, the COMMENTS finally work. POST COMMENTS IF YOU WANT!!! Sorry, I didn't know about the template problem before but that wasn't even the majr problem; comments weren't working at all due to some plug-ins screwing things up. Gaaah. Whatever. I should probably phase out using Movable Type for something more userfriend like WordPress...

So I haven't eaten in more than 25 hours. I feel fine though. Calvin Trillin talked about fat people eating due to visual cues but otherwise not knowing the feeling of true hunger. That's definitely me. I used to get sick of hearing people moan about not having eaten in a three hour period but maybe they're genuinely hungry and I just don't get it.

...actually, I don't think they're really hungry. I've probably done that too but I know I'm not hungry. I hope I don't get feverish tomorrow since that's what happened a few days ago. I didn't even do a full fast (I ate an orange somewhere in between) but I woke up feeling un-good. However, that sickly feeling isn't as bad as the psychological guilt of eating too much. Last night I ate way too much so I felt physically bad in addition to psychologically. Bad combination.

I don't know what's wrong with me. I don't get hungry, but I don't get un-hungry. Even when I feel like I've eaten too much, I continue to eat as long as there's food in front of me (never bring me to a buffet!). I can eat whenever, or choose not to if I'm depressed enough. I have no food in my dorm or else I'd eat it, even though I'm not hungry. It's very important that I don't have extra food to munch on. My roommate is the complete opposite; she constantly has to throw out food that has gone bad and she is in the process of using up old food in creative ways.

I wish I could live alone, I really do. Or live with a friend. But I get neither. I should just be thankful to be alive, but I don't even enjoy living that much. I live because I'm not about to kill myself. I guess I'd be afraid if someone were to hold a gun to my head, but I don't have a zest for life. Zest. I mean, if you have to eat to live, and if I have problems with eating (of course, my blog shows that I've enjoyed it too but if you have such sharp contrasts between enjoying and hating food like I do, let me know) then living isn't that enjoyable. Besides that, I suck at everything I do but that's not something fit for this blog...

My pants aren't as comfortable as I'd like them to be. I haven't figured out a good way to make them more comfortable besides to lose weight and I haven't figured out a good way to lose weight besides to stop eating. If I last another day, I'll let you know.

All I "crave" is a loaf of bread, but I know that's not healthy. Most of the foods I crave besides fruit aren't healthy and I feel a bit guilty eating those foods. But if I can't eat what I want and be satisfied, I'd rather eat nothing. I'm only 19, I really shouldn't mess myself up eating crap. I can think of the things I don't ingest (coffee, alcohol, soda, ...drugs) but it's not good enough. Nothing's good enough. It goes beyond food; there are too many high standards and I keep mine low but it's not good enough.

For people like me, undereating triggers the urge to make up for what we have missed, but overeating simply whets out appetite for the joys to come
-Jeffrey Steingarten

In my case, undereating means my caloric intake drops for what is probably a refreshing period of time for my digestive system and overeating is…what happens when I don’t undereat. It’s rare for me to just “eat”, figuring that’s the central point between overeating and undereating (and such a point is, in my world, hidden in a black hole).

The past few days have not been good food-wise. On Thursday I chose to not eat much since I ate too much the previous day. I got to the 20 hour fasting mark before eating a few navel oranges. The next day I woke up feverish and decided it was an eating day, except it resulted in me terribly overeating to the point where I thought “Oh, this must be what fullness feels like: very gassy.” Saturday morning I woke up feeling a bit funky and decided not to eat at all. The day was a blur of depression and sleepiness, brought to a halt by my roommate returning and instantly instilling the desire of “get off my butt”-ness. I dragged myself to the school library—by taking the bus. I figured I didn’t need to benefit from 40 minutes of walking if I hadn’t eaten anything.

So I did go to B&H this morning. Waking up early and walking = bad for Robyn. IN WHAT DIMENSION HAS WAKING UP EARLY AND WALKING BECOME HARMFUL FOR MY HEALTH?

I'm screwed. And what's with the eweather? It was so chilly this morning (still is rather chilly, at least it's beautiful) that I'm wearing my winter coat today.

challah and pancakes

Anyway, I got pancakes and challah bread with butter. There weren't many people there when I got there (sometime before 8:30) so that's good, I guess. Some people came in for juice. One guy wanted a shot of wheat grass. Fun way to start your morning: with chrolophyll! The pancakes were a little undercooked but hey, I'm not picky when it comes to pancakes so I ate em (I didn't finish them, but maybe if I didn't get the bread I would have). The best pancakes I've ever had were still at the Ridegewood pancake house, ahh how I miss it. The challah bread was yummy. They have lots of other food but I didn't try any; maybe another time when it's not breakfast. I'm more likely to go to a place alone to eat breakfast (since not many people are around anyway) than any other meal though. I'm not sure how much each thing cost (prices aren't labeled on the wall menu) but it was less than $5, so I gave the guy ...$5.

Then I walked up 2nd Ave because I heard there was a Taylor's Bakery there online. I've walked 2nd Ave a number of times in my life and I'D KNOW if there were a bakery. So...it's not there anymore. There's one in Tribeca which is much closer to me than the East Village yet I never go there. I should go there...for the bakery.

semi-smashy pumpkin cupcake

takoyaki

I try to plan out my food, but many times it doesn't work that way. My plan before going to B&H was to get pancakes and challah bread, nothing else. Done! Satisfyingly full. But then I went to Panya bakery because it was really close and got a takoyaki and a pumpkin cupcake (which I'll excuse for not having icing because it's a Japanese bakery and...uh, they're allowed to do things differently. That wouldn't fly in an American bakery). I haven't eaten em yet so I guess I have SOME standards, as in I gotta wake 3+ hours before I dig into those. The curry puffs at Panya look delicious so I have an excuse to go back some other time. I mean, EVERYTHING there looks good but for some reason I bypass the case closer to the door with the more intricate cakes and puddings and go straight to the one with all the buns, croissants, and fried things. They're having a 10% off sale (and they've got some kind of strawyberry theme going on) so you should go. I saved a quarter. What can a quarter buy me? No clue, but...I have an extra one now.

My mum said the weirdeset thing to me the other day (in my opinion); that I have a need to go out and do things with people and because of that, I'll marry soon. Yes, because as you can see I do things with other people ALL THE TIME and my desperate hope for a boyfriend has really shone through over the past 19 years. I have no idea why she'd say something like that. I think I was making up excuses to not go out since I wasn't in a good mood but what she said made no sense at all. I can't even think of any hard evidence that points towards my need for people. I mean, I like people but her remarks were way off the psychological mark. I think I average eating with people once or twice a week and, as you can see, I'm pretty well off the other 12 possible times that I eat (I usually eat twice a day--I've never eaten SO MUCH BREAKFAST in my life before living in NYC).

I googled "how many calories in babka" and MY WEBSITE CAME UP FIRST.

That's so unhelpful. So I ate a plain babka today but it didn't look anything like this (I got it from that meat shop on 2nd Ave around 10th Street-ish...yeah, it says MEAT on the sign but they push babkas in their window). So...hm. I have to say, I'm not sure what babka looks like because i have seen it in a few different forms. The one I got looked more like a huge mushroom than an un-frosted cake. Funny thing is that there were about 10 raisins in THE ENTIRE LOAF. I thought the raisins were a mistake at first, but ...actually, there were less than 10. It was weird. Babka is really airy and soft and it's yummy but sadly, not very satisfying. Even if the one I ate had 1500 calories (good god...well, I ate it over a 6 hour period).

I went to Little Poland for brekkie. Cute place, I LIKE it and I must go back for more. Why? Because they have a combo plate on which you get a pancake, half a waffle and a piece of French toast ($5.40). It's perfect for the person who loves all three but is pained to have to choose one. Everything was cooked right, French toast seemed of the eggier kind, but I also got a little cup of orange juice and it was actually the perfect amount. It was like a double-shot glass, which might show how un-used to drinking juice I am (I don't remember the last time I've drank it). I finished my entire plate of yummy carb + butter + maple syrup-ness so I guess it was the right amount, or rather, I'm a pig.

Sweet Dreams: mmm, those are some good looking candies. Now, if only they were real:

A mid-term project during winter term 2004/2005 at the KISD K�ln International School of Design in cooperation with Koelnmesse GmbH. Twenty-four students from seven countries planned, developed and designed products for the sweets market. The drafts were realized as models and shown with huge feedback at the ISM 2005 in Cologne.

My little rundown:

• Pop Ups look a bit scary. What flavor is that?
• Noobs: OH MY GOD, I WANT THAT!!!
• Foaming Joe: awesome

[via core77]

I've been eating so much yet today I am wearing my "fat gauging pants" because THEY FIT even though I am fat. So I guess they don't work that well. BUT THEY FIT. ALRIGHT. Anyhoo, I'm going to describe what I've been eating over the past few days starting with today.

Mama's food!

Today I met up with my fooding friend (I have ONE fooding friend, thank the lord) and we went to Mama's Food Shop on East 3rd St for lunch. I kept hearing that the portions were gargantuan and while they werwe large, they weren't nearly as large as the hype (hype being that they would pile your plate a mile high). HYPE IS BAD! But one order is definitely enough for two. We got a little more than that and still finished everything. Why? BECAUSE IT WAS SO GOOD! We got roasted chicken with sides of macaroni and cheese, string beans, and glazed sweet potatoes. Since we got there right when it opened, everything was pretty fresh. They serve most items at room temperature or colder but that didn't bother me (the string beans were cold like a salad and the potatoes were room temp). The macaroni and cheese, something I haven't had in years, was really good! String beans tasted fresh and crisp and the chicken was moist and pretty flavorful. Oh, and sweet potatoes are so yummy, I could eat loads. Overall we liked the sides better (I'm not sure about Mimi but I'm not a huge meat person) so if we went back we'd just go for a bunch of sides. It was about $15 which is a good deal splitting it up. It's home-style food except better (at least better than what I could make). And when I say home-style, I really mean it; you clean off your dishes and put them in the sink when you're done!

Wanna watch some weird Japanese food commercials? SURE! Here's one for Kewpie pasta sauce (that girl is creeping me out) and another one (doesn't that girl look like a young Bjork?).

I've going to have "TAAARAKOO" stuck in my head all day. Good god. Commercials are evil. Lots of weird little kewpie things jumping around dressed up like tarako. NIGHTMARES, I predict nightmares! [from rehime]