The Girl Who Ate Everything

Belated Intro to Taipei, or "What's That Smell?"

2013-05-19T09:17:29Z

In October of 2011, I visited Taipei—the city where my parents went to college and where my dad and his parents currently live—for the first time in over a decade, accompanied by one of my best friends, Lee Anne, whose maternal grandparents live in Taipei. I'm guessing I wrote this post near the end of 2011, but it fell by the wayside because my words reach peak coherence when they're allowed to ferment for one and a half years JUST KIDDING I am really slow. So I'm writing about the trip now, long after my memories of the trip have mostly fizzled into question marks, because I won't setting for "giving up"—but I will settle for "barely trying." Well there, here we go.

: A road in Taipei.

I couldn't get it out of my head. The question I asked myself shortly after stepping onto the streets of downtown Taipei. What's that smell? Not a lip-curling, is-that-the-stench-of-decay-or-did-someone-fart smell, but a mild, omnipresent scent that says, "You're definitely in Taipei."

And thus I became unnaturally flush with excitement* when one night out of the blue Lee Anne said, "There's a distinct smell here." Oh, Lee Anne [clutches chest]—you totally get me. In addition to "BFF" you have earned the badge of "SMELL PARTNER 4 LYFE." And you're really smart, so I bet you know what the smell is.

* I mean, I'm easily excited, but it's usually at the hands of a voluminous ice cream sundae or a puppy acting helpless in a totally nonthreatening situation and thus looking immeasurably cute, not by smells.

"Oh my god, yes! The smell! There's a smell! You know the smell! ...What is this smell?"

"I think it's a mix of food and exhaust," Lee Anne started. "With some incense." Keep going. "And a bit of air freshener." Keeeep going. "And...toilet?" I nodded. It's not a scent I'd apply to my skin, but If I could bottle up Taipei street air and take it home for the occasional closed-eyed whiff, I would. It would transport me back to Taipei in a way nothing else can.

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Nice door.

Taipei's smell was one thing about Taipei that hadn't changed since my last visit in 1999 and when I had lived there from 1996 to 1998 (6th and 7th grade, if I am to date myself). Most things were familiar: towering department stores, alleyways full of restaurants and shops, 7-11s and Family Marts on every other corner, rows of scooters waiting at traffic lights, rows of scooters parked by the sidewalk, grime-dripping buildings that look like they'll be torn down before they ever get washed, dingy eateries aglow with fluorescent lights.

: Taipei City Hall station, doughnuts, and Taipei 101.

Things that were different: Mister Donut, Taipei 101, bubble tea shops galore, far fewer stray dogs (the overpopulation of stray dogs is still a big problem, though), and the metro. The best new thing to me is the metro/MRT, which was but a stunted newborn the last time I saw it. It's clean! Bright! Spacious! Easy to follow! With trains that run smoothly and frequently! With clear announcements in Chinese and English! And the stations have restrooms—restrooms that don't make you fear for the potential horrors within! Ignoring that New York City's subway system has instilled me with low standards (it's very good for what it is—I do keep in mind it's an over hundred-year-old system that runs 24/7), I'm pretty sure Taipei's metro is objectively great.

: Grandma looking out the window of a relative's apartment. A fancypants apartment.

Another difference: my grandparents. It's been years since I last saw them—perhaps a decade. They were old the last time I saw them; now they're...really old. More specifically, my grandma ("ama" in Taiwanese) is 91 and my grandpa ("agong" in Taiwanese) is 94. When I was little, I'd semi-joke that they'd live forever. They've outlasted colon cancer and stomach cancer; they really are en route to reaching 100.

If it was hard to communicate with them before, it was even harder now. They speak Taiwanese, some Japanese, and little-to-almost-no English. I speak English. The end. (Monolingual Asian Americans, unite!...in shame.) Since the last time I saw her, Ama went deaf in one ear and now suffers from dementia. Agong hasn't lost his hearing or much cognitive ability, but since he's on the "almost no" end of speaking English (Ama is on the "little" end), I've grown up rarely speaking to him and vice versa. Most of my communication with my grandparents has gone through my mom and dad. I have little emotional connection with them—not necessarily because of the language barrier, but it sure doesn't help.

I was genuinely happy to see them, though. They're still my family, and they remind me of my utterly carefree childhood. I think I was mostly glad to see them because I was hoping they'd be glad to see me. Agong is about as expressive as he is good at speaking English—his smile is like a lazy frown—but I'll assume I brought him some modicum of repressed joy. Ama is the opposite; she would eagerly hold my hands just to feel my skin, grab my arm and pretend to gnaw on it like it was a meaty chicken leg (in a good way, if that makes any sense), and stare at me with massively hopeful eyes and a pure smile usually reserved for girls meeting their favorite Disney princess for the first time. It made me think, "It's a good thing you don't know me that well, nor could you, because I could never live up to your expectations."

And thus I'm ashamed by how annoyed I became when Ama would ask me a question and I'd answer her a few times, louder with each repeat, and then a few moments later she'd ask me the same question because she forgot I had already answered her. All the while, Dad would act as translator between us, which made things feel more frustrating. Ama probably didn't remember anything we talked about, but I guess it doesn't matter.

: Or maybe I did eat a lot, I dunno.

I'm writing this intro because as my handful of posts about Taipei unfurl at the speed of an overweight sloth, you may notice a lack of food. I mean, I still ate a lot, but not as much as you might expect a food blogger to eat during a one-week vacation in Taipei, one of the most food-dense cities in one of the world's most food-crazed countries/states/omg wut is it. It's because my vacation was part vacation, part fulfilling filial duty. Because I stayed with my dad and grandparents during my meager one-week trip, I spent a good chunk of that week with my dad and grandparents. Eating breakfast, lunch, or dinner. Going to the doctor's office. Going to another doctor's office. Meeting relatives and family friends I hadn't seen since I was prepubescent. Shopping for furniture and household appliances. This meant far less time for eating my way around Taipei with friends.

But I don't regret it. Someday I'll take a trip to Taipei for the purpose of transforming into a bulbous fleshlump engorged on Night Market vittles, but this was not that trip. The time I spent with my grandparents was a worthwhile experience, even if it wasn't what I set out to do.

It wasn't just spending time with my grandparents that was valuable, but also with my dad, whom I hadn't seen in about two years. I got to see what my dad does on a regular basis to take care of his parents, which was a lot until he recently hired a few caretakers to help out. He didn't need to give round-the-clock attention, but it was more than I think most people would want to do in their 60s. I can't imagine having to take care of my parents when they're in their 90s, but if they needed my help, I'd do it. And although I doubt I'll live long enough, I might be that 90-something-year-old someday.

: OMG YOU GUYZ ASIAN STATIONERY

The other reason I didn't eat nearly as much as I could've is because Taiwan, like much of East Asia, is home to [booming voice of God] CUTE STATIONERY OFTEN EMBLAZONED WITH ENGLISH WORDS, EMPHATIC IN EMOTION, TENUOUS IN...MAKING SENSE [/booming voice of God]. I guess that didn't need to be all in caps, but the excitement consumed me. Lee Anne and I reveled in hours—~~too many hours?~~ NOT ENOUGH HOURS, IT'S NEVER ENOUGH—ogling stationery of all kinds. We share a slack-jawed, glittery-eyed, squeal-enhanced obsession with Asian (mostly Japanese and Taiwanese) stationery. It may never be featured in a museum or gallery or win design awards, but to me it's a sort of art form, visually and linguistically. ""Bugs Popo: He is a a small gentleman. That is not a nose hair but a mustache." Does this not move you?

For all the hours I spent rifling through shelves and bins of letter sets, notebooks, stickers, and more, I didn't actually buy much of it. This stuff only costs a few bucks apiece—what was I thinking? Did my American upbringing teach me nothing? Don't make my mistake; CONSUME EVERYTHING.*

* Just kidding! I do not recommend this at all. Ok maybe a little.

Well, this intro has gone on for too long. I'll get onto the real stuff shortly.

Favorites of 2012: A List of 42 Foods and Stuff

2013-04-25T04:15:00Z

Happy New Year, everyone! 2013 is going to be awesome! Yeah!

...Oh, it's been 2013 for about five months, you say? The year is already a third over? Mmmmk [leans back and flumps into bed, slowly rolls into center of bed, curls knees up to chest, smothers lumpy self with comforter, does not move for five hours]

Yup, I'm slow. But I'm not dead. Yet. And so I shall chug along at the speed of a broken slug, as you've grown accustomed to. (THANKS FOR STICKING WITH ME, GUYS!!!)

If you're wondering what I've been up to during this period of blog abandonment, here's a lil' recap of the last month:

End of March: Visited Istanbul! It was awesome! You can see a few hundred photos on my Flickr page (I still have a few hundred more photos to edit). If I'm not a total failure, I might write about it in six months.
Beginning of April: Got sick immediately after returning to NYC. I spent the first week not being able to taste much of anything. I spent the second week regaining my sense of taste, but losing my appetite. Then my digestive system stopped working at full capacity. "Ima go take long nap. Sorry about the funny poops. Ok bye." I think that's what it said to me.
Mid-April: I entered "gross ball of sweat/phlegm/dizzyness" mode for a few days. At the end my poops upgraded from "nightmare" to "close enough to normal."
Late-mid April: Everything pretty much returned to normal aside from my lungs hurling out the occasional phlegm bomb and my inability to shake off a weird dream involving a huge pink marble toilet—I mean, like a pool-sized thing—featuring raw slabs of meat resting and/or smeared on the seat and dead pigs and various flesh slabs danging on hooks overhead.

You didn't need to know all that, but it's too late now.

Here's my probably incomplete list of my favorite foods from 2012, mostly in New York City, categorized by restaurants, individual dishes, and sweet things.

Restaurants

: Tacos and cemitas, give them to me.

El Tenampa: Thanks to El Tenampa, I rarely eat anywhere else in my neighborhood. I doubt any other place near me could beat El Tenampa's deliciousness-to-dollar ratio. For $6 I can have a two-taco dinner (plus as much guacamole, radishes, and cucumber as I want from their accompanying toppings bar), or if I'm in the mood for getting disgustingly full, I can get a meat-avocado-cheese-n-bean-laden cemita for $8. My favorite fillings are their lengua, cabeza, buche, and suadero, and the well toasted bread and blistered tortillas never disappoint. The only downside is that waits can get long for what's mostly a take-out spot. It's worth it the wait; just don't go if you're in a rush. (If you want someone to help you eat your tacos/cemitas, let me know. I'm like a three-minute walk away from there.) 706 4th Avenue, Brooklyn, NY 11232 (map); 718-369-7508; eltenampadeli.com‎

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SOOOOBAAAAAAA

Cocoron: Cocoron is my favorite soba shop in the city by far. Hell, my favorite noodle shop. The noodles have that hearty, mildly chewy texture I love, the broths and dips have this great clean, pure flavor, and the toppings are...awesome. Yeeaaheloquentnotreally. The cute mascots on the menu don't hurt either. And soba is good all year round: If it's hot, get cold soba. If it's cold, get hot soba. My favorite is the chicken burdock dip soba because it comes with the double poultry whammy of chicken meatballs and chunks of chicken thigh, but every soba dish I've had there—whether hot or cold, dipped or souped—is great. Be prepared to wait if you're going for dinner. I think lunch time is less crowded. 61 Delancey St, New York, NY (map); 212-925-5220; Larger, 2nd location: 37 Kenmare St, New York, NY (map); 212-966-0800; cocoron-soba.com

: Hummus and lamb, bread, and tea. That's a good meal.

Bab al Yemen: If you like piles of hummus topped with spiced, tender lamb nubs and scooping it up with huge rounds of crisp-chewy flatbread and washing it all down with sweet, spiced tea, you will probably like Bab al Yemen. For more info, head over to this post. 413 Bay Ridge Avenue (69th St.), Brooklyn, NY 11209 (b/n 4th and 5th Aves.; map); 718-943-6961; babalyemenrestaurant.com

: Braised goat, rice noodles, and fried pork from Kinshop.

Kinshop: I first ate at Kinshop in 2010 for a Serious Eats review. And like many work-related meals I've eaten at great restaurants, I didn't get as much out of the meal as everyone else. I spend too much time taking photos and then voraciously eating whatever's left over to actually think about what I'm eating. And thus I forgot Kinshop existed for a few years. Only last year when I ate there for my birthday did I realize why my coworkers loved it so much. It's...really...good. It has...the tastes. Lots of em. (Yeah, that's all I've got, it's pathetic.) I've got to go back soon. 469 6th Avenue, New York NY 10011 (b/n 11th and 12th; map); 212-675-4295; kinshopnyc.com

: Muh muh meat.

BrisketTown: Even though brisket is the main deal here, I'm a bigger fan of the super tender ribs. I love the brisket too, though—the fatty cuts that start melting on the butcher paper before you get 'em in your mouth. If the thought of a fat puddle in your mouth grosses you out, go for the lean cuts. For a more complete review, head to Serious Eats. 359 Bedford Avenue, Brooklyn, NY 11211 (map); 718-701-8909; delaneybbq.com

: ...Yup, I'm full.

M. Wells Dinette: I ate at the reincarnated M. Wells for a Serious Eats review with Max and another friend, which is why we felt justified in ordering ten dishes for three people. This would be excessive at any restaurant. It's 500% more excessive at M. Wells, where the menu during our visit included escargot-topped bone marrow, French onion soup that was more melty cheese goo than soup, a brick-like slab of blood sausage, and a pile of Caesar salad generously topped with finely grated parmesan. Considering the caloric heft of the dishes (and, well, deliciousness), the prices are very reasonable. I don't know why I haven't been back yet. At MoMA PS1, 22-25 Jackson Avenue, Long Island City, NY 11101 (at 46th Avenue; map); 718-425-6917 (museum phone); momaps1.org/about/mwells

: Fried chicken. You are so good to me. mentally.

Bobwhite Lunch and Supper Counter: For great fried chicken and sides at a reasonable price, head to Bobwhite. I've only been once so I don't have a whole lot more to say about it, but I definitely want to go back and leave some room for dessert. 94 Avenue C, New York NY 10009 (map); 212-228-2972; bobwhitecounter.com‎

: Meat, meat, pasta.

Perla: I don't have much to recommend since I've only eaten here twice for lunch, but I really liked the beef cheek sandwich and the burger. Pastas were pretty good too, but I can't imagine ordering those instead of big ol' mounds of meat on bread. 24 Minetta Lane, New York, NY 10012 (map); 212-933-1824; perlanyc.com‎

: DOUGYNUTS AND FRIED CHICKEN FOREVER.

Federal Donuts: Imagine a magical place that only specializes in two things: fried-to-order chicken and doughnuts. THIS MAGICAL PLACE IS REAL. IT IS CALLED FEDERAL DONUTS AND IT IS BEAUTIFUL. And it is in Philly, which is good—there ought to be a hundred-mile barrier between me and a place that churns out hot, fluffy doughnuts and juicy, well seasoned fried chicken all day. Skip the fancy doughnuts, which aren't fried to order, and go for the less fancy, cheaper doughnuts. 1219 South 2nd Street, Philadelphia, PA 19147 (map); 267-687-8258; federaldonuts.com‎

: Rice bowls and eggs and things from Robataya NY.

Robayata NY: Kathy recommended Robayata NY to me as a place to fulfill an uni craving (read her review on Serious Eats). And it didn't disappoint: their lunch-only uni and ikura rice bowl is topped with a buttload of creamy sea urchin and bulbous fish eggs. Eating it was like being suffocated by the sea. If you find that prospect exciting, then this is for you. I'll admit I'm not enough of an uni and ikura lover to fully embrace the briny smothering, but I'd eat it again, in the right mood. The stewed pork and tonkatsu lunch specials are probably more up my alley. Other things that Robataya NY has going for it during lunch: a little all-you-can eat section in the back of the restaurant with vegetables, pickles, and hard boiled eggs; all-you-can-eat rice (not that I could finish the rice they give me, but it's nice to know); a calm, skylight-enhanced dining room; and reasonable prices. 231 East 9th Street, New York, NY 10003 (map); 212-979-9674; robataya-ny.com‎

: Rice and things from Donburiya.

Donburiya: I wouldn't go out of my way for Donburiya, but I love that there's a place where I can get shrimp tempura, pork katsu, egg, and rice in the same bowl. Or eel, tofu, and rice. Or tuna, sea urchin, salmon, salmon roe, and rice. I love eating family-style, but sometimes you just want a personal bowl of rice topped with multiple proteins. 137 East 47th Street, New York, NY 10017 (map); 212-980-7909; donburiyanyc.com

Individual Dishes

: Pork gyro sandwich from BZ Grill.

Pork gyro sandwich from BZ Grill: Holy muhfug, this is the best pile of pork I've eaten in a long time. A pita cone excessively filled with slices of moist, tender, crisp-'round-the-edges pork can be yours for under $7. You'll eat the whole thing and feel disgusting and happy. Adam Kuban wrote about this sandwich in 2010 and it took me two years to actually get there. Do not wait two years. Goooooo. 27-02 Astoria Boulevard, Astoria NY 11102 (27th Street; map); 718-932-7858; bzgrill.com

: Pile of arepas de choclo from the Arepa Lady.

Arepas de choclo from the Arepa Lady: I thought I liked the Arepa Lady's arepas con queso more than her arepas de choclo, but after eating too much of both one night (I had waited in line for 90 minutes; I was going to eat the shit out of those arepas), the choclo won. The arepas de choclo are slightly sweet corn pancakes, folded over and filled with cheese. Every bite explodes with corn souls. I don't know how she does it. Corn rarely taste so glorious. The arepas con queso are great too; they're just more cheese-splosion than corn-splosion. Roosevelt Ave and 79th St, Jackson Heights, NY 11372 (map); open Friday and Saturday nights from 10 p.m. to 5 a.m. starting May 1; check twitter.com/arepalady

: Pork ramen from Chuko.

Pork bone ramen from Chuko: I've been to Chuko more than any other ramen shop in the last year mostly because it's right next to Eric's apartment. ...And because it's delicious. Pork bone (tonkotsu) ramen is a common special on their blackboard. The rich, milky broth coupled with a soft boiled egg and meltingly tender slices of fatty pork belly ensures you'll dissolve into a food coma by the end of the night. (This is why it's so great that Eric lives next door. We just go to his apartment and pass out on his couch while watching YouTube videos.) By default it comes with thin noodles, but if you ask for miso noodles you'll get the thicker, wavy noodles, which I prefer. 552 Vanderbilt Avenue, Brooklyn, NY 11238 (map); 718-576-6701; barchuko.com‎

: Pumpkin pizza from Grandaisy Bakery.

Pumpkin pizza from Grandaisy Bakery: I was surprised by how much I liked this, which was a crapload. Note to self: go to Grandaisy Bakery more often. It's one of my favorite bakeries in the city, but I pretty much only go there when I want to feed out-of-towners pizza bianca. 176 West 72nd St, New York, NY 10023 (map); 212-334-9435; 250 West Broadway, New York, NY 10013 (map); 212-334-9435; grandaisybakery.com

: Tokyo fried chicken from Yaya Tea Garden.

Tokyo fried chicken from Yaya Tea Garden: Refer to this post. I've eaten it a bunch more times since writing that post and it's varied in quality, but I still love it. 51 Chrystie Street, New York, NY 10002 (map)
212-226-8803; yayatea.com

: Hot pot from Mister Hotpot.

Hot pot from Mister Hotpot: I only ate hot pot once last year. :C But it was especially good. Mister Hot Pot's non-spicy pork-tastic broth is better than their spicy broth, nice for weaklings like me who can't eat spicy food. Read Chichi's review for real descriptions beyond the lines of, "Uh it was good, yeah." 5306 8th Avenue, Brooklyn, NY 11220 (map); 718-633-5197

: Pastrami Reuben from Katz's.

Pastrami Reuben from Katz's Deli: Considering Katz's pastrami is the stuff of brain-dulling deliciousness on its own, adding sauerkraut, a few slices of Swiss, and Russian dressing seems unnecessary. And it is. And it tastes like the stuff of dreams. Beautiful meat-pile-in-a-sandwich dreams. Read more about the sandwich here. 205 East Houston Street, New York, NY 10002 (map); 212-254-2246; katzsdelicatessen.com‎

: Meat-filled, rice noodle-wrapped crullers from Mei Li Wah.

"Stuffed beef pasta fried fritters" (or beef paste-filled, rice noodle-wrapped crullers) from Mei Li Wah: Rice noodle-wrapped crullers (youtiao) are one of my favorite dim sum dishes. This is like the deluxe version of that. Instead of just carb-on-carb action, it's carb-on-carb action with a core of meat. Ohhhhh yeaaah [bursts through a brick wall]. Read more about it here. 64 Bayard Street, New York NY 10013 (map); 212-966-7866; meiliwah.com

: Baguette from Maison Kayser.

Baguette from Maison Kayser: This is my favorite baguette in the city. That hearty, crackly crust! Those hearty...chewy...breadmeats! (I need to expand my vocabulary. I know.) I would happily eat a whole one on my own. 1294 Third Avenue, New York, NY 10021 (map); 212-744-3100; maison-kayser-usa.com

: Chicken parm hero from Parm.

Chicken parm hero from Parm: Parm's prices are on the high end for parm sandwiches—especially when you can walk a few blocks to Parisi and get a satisfying two-meal sandwich for under $10—but I think they're worth it. A $12 sandwich every once in a while isn't going to break the bank. 248 Mulberry Street, New York, NY 10012 (map); 212-993-7189; parmnyc.com‎

: Roast pork arepa from Patacon Pisao.

Roast pork arepa from Patacon Pisao: This gets some kind of trophy for sandwich awesomeness: crisp fried cornmeal patties stuffed with juicy shreds of roast pork, fried cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, ketchup, and mayo. Let the drool flow. (I ate this at Hester Street Fair, not at the restaurant. I'm not sure if they'll be at the fair this year.) 85-22 Grand Ave, Elmhurst, NY 11373 (map); 718-899-8922; pataconpisaonyc.com

: Chopped liver sandwich from Mile End Sandwich.

Chopped liver sandwich from Mile End Sandwich: Dense liver mashed topped with crunchy gribenes, thick slices of pickled hard boiled egg, thin shavings of pickled onion, duck jus, and parsley salad. I am into that. Read more about it here. 53 Bond St, New York, NY 10012 (map); 212-529-2990; mileenddeli.com

: Salad Jumbo Prawns with Walnut from Amazing 66.

Salad Jumbo Prawns with Walnut from Amazing 66: Take battered, deep fried shrimp, coat 'em in a sweet mayo-based sauce, top with sesame seed-sprinkled, candied walnuts, throw in some cherry tomatoes and melon cubes that have no reason to be there, encircle with broccoli, and...that's Salad Jumbo Prawns with Walnut. I find the sweet mayo-ed crispy shrimp thing surprisingly satisfying and worth the inevitable feelings of grossness. Buuut I I could be totally wrong—someone commented on Max's review that Amazing 66's version sucks. I'm no expert; gimme suggestions! 66 Mott Street, New York, NY 10013 (map); 212-334-0099

: Doner from Mustafa's.

Chicken doner from Mustafa's Gemüse Kebap: This was my favorite bite in Berlin, and in my opinion it managed to live up to some crazy hype. ...Or maybe I was really hungry. But I still think it's one of the best sandwichy things I've ever eaten, especially for the sub-$4 price. Read more about it in this post. Mehringdamm 32, 10961 Berlin, Germany (map); mustafas.de

: PORK CHOPS!

Pork chop birthday dinner in Norway: Last year I visited Kåre in Norway for my birthday. And I arrived...on my birthday. That night, Kåre whipped up pan-fried pork chops with caramelized onions and mushrooms and boiled potatoes on the side. He wanted to take me out for dinner (and he did the next night), but I preferred the homemade route. Kåre, there's no need for you to take me out to fancy dinners, as delicious as they may be; just make me pork chops. [sits back, waits for deluge of pork chops]

: TACO PARTY!

Taco party in Norway: I brought two NYC foods with me when I visited Norway: loads of chocolate chip walnut cookies from Levain Bakery—they travel well and make good calorically-dense gifts—and a few packs of corn tortillas for TACO PARTY WITH FRIENDS. You can buy corn tortillas in Norway, but seeing as the majority of Mexican-ish ingredients in Norway bear the Old El Paso brand (uh huh), I was pretty sure my Brooklyn-born tortillas would be better. We filled 'em with homemade guacamole and salsa, potato hash, pork, corn, sour cream, and sliced radish, and then we filled ourselves with tacos, and then we all slumped over in Kåre's living room like bloated beanbags and lost the ability to communicate anything more complex than moans. It was a fantastic night.

Sweet Thangs

: Brownie sundae from Ample Hills.

Brownie Sundae from Ample Hills: Best brownie sundae I've had in NYC. Hot, gooey, rich brownie + hot, gooey, rich fudge sauce + awesome ice cream melting into everything + hefty plop of thick whipped cream = HERE, TAKE THE KEY TO THE CITY, YOU'VE EARNED IT. 623 Vanderbilt Avenue, Brooklyn, NY 11238 (map); 347-240-3926; amplehills.com‎

: Paris-Brest from Bosie Tea Parlor.

Paris-Brest from Bosie Tea Parlor: I'd never been enamored by a Paris-Brest—a ring-shaped choux-pastry filled with cream—until I tried the one from Bosie Tea Parlor. It tasted like caramel and toasted nuts from MAGICAL RAINBOW LAND as opposed to just regular caramel and toasted nuts from regular boring whatever land. The kind of flavors that turn my words to blubbering gibberish. 10 Morton Street, New York, NY 10014 (map); 212-352-9900; bosienyc.com

: Kouign amann from Dominique Ansel.

Kouign amann from Dominique Ansel: Loads of butter and sugar get packed into a golden, nubbly, crisp-and-chewy, fist-sized nugget of caramelized laminated dough. Methinks the kouign-amann is one of the greatest forms of butter, sugar, and wheat. Dominique Ansel also makes an XL size, although you have to order it in advance. I see a potential birthday treat in my future. 189 Spring Street, New York, NY 10012 (map); 212-219-2773; dominiqueansel.com‎

: Buckeyes by Liddabit.

Buckeyes by Liddabit: I'd never eaten a buckeye before trying the freshly made ones at Liddabit's demo at the Brooklyn Kitchen. I'm pretty sure they can't get much better than these: thin, crisp chocolate shell coating a soft, light, not-too-sweet, peanuty center. I ate too many and felt gross after. I regret nothing. Get the recipe in Liddabit's candy cookbook or try this recipe Liz wrote back in 2010.

: Sundae from Eddie's Sweet Shop.

Two-scoop marshmallow sundae from Eddie's Sweet Shop: In case the photo isn't enough to win you over, here's why I love this thing. 10529 Metropolitan Avenue, Flushing, NY 11375 (map) 718-520-8514; Eddie's on Facebook

: Cookies from Beurre & Sel.

Cookies from Beurre & Sel: Half the reason I love Beurre & Sel is because Dorie Greenspan is one of the sweetest humans on Earth. She will make you feel like a million bucks even though she is sunshine and rainbows incarnate and you are an inferior lump of mortal flesh. The other half is because their thick puck-like cookies are awesome. Mostly awesome. I don't love them all equally, but I recommend the sablé, chocolate chunker, blondie, and jammer. ALL THE JAMMERS. JAMMERS FOREVER. I really love those jammers. Essex Street Market: 120 Essex Street, New York, NY 10002 (map); 917-623-3239; La Marqueta: 1590 Park Ave‎, New York, NY 10029 (map); beurreandsel.com

: Chocolate bar from Eleven Madison Park.

Chocolate bar from Eleven Madison Park: Last year I brought Kåre to Eleven Madison Park for his birthday dinner. Extravagant? Yeeeaaah, a bit. (But I love the guy, so it's ok.) It was the most I'd ever spent on a meal. Disappointingly, I can't put it on my list of "favorite places I ate at in 2012." I knew about the menu changes before I went, but I was still curious enough to try it. I don't regret going—it's not like it was bad—I just don't have much to say about it...nor would I recommend it. (Saying that makes me feel like I was totally unworthy of eating that meal, but eeehh uhhh bluh. I'll note that I was a bit sick during the meal, which surely affected my sense of taste, but Kåre wasn't sick and he had the same feelings about the meal as I did. Bluuuuh.) On the other hand, the complimentary chocolate bar they gave to Kåre for his birthday was goddamn delicious, like the best salted caramel-enhanced Twix bar you'll ever eat. I suppose I'll never get to eat another one.

: Portuguese egg tart from New Flushing Bakery.

Portuguese egg tarts from New Flushing Bakery: The egg custard tarts from New Flushing Bakery could've won my egg custard tart taste test...if the bakery were in Manhattan's Chinatown. The crusts are super flaky, the fillings creamy, eggy, and sweet. It's right by the Main Street subway station, meaning that my visits to Flushing usually end in me picking up an egg custard tart before getting on the train. (This is just one of many awesome things Max introduced me to. THANKS, MAX.) 135-45 Roosevelt Avenue, Flushing, NY 11354 (map)

: Sweets from Yura On Madison.

Banayama Pie and Plum Almond Tart Tart from Yura On Madison: I'm ashamed to say I've never been to Yura On Madison. I've tried their pies on various occasions and they're some of the best pies I've ever eaten. At last year's Serious Eats Pie and Wine Social, Yura brought banayama pies (banana and sweet potato) and plum almond tarts. Both amazing. I should've brought Tupperware with me. I could've made the magic last longer. MY LIFE COULD'VE HAD MEANING. 1292 Madison Avenue, New York NY 10128 (map); 212-860-1707; yuraonmadison.com

: Loukoumades from Telly's Taverna.

Loukoumades from Telly's Taverna: Why is Telly's such an easy choice for Greek food in a neighborhood saturated with Greek restaurants? Because they serve complimentary loukoumades—crisp, light, cinnamon-dusted, syrup-soaked balls of fried dough—at the end of the meal (except on Saturdays). Gee, do you choose the restaurant with free doughnuts, or the restaurant without free doughnuts? THERE IS ONLY ONE CHOICE. I'm not saying fried dough always tastes good when it's free, but these probably do taste better because they're free. I'd pay for them if I had to, though 28-13 23rd Avenue, New York NY 11105 (map); 718-728-9056; tellystaverna.com‎

: Banana walnut bread pudding from Blue Ribbon Bakery.

Banana walnut bread pudding from Blue Ribbon Bakery: Back in college, I called Blue Ribbon Bakery one of my favorite restaurants in NYC. ...And then I didn't eat there for five years. Blue Ribbon Bakery isn't super expensive, but many dishes are, say, $5 more than I'd want to spend on them, which acts as some sort of mental blockade for me and my cheap ass. Also, none of my friends ever suggest eating there. (I'd say that's the main reason, aside from me being cheap.) It took a visit from my cousin Julia, whom I hadn't seen in over a decade, to get me to Blue Ribbon. We shared the banana walnut bread pudding with banana caramel sauce. And it destroyed my brain, replacing it with rainbows shooting out of fluffy, smiling clouds getting tickled by glittery golden rays of sunlight. I don't remember what made it so good. I just remember thinking, "What the...this...good...more...take my money," but less in English and more in garbled brainfarts. I think I liked it even more than when I first ate it in 2006 (warning: my old posts are unedited and some kind of terrible, but maybe also endearing?...I don't know). It costs $14.75, but considering it's for at least two people, that's not so bad. 35 Downing Street, New York, NY 10014 (map; 212-337-0404; blueribbonrestaurants.com‎

: Doughnuts from Peter Pan Donut & Pastry Shop.

Doughnuts from Peter Pan Donut & Pastry Shop: Peter Pan Donut & Pastry Shop is my favorite doughnut shop in the city—alas, a doughnut shop I go to almost never because I'm too lazy to go to Greenpoint. But I've considered waking up stupidly early just to go to Peter Pan and get fresh morning doughnuts. ...Considered it. I haven't actually done it yet. Um. I'll work on that this year. Their doughnuts are worth losing a few hours of sleep over. 727 Manhattan Avenue, New York, NY 11222 (map); 718-389-3676; peterpan-donuts.com

: The Nog from Sugar Sweet Sunshine.

The Nog from Sugar Sweet Sunshine: I'm not sure I will ever contribute something to this world as great as the smushing together of pumpkin cake, egg nog pudding, and whipped cream. Read more about it here. 126 Rivington Street, New York, NY 10002 (map); 212-995-1960; sugarsweetsunshine.com‎

: Apple cider doughnuts from Penning's Orchard & Farm Market.

Apple cider doughnuts from Penning's Orchard & Farm Market: I've had many a disappointing cider doughnut in my life. These cinnamon sugar-sprinkled doughnuts, tender and fluffy on the inside and slightly crisp on the outside, did not fit in that category. I wasn't expecting much from Penning's Orchard & Farm Market, but after I shoved a doughnut in my mouth I was damn glad we bought a dozen of 'em. 161 State Rte 94 S, Warwick, NY 10990 (map); 845-986-1059; penningsfarmmarket.com‎

: Dorie Greenspan's citrus-berry terrine.

Homemade citrus-berry terrine: I ate this dessert twice last year, both times borne forth from Diana's kitchen. It's a recipe from Dorie Greenspan's Around My French Table, basically a boatload of fruit—orange and grapefruit segments along with mixed berries (like ten servings of fruit, if I had to guess)—bound by lightly sweetened, gelatinized orange juice. It's as tasty and refreshing as it is beautiful (my photos is not the best indication of its beauty).

Not Food-Related (Did You Make It This Far?)

: DON HERTZFELDT OMG

While I'm talking 'bout good stuff from 2012, I may as well mention that time I briefly met Don Hertzfeldt after one of his screenings at the IFC Center. The man who so influenced my sense of humor over the last decade. The man who has filled me with that intoxicating combination of mirth and horror over and over in ways no one else can match. The man who showed me the full potential of a thoughtfully animated stick figure—that potential being it can show you THE UNIVERSE. The man who has given me endless joy in the phrases "MY SPOON IS TOO BIG," "MY ANUS IS BLEEDING," "SILLY HATS ONLY," and...oh man, so much more. So much more. (I shouldn't distill him into Rejected, though; the Everything will be OK/I Am So Proud of You/It's Such a Beautiful Day trilogy is suck-all-the-air-outta-my-lungs amazing. Which is super good on the scale of "Will This Kill Me By Suffocation?")

AND I GOT HIM TO DRAW ME A MANATEE. I was totally embarrassed at the time, but I was also powered by selfish fangirl mode, thinking, "ROBYN THIS IS YOUR CHANCE....YOUR ONLY CHANCE...TO GET A DON HERTZFELDT MANATEE. HE PROBABLY DOESN'T WANT TO DRAW A MANATEE. YOU'LL BE THAT ANNOYING GIRL WHO ASKED FOR A MANATEE DOODLE. ARRRGH OH WELL." Thank you for everything, Don. I'll stop now since my words can't do Don justice (also because I don't want to enter the realm of "sounding insane," although I fear I have already drunkenly stumbled across that bridge).

Shopsins' Poached Egg-Filled, Double-Decker French Toast Grilled Cheese Sandwich, You're the Best

2013-03-24T08:17:40Z

I was hoping to finish writing a big roundup of my favorite bites from 2012 before leaving on my trip to Istanbul today. Haha. HAHA. HAHAHA nope, that's definitely not happening.

But before I go to bed and get five hours of sleep, I can write about this one thing I ate yesterday. Look at this sandwich:

: Yeah.

And again:

: Mmhm.

And how about again, because I turned the plate around:

: Yeah.

And this! [points wildly]

: Yeah.

]]> This fantastic breakfast glory pile of bread, cheese, and eggs is the So Good ($16) from Shopsins. They called it the So Good because duh. The beast of a menu describes it as "3D french toast grilled cheese, poached eggs." More specifically, it's a double-decker grilled cheese sandwich made with three slices of French toast thickly layered with loads of oozing cheese. The center of the sandwich gets cored to make room for two perfectly poached eggs, resulting in the bonus prize of a biscuit-sized, crust-less baby grilled cheese sandwich on the side.

: It comes with a small bottle of maple syrup. Perfect.

Do you want salty? Do you want sweet? Do you want cheesy? Do you want bready? Do you want cholesterol? DO YOU WANT TO HAVE IT ALL? YOU CAN HAVE IT ALL!!! BECAUSE FREEDOM AND AMERICA AND STUFF!!!

: Cross section of the baby grilled cheese sandwich.

I don't know the last time I felt so much food joy. A quiet joy. A quiet, food coma-laced joy.

Shopsins
120 Essex Street, New York, NY 10002 (map)
shopsins.com‎

[Not Food-Related] Visiting Istanbul, Got Any Advice?

2013-03-03T06:26:06Z

Everyone I know who's been to Istanbul has said in some form or another, usually with crazed eyes of excitement, "ISTANBUL IS AWESOME AND YOU WILL LOVE IT!" And thus I am going there for vacation from March 25 to April 1 with Diana and Kåre (same travel buddies as last year's trip to Berlin)! Friends have been giving me advice and I have some guide books to study (flipping through Istanbul Eats' book is giving me all the drools) in addition to all these Serious Eats posts, but if anyone out there wants to throw in their two cents about "things you must do in Istanbul," I'd love to hear it. (And while I know this is a big reach, if you live in Istanbul and am interested in sharing a meal, do contact me, please? :D) We're staying in Cihangir, if that helps to know. Thank you for your help!

Hey, Eddie's Sweet Shop, Thanks For Ruining All Other Old Fashioned Ice Cream Shops For Me

2013-03-01T07:51:32Z

UPDATE (3/9/12) Nevermind, Hinsch's isn't closing! (Man, something keeps saving them.) The restaurant is getting a new owner. Read more about it here. ~~Note: One of the ice cream parlors I mention in this post, Hinsch's, is closing for good on Sunday. Yup, the day after tomorrow. :(~~

: Eddie's Sweet Shop, I love youuuu.

Ever since I first tried the marshmallow sundae at Eddie's Sweet Shop in Forest Hills, every other sundae I've tried just can't measure up. The appeal of Eddie's isn't their homemade ice cream—ice cream that's perfectly satisfying—but the sauce it's drowned in. I mean. Look at this disgustingly beautiful thing:

: So much goo.

The thick, gooey, throat-gaggingly sweet (you know, in a good way) marshmallow sauce drips out of the cup like a lava flow. You repeatedly drag your spoon up the side of the cup to catch the excess goo, but it keeps spilling out from the top. The cup appears to be generating marshmallow goo out of nothing. WHAT SORCERY IS THI—nevermind, they just put a shitton of sauce on top. And by "shitton" I mean "just the right amount." Moderation, meet the mighty fist of American gluttony. A fist thrusted by jet packs running on fat and sugar.

]]>

I didn't eat the whole thing by myself. I have—what are they called—limits? And those limits do not extend to eating a whole two-scoop sundae smothered in marshmallow and chocolate fudge sauce (good, thick chocolate fudge sauce), topped with a pillowy mound of thick whipped cream, rainbow sprinkles, and a maraschino cherry all by my lonesome.

...I split it with Max. ...After we had spent the afternoon eating at a bunch of Tibetan restaurants in Jackson Heights. (Queens is awesome, guys. Stuff yourself with Tibetan food for lunch, then stuff yourself with a big ol' American sundae for for dessert.)

: Two-scoop sundae, making a mess all over itself.

I must admit that my next two visits to Eddie's weren't quite as transformative. I think it's because those sundaes were served in a wide, shallow dish instead of a tall cup. The cup sort of funnels all the goo into a smaller area, leading to the Sundae-Looks-Like-It's-Erupting Effect (aka the SLLIEE), an effect that the dish can't achieve to the same degree of awesomeness. Then again, in the dish the sauces cover a greater area of ice cream, which would seem preferable. But in the tall glass, that surface area seems to be translated into the inner sides of the glass getting coated in sauces? Or whatever something muhbluhbluh...

: Jeez, Banana Split, you need a full-body bib.

I MEAN, I JUST DON'T KNOW, GUYS. Maybe the first time was the best because my brain had nothing else to compare it to. Maybe the ice cream scooper on my first visit was more generous with sauce portions than subsequent scoopers. (Not that the subsequent sundaes were meagerly sauced. I think that's a cosmic impossibility at Eddie's.) But next time I go to Eddie's, I'll request a tall glass to see if I enjoy it more that way.

: Stools a-plenty.

The appeal of Eddie's isn't just in their ice cream. It's the charm that oozes out of every wall. Including the mosaic tile floor and the moulded ceiling. And the marble-topped counter. And the wooden swivel stools with their own footrests. And other things I'd attempt to describe if I had a more poetic way to do it. Aarrhgh well [points to photo].

: CANDY.

Oh yes, and the enormous display of candy. (See way more photos of the shop in this Flickr set.) If I were a kid, Eddie's would be the source of all manner of excitement-induced convulsions, possibly followed by brain explosions.

For some history behind Eddie's, check out this article on ForestHillsPatch. The article says the building Eddie's lives in dates back to 1925, and it was first Witt's Ice Cream Parlor before becoming Eddie's in 1967.

: Anopoli Ice Cream Parlor

Eddie's may be my favorite old-fashioned ice cream parlor in the city, but I won't say no to others—such as Anopoli Ice Cream Parlor and Family Restaurant in Bay Ridge. There's a treasure hidden behind that awning.

: Stained glass.

Yup, that's some lovely stained glass signage.

: Finally, paradise is mine.

Inside, you've got plenty of booths and stools to choose from.

: Sami and Laura dig into a "Super Special" sundae.

Our group of four went for the Super Special sundae ($8.95), a pile of three scoops of homemade ice cream, banana slices, marshmallow (sauce, I'm assuming; I...don't totally remember by this point), and wet walnuts completely covered in whipped cream, drizzled with hot fudge, and topped with a single cherry. We may have added on the rainbow sprinkles to enhance the sundae-eating experience. The sundae would've just been naked without 'em, you know?

What looked like a five-year-old's dream was, unfortunately, not so successful with us adults. The ice cream could've been smoother and the whipped cream and fudge could've been thicker and richer. Its most memorable quality was its impressive pile-ness and girth.

But I recognize I'm being nit-picky. Anapoli has been open for over 115 years; they don't have to make the best sundae to succeed. If I lived closer, I'd surely hang out there for sundaes and diner fare. (It's near Bab al Yemen—hit up both places in one night!)

: Am I bold enough to go orange? I don't know. I just don't know.

Maybe I should've ordered their "sensational sweet potato fries." Oh well. I'll just have to imagine what could've been.

For more "Adventures in Great Old Timey Ice Cream Parlor Sign-age," I'd say don't miss Hinsch's—serving the Bay Ridge community since 1946—but you'll probably have to because it's closing for good on March 3. That is, in two days. That is, crazy soon. :(

Update (3/9/12): Hinsch's isn't closing after all; it just got a new owner! I'm not going to edit the rest of my post to reflect this news, just telling ya up front.

: Interior.

Yes, I should've posted this earlier to give y'all a heads up. When I first started writing this post in December (yes, I am the slothiest blogger), Hinsch's land seemed to be doing all right. Then in early January, news broke that Hinsch's was slated to close on March 1 and its space was to become a burger joint. Early February brought some uplifting news that the burger deal fell through and Hinsch's would continue to stay open.

But last weekend, my roommate told me she had just visited Hinsch's and it was for sure closing on March 3.

I thought I should try to make a final visit (which would've been my second visit) before publishing this post. A few friends and I met there on Tuesday night, comfortably before the closing time of 9 p.m. at 7:45 p.m. Some of the lights inside were on. But the normally blazing pink neon sign outside...was off. And the tables...were empty. And the door...was locked. And the restaurant...was totes closed.

...And then we walked to Bab al Yemen and masked our misery in piles of meat nubbin-enhanced hummus and chunks of warm, crusty flat bread, stuffing ourselves until we could feel no more. So it was still an awesome night.

But I'm still kind of bummed. I called the next night to double check their opening hours (still 9 p.m.) and that they were closing on Sunday (yeup). I'll assume they had a good reason for closing early on Tuesday, or maybe it was a slow night and they closed early. Hinsch's had almost closed in 2011 before being taken under new management and undergoing a two-month renovation; it's a shame the revitalized restaurant couldn't last longer. Brooklyn needs ice cream parlors much more than it needs burger joints, but Hinsch's just wasn't economically viable. (On the same block as Hinsch's are Burger King and Five Guys. I'm not sure if a burger deal is still the source of the closing, but if another burger joint moves into that space or if Burger King is taking over, blalarrghguguuhgfflurg stabbitystab either way.)

Well...on to the ice cream, which I've only tried once when I first visited last November. Hinsch's also has a Super Special sundae that's about the same thing as Anopoli's version (or...vice versa?), but since it was just Kåre and me grabbing a snack before dinner (at, yes, at Bab al Yemen, because where else would we eat), we shared a simple marshmallow sundae ($5.50) with homemade butter pecan ice cream topped with marshmallow sauce and whipped cream.

Overall, it was all right. If Eddie's hadn't spoiled me with sundaes suffocated with sauces of all kinds, I might have liked Hinsch's more. I shouldn't fault them for using a perfectly reasonable amount of marshmallow sauce and whipped cream. BUT EDDIE'S HAS TURNED ME INTO A MONSTER. AND NOTHING ELSE WILL EVER BE GOOD ENOUGH.

: Vanilla egg cream.

We also shared a vanilla egg cream ($2.75). I've tried a few chocolate egg creams in my life, each time wondering why I'm not more enamored by this classic soda fountain drink of seltzer, milk, syrup, and no eggs. Turns out I like the vanilla version way more, even if that's less traditional.

Even if I like Eddie's more than Anopoli and Hinsch's, I'd never want places like Anopoli or Hinsch's to close. Sigh. If you get to visit Hinsch's before it closes on Sunday night, let me know how it goes.

Addresses

Eddie's Sweet Shop
10529 Metropolitan Avenue, Flushing, NY 11375 (map)
718-520-8514; Eddie's on Facebook

Anopoli Ice Cream Parlor
6920 3rd Avenue, Brooklyn, NY 11209 (map)
718-748-3863

Hinsch's
8518 5th Avenue, Brooklyn, NY 11209 (map)
855-446-7247; ilovehinschs.com‎

My "Treat Yo' Self" Chinatown Meal: Yaya's Tokyo Fried Chicken & Teado's Ginger Milk Tea

2013-02-25T10:24:11Z

If the phrase "treat yo' self" doesn't mean anything to you, watch this:

(And if you're not familiar with Parks and Recreation, you should watch that, too. You've only got five seasons to catch up on. Piece of cake.)

"Treat yo' self" may be a once-a-year thing in the world of Parks and Recreation, but in my world it's "any time I'm in the Serious Eats office during off-hours by my lonesome, which is many of the times." And my favorite way to treat myself on the cheap without straying far from the office is to walk five minutes to Yaya Tea Garden and plop down $5 in return for one of these babies:

: Chicken pile, come to me.

Tokyo Fried Chicken. It's a simple thing—chicken katsu topped with katsu sauce on top of too little cooked chopped cabbage and too much white rice—but I love it to the point that I've eaten it twice in the last week. The generous two-cutlet amount of chicken is mostly moist, except around the edges where it's most crisp; the rice is well cooked so that each fat, sticky grain is well defined and not too soft and I can easily shove satisfyingly big clumps of it in my mouth; the cabbage provides some vegetable content, allowing me to pretend I'm not totally destroying my health; and it only costs $4.95. That's a good happiness-to-dollar ratio right there.

Since I have trouble eating all the chicken without feeling disgustingly full (and I ignore the sensible option of not eating everything), I've gotten in the habit of asking for more cabbage and less chicken. The last time I asked this (which was, um, last night), the cashier told me, "People usually ask for it the other way around."

]]>

Yaya, outside and in.

Sometimes I also pick up an Asian snack, not so much because I want one, but because it's there. Yaya has a good rotating selection of packaged savory and sweet snacks—chips, puffs, the latest Pocky flavor, and the like.

: THE YAYA KEEPS ON GOING.

Yaya also has a large menu of onigiri (my favorite so far is the shrimp tempura), and as their name implies, tea drinks are their specialty. (Or is that special...tea? Yeah, I went there. It's 4:30 a.m., I CAN DO WHAT I WANT.) But I skip their drinks in favor of grabbing something around the corner at Teado.

: Mm, milk tea.

I usually just get milk tea ($3.25)—you can choose between Earl Grey, jasmine green, osmanthus oolong, or jasmine oolong. For something more treat-like, I'll throw in the extra quarter to get it ginger-flavored ($3.50). Teado's ginger milk tea is strong, spicy stuff that stings your throat a little and has a glorious, sort of earthy smell.

Other reasons I go to Teado, aside from liking their tea: it's run by a young, friendly Taiwanese couple; I've been told their boba is especially good (which doesn't apply to me since I personally don't like boba in my drinks, but it's nice to know); they have one of those coin banks where a cat pops out of a box to take your coins (aka the best way to get me to hand over all my loose change), just one of many quirky decorative flourishes; and I'm somewhat miffed that after two years of Teado being the only bubble tea shop on the block, a Kung Fu Tea shop opened down the street in 2011, probably taking business away from Teado. I know it's not weird in Chinatown to have two bubble tea shops on the same block, but Kung Fu Tea is a growing chain and Teado is a small, independent shop, and blah blah blah bluh blah bluh. Know what I mean? And from what I recall, Kung Fu tea doesn't make ginger milk tea. So whatever.

[...crosses arms, signalling that I have run out of things to say]

Addresses

Yaya Tea Garden
51 Chrystie Street, New York, NY 10002 (map)
212-226-8803; yayatea.com

Teado
145d Hester Street, New York, NY 10002
212-226-7687; Teado on Facebook

Visiting Hong Kong from February 9-15

2013-02-08T10:13:03Z

A heads up to anyone who may try to contact me next week: I'll be even slower at responding because I'll be on a press trip to Hong Kong from the 9th until the 15th. ...And then I'm visiting my dad in Taipei for 1.5 days. I'm coming back to New York on the 17th through Hong Kong. (If you think that sounds like a weird schedule, then yup, it kind of is. When I got the press trip office a few weeks ago, I asked if I could get the return date extended, allowing me to get my own round trip ticket to Taipei, a mere 90-minute flight from Hong Kong. Ultimately, the schedule only allowed for the Taipei leg of the trip to be 1.5 days, but I'm still grateful for it.) I would've mentioned my trip sooner (like, not the same day I'm flying out), but I didn't want to say anything until I received my final itinerary, which just happened yesterday afternoon.

I don't know if I have many readers in Hong Kong (and by "many" I mean like, two people), but I would love to meet anyone who's free and interested in putting a face to this blog. (I know most of you have seen my face, but...have you seen it morphing and breathing and being all congested?! ...Oh yeah...no one wants to see that.) The only problem is that my itinerary is super packed—I'd only be free after 10 or 11 p.m. most days—and according to one of my friends in Hong Kong, most good food places are closed at the start of the lunar new year holiday. So....hm...

I don't really expect anything to emerge from this, but I figured I'd put the message out there. If you want to respond to this message, email me at roboppy@gmail.com (do not leave a comment). Thank you!

(Guys, I swear I have a substantial post that's...almost ready to go. It's 95% written. But that last 5% will probably take a few hours to finish, hours I won't have until I get back from my trip. Yeah, I should get an award for "SLOWEST.")

All right, time for me to get four hours of sleep before heading to the airport.

That Time My Kite Drowned and I Ate A Bunch of Upper East Side Foodstuffs

2013-01-17T08:30:44Z

This post originally took place on August 18 of last year, which was when I started writing it. But I didn't finish it until now. For no good reason.

: This does not end well, but that's ok! Photos of submerged kite taken by Melissa.

Me: Melissa...MELISSA [points out to the Hudson River], THE KITE THE KITE¹

Melissa: [turns to kite] AHHHH NO

Me: OH MY GOD NO GET IT UP CANYOUGETITUP²

Melissa: AHGGHFJKDSJF OH NO

Me and Melissa: AHHHARRGGHHH NOOOOOO³

Diana: [on the phone with me] ...Are you alright?

Me: OH MY GOD OH NO NO NO

Diana: [still on the phone with me] So...I'll head over soon...

Melissa: I'M SO SORRY I JUST LOOKED AWAY FOR A SECOND

Me: AHHH UHH UUGH BLUUUHHGGHRHR

Some annotations to clear things up:

1) Response to seeing my kite flying dangerously low to the Hudson River.

2) Response to seeing my kite flying dangerously lower to the Hudson River.

3) Response to seeing my kite gracefully touching the water's surface, then getting swallowed by the water.

You think flying a kite is all whimsical and fun, until your kite lands into a massive, swiftly moving body of water, and then it makes you realize, "So this is the pure horror a mother feels when she turns away from her only toddler for just a second, then turns back to see her toddler has disappeared. ...Maybe not into a river. That would be much worse. But yeah. It's just like that."

The site of the kite drowning: Pier I off of West 70th Street. I had made Melissa in charge of keeping my kite aloft while I called Diana to coordinate meeting up on the pier. Elsewhere on the pier, Diana had already given her brand new kite a go, but after something like 30 seconds of exhilarating kite flying action it too experienced death-by-river.

"Come over and join us; we've got a kite you can fly!" I assured Diana, turning right to give a nod of acknowledgement to Melissa—at which point I noticed the kite not majestically flying as much as lifelessly falling toward the river's surface, over a hundred feet away.

And then the frantic yelling commenced. Refer to the dialogue above.

But the kite wasn't dead yet. The string was taut; the kite was still attached to it. "We can reel it in!" Melissa suggested ever so optimistically. I like that about her—her beaming optimism in the face of probable doom.

"It'll probably break," I deadpanned.

Melissa helped me reel in the kite, gently pulling as I wrapped the string around the spool. The string held on despite the immense force of the water. Impressive. Maybe Melissa was on to something with that optimism of hers.

We managed to pull the kite all the way back to the pier. Looking over the pier's barrier, we could see the kite "flying" just under the surface of the water, intact and full of potential to ride the skies once more.

"I bet this is where it's going to break," I said. I'll admit that I felt a smidge of a smidge of hope, but I didn't want to show it.

"No, no, this will work! We just have to pull it up slowly."

"I don't know..."

Pulled slowly, we did. We pulled and pulled; the kite felt heavier with each tug.

]]>

In my mind, the kite willingly accepted the grasp of death. The cold, wet grasp.

[snap]

Oh f—

The frantic yelling of watching the kite fall was replaced by dejected quietness. I couldn't remember the last time I felt less thrilled by something not related to a close brush with death (which is evidence of how extremely conflict-free my life is—I know).

: Melissa's kite was uncooperative. :(

It took me a while to realize I overreacted in every way (aside from the initial bout of semi-intelligible yelling; that's just human instinct). Melissa surely felt worse than I did. Not only did her homemade kite not fly—the kite she had been excited to fly for weeks—but she also unintentionally sunk my kite, which I merely bought online and didn't have much of an attachment to.

I'm ashamed that I almost let a kite—a fairly inexpensive one I owned for about four days, not long enough to develop a meaningful bond with it (I heard that happens around day seven)—tear apart my friendship with Melissa. If a friendship doesn't hold up after one friend accidentally drowns the other friend's kite, that friendship wasn't meant to last. (Write that down in your Friendship Rule Book.)

: Kite-making in session.

After I came to my senses, Melissa suggested we make new kites. Thanks to the good folks at FlyNY, as part of their FlyNY Kite Festival they had a kite-making station. More for pre-pubescents than 20-somethings, but whatever. GET OUTTA MY WAY, YOU BABIES.

: Mmm...yeah...ok.

People oohed and ahhed over Melissa's lifelike drawing of a flower-studded branch, effortlessly drawn from the same mishmash of crayons and markers everyone else was using to far less masterful degrees. I'm going to pretend my drawing of Poofy wracked with insanity enhanced her drawing by making it look way better in comparison.

: OH MY GOD IT WORKS. Thanks to Diana for taking photos!

These simple kites flew with ease and managed to avoid drowning. Little did I know how gratifying it is to sustain the flight of a piece of paper that's constantly pulling away from you. ...It's very gratifying. Especially after your first attempt failed.

Also gratifying: all the food we ate while flying our kites. Yeah, there's food in this post! It's just not as fun to write about as the other stuff. Sorry, food. But it was delicious.

: Baguette, I love you.

Melissa and I spent the morning gathering foodstuffs from some of our favorite Upper East Side food shops. The star of the meal: baguettes from Maison Kayser, the first U.S. location of the French bakery chain. I wouldn't go out of my way for the non-bread items at Maison Kayser, but that baguette? Yes, I will go to the Upper East Side just for a baguette. (I live in Brooklyn, by the way. That wouldn't seem very impressive if I lived on the Upper East Side.) Their fantastically hearty, crackly crusts and chewy innards aren't like those of any other baguette I've had in the city. We got the pre-sectioned Epi East Side baguette ($2.75) since it's easier to share.

: Mm, meat log.

To go with the bread: ham from German market Schaller and Weber, specifically lachsschinken. I recommend it if you're looking for a delicate ham. The guys behind the counter are friendly—if you don't know what to get, ask for advice and samples.

: Hello, cheeses and non-cheeses.

Melissa had also brought a hefty gift crate of cheeses, dried fruit and nuts, and other goodies from Murray's Cheese (not part of the Upper East Side crawl). Much Délice de Bourgogne slathering-on-bread ensued.

: Dessert! Must have dessert.

And for dessert, a Brooklyn Blackout cupcake (chocolate cake filled with chocolate pudding and topped with chocolate fudge frosting) and slice of New York-style cheesecake from Two Little Red Hens, one of my favorite bakeries in the city for consistently tasty homey American-style baked goods.

: Kites galore! The red kite is the one Diana bought to replace her kite that fell in the river.

What did I learn after this experience? Flying kites is surprisingly fun! But don't fly kites over water if you can help it. And if you can't help it, don't use an expensive kite, because it might drown. And it's probably best not to fly a kite during a kite festival where you're battling for space with other festival goers, but at the same time it's fun to share the experience with so many people. Even if that experience includes watching your kite drown. You won't be the only one.

: Kite corpse alert. We saw quite a few of these

Addresses

Pier I
In Riverside Park South, 70th Street off the Hudson River (enter from 68th Street; map)

Maison Kayser
1294 Third Avenue, New York, NY 10021 (map)
212-744-3100; maison-kayser-usa.com

Schaller & Weber
1654 2nd Avenue, New York NY 10028 (map)
212-879-3047; schallerweber.com‎

Two Little Red Hens
1652 2nd Avenue, New York NY 10028 (map)
212-452-0476; twolittleredhens.com

My Favorite Restaurant of 2012: Bab al Yemen in Bay Ridge

2013-01-07T05:36:32Z

Happy new year, everyone! All tens of you! I hope everyone was busy over the last few weeks doing fun holiday things. And that no one noticed that I only posted once last month. I blame it on Kåre, who insisted on fulfilling his boyfriendly duties by visiting me over Christmas and New Year's, thus killing my productivity but also giving me all the happiness. I guess that's a fair trade-off. He went back to Norway on Saturday though, which means I'm back to the single life of sitting in front of my computer for 12-hour stretches, only moving for food, water, or elimination of the two. Although I do plan on writing a "best bites of 2012" post at some point, first I'll share a post I started writing in November and then uhhh didn't finish until now.

: Bab al Yemen forever.

Charred rounds of soft-crisp, pizza-sized flat bread. Tender chunks of spiced lamb cradled in a mound of hummus. Bubbling mini-cauldrons of spiced tomato, meat, and vegetable "omelettes" with deeply crusted edges. These are the top three reasons I love Bab al Yemen so very much and why I've eaten there five times since my first visit last September, easily making it my favorite restaurant of 2012.

I don't know anything about Yemeni cuisine besides what I've eaten at Bab al Yemen, so I can't comment on its authenticity. But if all Yemeni food tastes like what I've eaten so far—only a tiny bit of what constitutes Yemeni cuisine—then I've been missing out big time for the last 27 years.

Before you read the rest of my post, I recommend checking out Max's excellent review on Serious Eats first. I mean, that's what I'm doing to give myself a better idea of what to write.

: Colin and Noah, TEAR INTO THE KHUBZ!

First off, that hearty fresh-from-the-oven bread of my dreams. Bab al Yemen's menu just calls it "clay oven bread." My friends and I call it "BREAD I COULD EAT FOREVER, OH GOD YES." Wikipedia and Max tell me it's called khubz. The beautifully charred bread is mostly soft and a bit chewy, thicker in some parts than others, cracker-like where the crust bubbles up and forms air pockets. These generously large rounds come with many of the dishes, such as...

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Hummus and lamb segar

Hummus and lamb segar ($14), the aforementioned "tender chunks of spiced lamb cradled in a mound of hummus." The menu's description: "minced lamb, sautéed with onions, tomatoes, Yemeni spices, dressed with hummus." The lamb is more cubed than minced, and while it's flavorful enough on its own, its better with a thick splodge of creamy hummus cementing it to a chunk of flat bread. As for what "Yemeni spices" are, I'm not knowledgeable enough about spices to identify them from taste alone, but Max says they include cumin, coriander, and cinnamon. Luckily for my intolerance for spicy food, it wasn't hot-spicy. All my visits to Bab al Yemen have been lung fail reaction-free.

: Omelette! Crispy bit close-up and mixed.

Yemeni omelette ($8) is my other favorite dish...so far. "Eggs, ground meat, sautéed diced tomato, scallions, vegetables, and spices served with clay oven bread." This translates into a bubbling mini-cauldron of spiced tomato-lamb-vegetable stew covered with a layer of softly cooking eggs—less like an omelette, more like a heartier version of shakshouka. Let the edges of the egg crisp up (or maybe it'll already be mostly crisped when you get it) before breaking through the yolks and mixing everything together.

: Veggie omelette, a whole different beast.

There's also a light/veggie yemeni omelette ($8), but this isn't nearly as good as the regular one, although it is still tasty. Instead of coming out in a hot mini-pot, it's plated as a neatly domed mound of spiced kidney beans, sautéed onions, tomatoes, and scallions (fasolia?) blanketed with a thin omelette mostly made of egg whites. Considering that crispy bits and sustained heating don't conflict with light/veggie diets, I'm surprised by how different it is.

: Saltah with big ol' lamb chunks on the side.

Our waitress recommended we try the saltah, Yemen's national dish of "root vegetables in a rich lamb soup, served bubbling hot; topped with whipped tangy fenugreek and a side of fresh tomato chutney." It also came with flat bread and our choice of lamb ($17), the other option being chicken. If you find lamb too gamey, you should go with chicken. Because the lamb isn't spiced like the lamb segar, its funkiness is more pronounced, although not too strong for my tastes. Unfortunately, I don't have much else to say about it because...I didn't try the soup. Diana warned me that it was hot-spicy, aka a red flag for potentially giving me breathing failure, so we left it all to Kåre to eat. And eat it all, he did! I did try the fork-tender lamb, though. Good stuff.

Lamb masloog ($17) features more fork-tender lamb, sans spices. The menu describes the lamb as "sautéed then boiled in seasoned mirepoix for hours." Instead of bread, the first-sized chunks of lamb come with rice and braised summer square, potatoes, and okra in a spiced sauce. The moist lamb is great, but I would prefer lamb with more spices à la lamb segar.

: Curry yamaani.

Curry yamaani ($14) is "an almost tiki take on chicken curry with bright, sweet nuttiness from the addition of coconut milk," in Max's words. I'll go with that. The coconut milk-based curry with diced chicken, onions, and tomatoes over rice is light and not hot-spicy, as far as I can remember (or else I wouldn't have eaten it). I'd happily eat it again.

Fattah b'lahm ($17) is better than what it sounds like from the menu's description of "Yemeni croutons soaked in lamb sauce and topped with minced lamb." The "croutons" are chunks of khubz, as far as I can tell, and instead of minced lamb you get hearty lamb chunks, along with potatoes, celery, and other vegetables. There ought to be more dishes featuring soaked bread chunks, in this case, bread saturated with flavorful lamby soup stuff. I may not remember much about what the soup tasted like, but I do remember thinking, "I WANT MORE OF THIS. WHY DOES THIS NOT EXIST IN MORE PLACES?"

: Bread mountain.

For dessert, try the fattah b'tamr ($7). Again, the menu's description of "Yemeni croutons, mixed with dates, and clarified butter" doesn't really prepare you for what you end up receiving: a big ol' mound of khubz crumbs mashed with date bits, clarified butter, and honey, sprinkled with black sesame seeds. It reminded me of energy bars—grain (bread) and dried fruit (dates) mashed together—but non-sucky energy bars that don't taste like cardboard. It's also reminiscent of sticky date pudding. So it's something like sticky date pudding mixed with energy bars. ...Ah...nah, that's not quite right. Well. If you try it, let me know what you think.

We also tried mohalabya/mahalabia ($2.50) and baklava ($3). Mohalabya is a type of milk custard commonly flavored with rose water or orange blossom water and topped with chopped nuts, as far as I can tell from online recipes. I honestly don't remember much about Bab al Yemen's version besides that it was very light and not that sweet. I'd tell you what the other flavors were...if I could remember them. The baklava wasn't bad, but I wouldn't order it over the fattah b'tamr or mohalabya.

: Sweet, sweet tea.

If you're too full for dessert, Bab al Yemen will still finish you off with something sweet by giving you a complimentary pot of spiced Yemeni tea (shai). (You can also order a cup of tea for $1, but there's not much point since you'll get tea at the end of the meal anyway. I just noticed they also serve milk tea though; I've got to get that next time.) The tea works well as dessert because it's crazy—and by that I mean awesomely—sweet. I don't remember everything it's spiced with, but cloves, cardamom, and mint seem to be the major players. I do know there's no cinnamon; we specifically asked about that since Diana's allergic to cinnamon.

: I brought a camera into the bathroom. So what.

Last awesome thing about Bab al Yemen: the teapot faucet in the bathroom. The handle is on the lid! And the water comes out the spout! COME ON, THAT'S NIFTY.

: Table of good things.

Head to Bab al Yemen with a group of friends and you'll eat very well, with very nice service to boot, for about $20 per person.

Bab al Yemen
413 Bay Ridge Avenue (69th St.), Brooklyn, NY 11209 (b/n 4th and 5th Aves.; map)
718-943-6961; babalyemenrestaurant.com

Berlin, Day 7, Part II: Konnopke's Imbiss, DDR Toy Museum, Chocolate, Schnitzel, and the Reichstag

2012-12-03T05:30:14Z

This is the second part of a two-part post; head here for part one. For an overview of my trip to Berlin that took place from April 5 to 12, check out this introductory post. All German translations I've presented are done with Google Translate; if I've written anythphikkling that's wrong, please let me know.

THIS IS THE END OF THE SERIES! YOU ARE NOW RELEASED FROM THIS PRISON! [THROWS CONFETTI]

: Bluh.

Remember that time when I warned you about the BVG messing with your well laid-out plans with service changes? Yeaaaah. Thankfully, the BVG sets out clear signs with directions in English so tourists like me don't curse them forever.

: Konnopke's Imbiss

And so tourists like me can get currywurst at Konnopke's Imbiss.

As far as I can tell, Curry 36 and Konnopke's Imbiss share the title for "Berlin's Most Famous Currywurst Shop." That doesn't mean they're the best, but when you're a tourist with limited time, you do things like eat the most famous something-something.

: An abbreviated menu in English and the full menu in German.

: Currywurst and fries.

Since we had already eaten doner kebabs and desserts that day, Kåre and I shared a wee order of currywurst with fries and mayo (€3.20). While Konnopke's sausage was a bit different from Curry 36's, I couldn't tell you if one is better than the other in meat or sauce quality. They're both crazy cheap, satisfying, and probably health-sucking. I'd give the edge to Konnopke's for having more places to sit and stand, though—an indoor seating area in addition to the outdoor standing tables. Also, their line felt more orderly than Curry 36's mob-like line.

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Fassbrause

I washed it all down with a bottle of Berlin's specialty soda, fassbrause, specifically a Rixdorfer fassbrause. Sweet, fizzy, and fruity (apple-flavored, methinks), it's good for kids and for teetotaling adults. Otherwise, I'm guessing most people would drink beer, which seemed to be about as cheap as bottled water.

Onkel Philipp's Spielzeugwerkstatt

I'd like to believe that most people over the age of 10 walking by Onkel Philipp's Spielzeugwerkstatt (Uncle Philipp's Toy Workshop) would respond with, "HOLY CRAP [points excitedly] LOOK AT THIS FREAKIN' TOY STORE [flails arms] OH MAH GEERRDD," but if that were the case there would've be more child-ness adults in there besides Kåre and me.

But...look at this freakin' toy store:

: Buuuuuh.

My inner five-year-old had a seizure.

Toys attack you from all sides: new and used wooden toys, dolls, model cars and airplanes, puzzles, board games, plush toys, and more. Floor to ceiling, wall to wall, and probably other dimensions undetectable by humans. It's gloriously chaotic and organized at the same time, if that makes any sense. The disorganization didn't feel like neglect, but like a result of a deep appreciation for toys. Or an unhealthy obsession with toys, but I'm pretty sure it's the former. Owner Philipp Schlünemann doesn't just sell toys—he repairs them, too, hence the "workshop" name.

But the definitive sign that this isn't your average toy store lies behind this door:

: DDR Toy Museum

R.I.P.
Spielzeug
der
DDR
*1949
+1989

Slide the tombstone door aside and squeeze through the small opening...

: Stairs/toy shelves

Carefully step down the narrow spiral staircase into the basement...

: Toy overload is happening.

And welcome to Philipp's DDR Toy Museum, open since 2002. Here's some back story from Bates Magazine:

Philipp found himself aggravated by how quickly East Germans were discarding their childhood toys for the more brightly colored and enticing Western toys. "People simply threw away not just toys, but aspects of East German history. So I decided to collect them."

Philipp collected the hell out of those toys. The world is better for it.

Let's keep looking around:

: A shitton of toys in not a lot of space.

: It spins!

Philipp (at least, I'm assuming it was him) sent us into the basement with a remote that controlled a few select spotlights and motors that made some of the toys spin around, such as the toy house in the photo above. Yes, Philipp went all the way with this.

Admission costs €1. Do it.

I must thank Moments of Perfect Clarity for being the Google result for "toy stores in Berlin" that pointed me towards Philipp's.

: Kid's bookstore.

There's a cute kid's international bookstore across the street, Mundo Azul, if you're looking for more kid-friendly stuff.

Fassbender and Rausch

: Fassbender and Rausch

We headed down to Mitte for a quick stop at some touristy chocolate shops. First, Fassbender and Rausch, a family-run chocolate shop and cafe dating back to 1863.

: Chocolate and chocolate and chocolate and etc.

I should note that since I'm not a serious chocolate aficionado—most of my chocolate I eat is everyday Norwegian chocolate since Kåre so lovingly foists a handful of Norwegian chocolate bars on me every time we see each other—I didn't do much chocolate shop research. Fassbender and Rausch is Berlin's most famous chocolate shop, if Google is any indication. Exberliner has more recommendations. The cafe seems to be a big draw, although I didn't have enough time to try it. The store is huge and the prices aren't bad—certainly worth a visit if you're into chocolate or want to look at huge chocolate sculptures. Thanks to sssourabh and Charlene for recommending it!

Ritter Sport's Colorful Chocoworld

A few blocks away from Fassbender and Rausch is Ritter Sport's Colorful Chocoworld. I guess it could be considered the German equivalent of the Hershey's store in New York City, except Ritter Sport's chocolate tastes a bagillion times better. (I'm eating some right now to remind myself. Yup. It's just research.) Some stuff you'll see while squeezing through the mob of customers:

: The design-your-own-chocolate bar counter.
: Cheapo 100-gram chocolate bars for €0.85, about $1.10. (I'm not sure how much the bars usually cost in Germany, but in NYC they're around $2-3. Which is still cheap in my mind.)
: Special edition chocolate.
: Mini chocolate bars a-plenty.
: A tower of gigantor chocolate bars.

Schwarzwaldstuben

: Schwarzwaldenstuben

For dinner, Kåre, Diana, and I went to Swabian restaurant Schwarzwaldstuben to meet up with Berlin-based Serious Eats contributor Conor. He recommended the restaurant when I asked for something German. My reward: schnitzel.

: FRIED MEAT YAY.

Thumbs up for the "paniertes schweineschnitzel mit kartoffel-gurkensalat," or breaded pork cutlet with potato-cucumber salad (€13). I'd be lying if I said I remembered much about it since I ate it almost eight months ago, but I know I liked it. Because fried pork + crisp coating = success. I especially liked the light potato-cucumber salad for its noodle-like ribbons of thinly shaved cucumber.

One of my friends also highly recommended their kässpätzle. Wish I could've tried it!

: Kaiserschmarrn.

We shared their kaiserschmarrn with sliced apple and vanilla sauce (€6) for dessert. These sweet, caramelized pancake bits were better than the version we tried at Schnitzelei, but took an oddly long time for them to make it compared to our other dishes. Not sure if they had forgotten about the order until we reminded them.

: Wostok.

I also tried a sort of local soft drink, Wostok—"sort of" local because even though the company is based in Berlin, it's a revival of a Soviet-era Russian soda called Baikal and its recipe is almost the same as the original. You can read more about it in Dizzy Frinks' interview with the company's creator, Dutch photographer Joris Van Velzen.

The drink's website describes the flavor as "early morning in a pine forest, flavored with a bit of eucalyptus and a hint of Siberian ginseng." I'm sure it was pine forest-goodness in a bottle, but as evidence of my overly stuffed nasal passages, I could hardly taste anything aside from sweet and fizzy. :( I should've blown my nose while drinking it.

: Interior.

Aside from the pancake delay, the dinner was great. Homey, well executed food in a cozy but not cramped space. Thanks to Conor for the rec!

The Reichstag

: The Reichstag.

Our last major stop of the night: the dome of the Reichstag, the seat of the German parliament, the Bundestag. I wouldn't say it's a must-visit, but since it's free, I figured we may as well go. I registered online a few days into the trip and got a reservation for 8:30 p.m. Check out more information here if you want to visit.

Your visit includes a free audio tour. Just make sure you pick the right language. I...did...n't. It definitely would've made the walk up the dome's spiral walkway more interesting, especially when there wasn't much to see outside without the sun's help. I'm glad I visited, though—the dome is beautiful and the night sky made for some interesting photos:

: The dome is open at the top. I'm glad it wasn't raining.
: So many purple seats.
: Goodnight, Reichstag.

A few more snapshots from the night...

: Goodnight, Brandenburger Tor.
: Goodnight, Hotel Berlin, Berlin. It's a large and impersonal hotel, but the service and rooms are nice and it only cost us about $580 for the week.
: Goodnight, Haribo gummies for a measly €0.89 a pack. Don't miss your chance to buy a buttload of gummies. I ended up buying more expensive Haribo gummies at the airport when I realized too late that I had a German vs. American Haribo gummy bears taste test on my hands.
: Goodnight, gay fetish cruising bar.

Addresses

Konnopke's Imbiss
Schönhauser Allee 44 B, 10435 Berlin, Germany (map)
030 4427-765; konnopke-imbiss.de

Onkel Philipp's Spielzeugwerkstatt
Choriner Str. 35, 10435 Berlin, Germany (map)
30 4490491; onkel-philipp.de
Open Tues., Wed., Fri., 9:30 a.m. - 6:30 p.m.; Thurs., 11 a.m. - 8 p.m.; Sat., 11 a.m. to 4 p.m.; closed Mon.

Fassbender & Rausch Chocolatiers
Charlottenstraße 60, 10117 Berlin, Germany (map)
030 2045-8440; fassbender-rausch.de

Ritter Sport
Französische Strasse 24, 10117 Berlin (map)
030 2009508-0; rittersport.co.uk

Schwarzwaldstuben
Tucholskystraße 48, 10117 Berlin, Germany (map)
030 2809-8084; schwarzwaldstuben-berlin.com

Reichstag/Bundestag
Platz der Republik 1 11011 Berlin, Germany (map)
030 2270; bundestag.de

Happy Thanksgiving! Tote Bags and T-Shirts Now Available for Pre-Order

2012-11-23T08:42:48Z

Thanks to Vi Hart, I now know what a turduckenailailenailailduckenailailenailail is: a turkey stuffed with two ducks, stuffed with four hens, stuffed with eight quail eggs. Yup, you want to watch this video.

Happy Thanksgiving! (Yeah, I know it's Friday for most people now, but it's still Thanksgiving...somewhere.) I hope y'all had some fantastic food comas. I got my food coma on mostly thanks to spatchcocked turkey, liver stuffing, and Robicelli's cupcakes. As I type this, my digestive system is turning that awesome food into poop.

...Anyway, as usual, I'm SO VERY THANKFUL that you guys still read my blog every now and then, considering the ever widening gap between substantial posts. Without you, my life would be far more meaningless. My mom doesn't even read my blog. WHY DOESN'T SHE CARE ABOUT ME. (JK, I know she loves the crap out of me. She does keep tabs on my Flickr photostream as some evidence of being interested in my life.)

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The pre-ordering has begun!

I'm also thankful that a bunch of you pushed Maigo's Facebook page over 100 likes! The reward: 10% off pre-orders for my Gimme Pancakes shirts and Round Things tote bags, and free US shipping for orders over $50, from now through Saturday (after Saturday, stuff goes back to the original prices)! Sure, it's not as cool as getting a giant plush manatee on your birthday, but your pre-orders help Christine and me greatly to fund her new business and give us an idea of what products people are interested in so we can bring you more of them! Or...not bring you more of them. But we'd like to bring you more of them.

On an unrelated note, one of my favorite videos I've watched in the last 24 hours (aside from the turduckenailailenailailduckenailailenailail) is this simple animation by Pen Ward (the creator of Adventure Time, my favorite cartoon...and maybe...your favorite cartoon) encouraging peeps in a most sincere way to donate to the LA Game Space Kickstarter. I'm so terribly charmed by it. I would pick out a few choice "charmed" moments, but I'm charmed like every two seconds, so...yeah. I don't know how to explain it.

Pre-Ordering for 'Gimme Pancakes' T-Shirts and 'Round Things' Totes Coming Soon, With Discount (Maybe)

2012-11-20T18:56:39Z

: Head to Maigocute.com for more info.

My doodles are leaping off the Internet and onto your baby! Or your torso! Or your bag of whatever you put in bags!

Yes! It's called clothes and tote bags, everyone's first foray into the world of "printing your stuff on stuff that isn't paper." Thanks to Christine, my former Serious Eats coworker and current awesome friend (people love Christine so much that they cry when she's not around—truth) and newly christened owner of online shop-of-awesome-Japanese-ish-things Maigo, she's getting Gimme Pancake T-shirts and onesies (if you don't know what that bunny is, head here) and Round Things tote bags printed for the holidays!

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YOU CAN LOOK...SOOOO...COOOOOL...UHHH...

Christine will start taking pre-orders on Thursday, November 22, until midnight on Saturday, November 24, but she's running a promotion until midnight (PST) on Wednesday to give you a discount during the pre-order period (orders afterwards will be regular prices): The more "Likes" she gets on Facebook, the more she'll discount the prices. Goes a little something like this:

100 Likes = 10% off
150 Likes = 20% off
250 Likes = 20% off + Free shipping on all orders (including non-Roboppy products) over $50 for domestic US orders

Here's Christine's handy price chart:

Product	Price	10% off	20% off
T-Shirt	$24.00	$21.60	$19.20
Girly T-Shirt	$24.00	$21.60	$19.20
Toddler T-Shirt	$18.00	$16.20	$14.40
Baby Onesie	$18.00	$16.20	$14.40
Tote Bag	$15.00	$13.50	$12.00

I'm pretty sure we can at least hit 100 likes. (I mean, if you actually like her site. I'd say you should, but I don't want your "like" to be full of liiieees if you're not into cute Japanese fabric and washi tape and such things. It's ok. [pat pat]) I don't think I have as much influence as Christine thinks I have, but we're not too far from 100 now, so...yeah. CAN YOU DO US A SOLID, INTERNET READERS?

: UPDATE 11/21/12: Here's the latest version of Round Things, updated from the tote bag mock-up. The bag is on the light yellow side, so we're taking that color out and adding white.

I must admit that I kind of cheated with these first two designs. The Poofy Pancakes design is the exact same one I used back in 2006, and the Round Things design is a very cleaned-up version of a crappy drawing I also made in 2006. But without Christine's help, I would've never gotten this stuff off the ground, no matter how many times people asked me, "Hey can you make more pancake shirts?" to which I'd respond, "YeaahhuuhhhumIdunnoooo ohwhomIkiddingprobablynot manI'vegottastopbeingsolazybluh." (Man, I'm a jerk.)

So, thank you, Christine, for doing the dirty work!

We don't have any other products in mind at the moment, but we'll do more if this goes well. And I hope it does, because I want Christine to eat food and not go broke.

Thank you to everyone who helps us out (and has been helping us out on Twitter and Facebook)!

Berlin, Day 7, Part I: KaDeWe, Mustafa's Gemüse Kebap, and Konditorei Buchwald

2012-11-10T23:55:12Z

For an overview of my trip to Berlin that took place from April 5 to 12, check out this introductory post. All German translations I've presented are done with Google Translate; if I've written anything that's wrong, please let me know. I AM ALMOST DONE WITH WRITING ABOUT THIS VACATION, I SWEAR.

: Some snapshots from the day.

And on the seventh day, Robyn tried to do all the things, which ended up being impossible, but she made sure to eat doner kebap and some cake and some schnitzel.

The problem with not planning aggressively for a vacation is that on the night before your last full day you might realize, "Crap, I still haven't done these 20 other things I wanted to do." And thus you spend that night figuring out how to smush all of those things into one day, basically writing the plan you should've written before your vacation began. You figure out how many minutes it takes to get from one place to the other, and you write out the subway stations (along with termini and transfers) and addresses of every place you're going to, and you make a schedule that you'll inevitably be unable to stick to. But it's mostly successful.

First stop: KaDeWe.

KaDeWe

: KaDeWe. You can't miss it. It's huge.

I'm not much of a shopper, but I love department stores—as long as the department store has a bitching food hall. What am I going to do with non-edible things? Eat them? What's the point? What has non-edible ever done for me? Case closed.

And that's why I, alone with most other people who like to eat food, put KaDeWe on my "must visit" list. The 105-year-old luxury department store KaDeWe—short for Kaufhaus des Westens, "Department Store of the West"—is Europe's second largest department store (after Harrod's in London) and boasts 645,000 square feet of stuff you can buy. Out of its eight floors, the top two floors are dedicated to food, although the seventh floor is really where it's at (the eight is a 1,000-seat wintergarden). Here's where you'll find grocery items from all over the world, fresh produce, meats, and fish, wine, cheese, tea, baked goods, baking mixes, candy, chocolate, snacks, jams, pastas, soups, prepared food stands, and more and more and more.

I wasn't planning to buy anything; I was mostly interested in seeing what a luxury department store stocks to represent food from around the world, like curating a museum of modern food. What products would make the cut?

: AMERICA THE BEAUTIFUL.

Pop-Tarts! Swiss Miss! Fluff! Marshmallows! Jolly Time! Snapple! Peanut butter! THIS IS (THE UNITED STATES OF) AMERICA, FOLKS.

]]> Yup, I love seeing what American products trickle into other countries, how America is defined in a limited amount of shelf space. I don't have anything analytical to say about the subject, but I'm sure someone has already written that research paper. "Fluff, Pop-Tarts, and Peanut Butter: How American Processed Food Products Define the American Identity Outside the USA."

: Chocolate! So much of it!
: Candy! So much of it!
: Tea! So...much of it...
: And for some reason I took a photo of the matzoh section.
: A few of the food counters.
: Shelves by the escalators.
: Fancy-pants ground floor: You do nothing for me.

I didn't take many photos in the store, although on retrospect I wish I had. I could've taken an extra hundred photos with no problem. But since I only gave us less than half an hour to browse the store—hours would've been more appropriate—it's probably a good thing I speed-browsed.

DoubleEye

: DoubleEye

Before heading to lunch, we stopped by DoubleEye, a highly rated coffee shop recommended by one of Diana's friends. This stop was just for Kåre; being the uncultured, uncaffeinated heathen that I am, I don't drink coffee (or alcohol; I can't handle the flavor of pois—I mean, extreme bitterness). I waited outside as he grabbed a little cup of his most favorite brown liquid, along with a pain au chocolat.

And then it was time to revisit our old friend from two days prior...

Mustafa's Gemüse Kebap

Mustafa's Gemüse Kebap, famous for being one of the best (or the best) places to get a doner kebab in Berlin. You evaded us once, but not again. The line, while ever-present, was much shorter than during our last attempt, and we only had to wait about 20 minutes to get our food.

: Mounds of vegetables, yessss.
: Shaving a rotating meat column with a knife the length of my arm, yessss.
: Another view of the rotating meat, looking flayed on this side, but probably nicely browned on the other.
: A peek behind the counter.

Kåre and I ordered the same thing: the hähnchen döner mit gemüse (chicken doner with vegetables; €2.90, about $3.70). On retrospect, I made a dumb choice. I could've ordered the menu's grand total of three items for about $12—in addition to the chicken doner, a vegetarian version, and a chicken (or vegetarian) dürüm wrap. (Okay, this is actually four items, but I'd just go for the chicken dürüm.) Obviously, we should've ordered all three of them. Considering that I've been working at Serious Eats for five years, "order everything on the menu" should come naturally to me by now. My lapse into moderation disgusts me. And who knows when I'll be back in Berlin. I don't. :(

: Twin doner!

If only I had known that my reaction to the sandwiches would go a little something like this:

: Animated gifs. Am I doing those now? I mean. This one is pretty damn good. Yeah.

And the source of such joy:

: More photos. Because you want them.

I should point out that that was my first time eating a doner kebab. I've eaten gyros before—which seem to be the closest popular thing we've got in the US—but rarely. As my introduction to the world of thinly sliced rotisserie meats stuffs into bread with other stuff, it was glorious. Someone who's eaten many a doner in their life may disagree, but that person isn't here right now, so deal.

Let's start with the bread—a thick flat bread, like a...fat pita. (I know that's a bad description. It's not quite a bun, nor the kind of pita I'm used to. It may be a kind of typical Turkish bread, but I'm not familiar enough with Turkish cuisine to know. Yeah, just look at the photo, that's easier.) A good toasting in a sandwich press results in an even, light crunch on the outside that contrasts nicely against its soft innards. Within the bread is a layer of chicken shavings, tender and crisp in some areas, piled with what would make for a memorably fresh salad on its own: lettuce, red cabbage, tomato, onion, carrot, roasted red pepper, some thick slices of fried potato (that had gone mushy by the time they met my mouth), and a crumbled feta-like cheese (or maybe it is feta, I'm not sure). The internet tells me it also gets a squeeze of lemon juice on top. There's some kind of sauce smeared into the bread and the chicken is spiced with something, but I don't remember much about either. I just remember the overall feeling of, "Damn, this is good. Yeah. Wait, I want this all the time. Wait, this is one of the best sandwiches I've ever eaten. There's no way that all other doner are like this one."

: It's worth the wait.

Not having eaten other doner, I'm not the right person to make the following comparison. ...But I will. I left with the impression that Mustafa's role in Berlin's doner kebab-sphere is like Taim is to New York City's falafel pita sandwich-sphere. In a city with too many places to get falafel, Taim excels in pretty much every way with fresh ingredients, great recipes, top notch frying skills, and knowing how to construct a sandwich that's balanced in every way. Yeah, that's all. In a city similarly overrun with doner kebab, Mustafa's gave me the same vibe, the vibe that said, "We're exceptionally better than most of what you'll find in the rest of the city." Fresh, flavorful, well balanced ingredients, stuffed into some good bread. It sounds simple, but my sandwich-eating history tells me it's not.

So...that was the best thing I ate on my trip. Thank you to jc, Chungwan, and Clarisse for the recommendation!

Konditorei Buchwald

: Konditorei Buchwald

With the savory out of the way, it was on to sweets. We met up with Diana at Konditorei Buchwald, a 160-year-old bakery and cafe famous for their Baumkuchen, literally named "tree cake" after the way its layers resemble the growth rings in a tree trunk. If cute, old timey bakeries charm your pants off, then get ready to lose those pants. Or just don't wear pants. (But wear an appropriate pants replacement. I'm really only saying this to Fart Sandwich, who is probably not reading this post. Or is he.)

: Dining room.
: BAKERY CASE, YAY.

Aside from Baumkuchen, they make streusel cakes, tarts, cheesecakes, chocolate cakes, mousse cakes, and more, all for very reasonable prices.

: Himbeer-Sahnetorte

Diana's Himbeer-Sahnetorte (raspberry mousse cake; €2.80 to go/€3.30 to stay) was the most impressive. A tall layer of light, tart raspberry mousse on top of what I'm guessing is a sliver of chocolate cake, topped with a thick layer of whole raspberries suspended in gelatin. Diana liked it so much she tried to find a recipe for it when she got home.

: Tarte Citron

Kåre's Tarte Citron (€2.80/€3.30) was also good. I don't remember much about it from the one bite I took, but I'm know Kåre enjoyed it since lemon is his favorite flavor for anything sweet.

: Zimt-Apfeltorte

And then there was my Zimt-Apfeltorte (cinnamon apple tart; €2.30/€2.70), a sort of double-crusted apple pie that was far more delicate than what I'm used to at home. Unfortunately, it ended up being the worst thing to get in my condition of perpetually swollen nasal passages. While Diana's and Kåre's desserts had punchy tartness to blow through my senses, the flavor of cinnamon is pretty nonexistent if you can't fully smell it, and the apple bits didn't carry much weight without the cinnamon. (If you're wondering how I tasted anything during the trip, I don't know. Some flavors definitely made their way to my brain.) There were also chopped peanuts in there, which added...crunch. I'm sure the tart would taste great to a person with competent olfactory organs. I just wasn't that person.

: Baumkuchenscheibe

I did better with a slice of Baumkuchen (€2.50/€2.90). It's not a dessert that will stick with me forever, but it's a perfectly satisfying plain cake, with a good dose of butter and eggs. (...Now that I've written that out, I want one. Due to Baumkuchen's popularity in Japan, you can usually find packaged slices of Baumkuchen in Japanese supermarkets, and sometimes Chinese ones.)

: Tea and dessert; we should do this more often.

: Don't forget to buy some Baumkuchen for the road, from a single slice to quintuple-layered. They come in chocolate-covered, too.

Many thanks to the anonymous reader for the recommendation! We all loved the bakery and could've spent hours there, but Diana had more plans, and Kåre and I had to go to second lunch. You know, the natural successor to first dessert. More of that coming up in Part II.

Addresses

KaDeWe
Tauentzienstraße 21, 10789 Berlin, Germany (map)
030 2121-0; kadewe.de

DoubleEye
Akazienstraße 22, 10823 Berlin, Germany (map)
0179 4566960; doubleeye.de

Mustafa's Gemüse Kebap
Mehringdamm 32, 10961 Berlin, Germany (map)
mustafas.de

Konditorei Buchwald
29 Bartningallee, 10557 Berlin, Germany (map)
030 3915931; konditorei-buchwald.de

Germany, Day 6: Moritzburg or Bust (By Way of Dresden)

2012-10-11T06:24:15Z

If you're thinking, "Hey, haven't you been writing about your trip to Germany for like the last five months?" the answer is yes, followed by a sigh of failure. BUT I'M STILL CHUGGING AWAY! I WILL CHUG UNTIL I FINISH/DIE. For an overview of my trip that took place from April 5 to 12, check out this introductory post. I'm a total noob when it comes to Berlin and German history, and all German translations I've presented are done with Google Translate; if I've written anything that's wrong, please let me know!

: This looks sort of abandoned.

The outdoor train platform in Falkenberg featured an abandoned-looking food stand. This seemed worse than having nothing. "Nothing" could say, "This is a small, quiet town," while "abandoned something" could say, "This is a small, quiet town...where murders happen. And feeding people who were about to die felt unsettling, so we put an end to that. The feeding, not the murders."

But not long after I pondered this highly improbably situation, life appeared. And the life was friendly. And came bearing cameras.

A group of football fans approached Kåre (boyfriend), Diana (longtime friend), and me (me), asking if we could help them take their photo. They had stopped in Falkenberg on the way to their respective homes from a game between Energie Cottbus, their club of choice, and Hansa Rostock. ...A game we later found out Cottbus had lost, but we couldn't tell from the group's smiles and cheers.

: Paul and his didn't-cost-a-buttload ticket. [Photograph: beatsinthebox]

After we got settled on the train to Berlin, we recognized one of the fans as he walked into our car. Rather than wave and keep on walking—which is probably what I would've done because I'm unreasonably afraid of most humans—Paul was too friendly to ignore us, and he sat across the aisle for a good chat. A chat that included being told about the metric buttload of euros we would've saved if we had bought unlimited train tickets instead of single use tickets. Oops.

Our lives would be pretty much the same if we hadn't become friends with Paul, but I can't help laying out the trail of "ifs" that helped make it happen. (I'm speaking as someone who almost never makes friends with random people I meet in real life. Because I am made of the aforementioned fear.) If we had decided to go to Dresden on another day, we wouldn't have met him. If we didn't leave Dresden when we did, we wouldn't have met him. If Paul's friend hadn't wanted to take a different route after the game, Paul wouldn't have ended up in Falkenberg. If more people had been on the train platform, we may not have ended up taking the group photo. If we had been sitting in a different car, Paul may not have passed us. And so on and so on and so on.

So while Falkenberg isn't where anyone would want to be at 10 p.m. on a Tuesday night, I'm glad our four-hour train ride from Dresden to Berlin brought us through there.

Moritzburg

Come along and let me show you the sights of Moritzburg!

: Schloss Moritzburg

...Ok, I'm done. [dusts off hands]

Well. There's more than that, but that's the most famous thing in this picturesque village of 8,300 people. And a baroque palace on a man-made island surrounded by a lake is quite a thing—hence why, at Diana's suggestion, we took a 30 minute bus ride from Dresden to get there.

]]> I'd regale you with interesting historical bits about the palace, but I couldn't dig up much about its history. If you're really curious, you can read about it yo'-fine-self and allow me to be lazy. The super-duper short history of the palace is that it started off as a hunting lodge in the mid-1500s and continued to be a favorite hunting spot for hundreds of years, as evidenced by its most striking feature...

: Photos aren't allowed in most of the palace, but Diana snuck in a sweet photo.

...Its collection of red deer antlers, described as the largest collection of red deer antlers in the world, although I can't find an exact number (how large is the world's second-largest collection of red deer antlers?). If I had to estimate, I'd say a few hundred. Deer heads are propped up all over the palace, whether thoughtfully arranged such as in the photo above, or just stuck wherever one seemed to fit because they just have too damn many of 'em. I'm somewhat sure I saw a few heads simply laid on the ground.

: Somewhere inside, but outside the "NO PHOTO" zone of ~~death~~ scolding.

If you find the vacant stares of fake deer heads unsettling, get ready for nightmare-fuel. Otherwise, it's pretty awe-inspiring. I doubt I'll ever be faced with such imposing walls of deer heads again.

Another impressive display of "stuff made of animals" is the Feather Room featuring intricate wall hangings and bed curtains made of woven feathers from all kinds of birds.

I must admit that the palace's opulence partially suffocated my awe. I know opulence comes with the whole "royal palace" package, but instead of appreciating the craftsmanship and artistry that goes into, say, gilded deer heads and floor-to-ceiling murals and gold flourishes all over the place, my brain chose to schloop into a state of "Bluuurrgghghfffsffzz." (That room isn't representative of the whole palace—it's just one that stuck out in my mind.) It's times like this that my lack of refinement really shines through.

Schloss Moritzburg's other claim to fame, aside from being awash with deer heads, is being the backdrop of the 1973 Czech-German movie Tři oříšky pro Popelku (Three Gifts/Nuts for Cinderella). It's a holiday classic in many parts of Europe where the movie is played every year around Christmas, like in Norway where I first watched it last Christmas. For Kåre, it's a holiday classic the way that Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer is for me. If you have 75 minutes to spare, you can watch an English-narrated version on YouTube (split into 10 parts).

In this version of Cinderella, Cinderella get the attention of the prince with the help of a guardian owl and three magical wish-granting hazelnuts...and because she's an exceptional archer and equestrian...and because she's got 'tude...and because she's 500% more beautiful than everyone else in the village...and because every other woman bores the prince. She plays hard-to-get with the prince and then blah blah blah stuff happens and THEY LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER, WHO'DA THUNK IT. It's a sweet movie with the lovely backdrop of snow-covered Moritzburg—which is why in the winter, Schloss Moritzburg caters to the movie's fans with an exhibit about the movie and movie screenings. (The palace's Facebook page is decked out for the occasion.)

Since I wasn't allowed to take photos inside, I took a bunch outside. Here ya go.

: Antlers.
: Back of the palace.
: Further behind the palace.
: Me and Kåre jumping behind the palace because...we can.
: Side view.

After about one and a half hours at the palace, we headed back to Dresden for a quick walk-through from Neustadt station to the central station. The city definitely demands more than a few hours of your time; it's too bad we didn't have more to spare. Admittedly, since I had done almost no research before visiting (Diana did most of the planning; thanks, Diana!), I didn't know what I was missing out on. ...And thus I'm now looking at dresden.de so I can see all the stuff I missed. If I had had more time, I would've loved to have visited the German Institute for Animated Film. Also, Pfunds Dairy, "the most beautiful dairy shop in the world."

And so, um, I don't have much advice to give about Dresden. But I can show you photos.

: The River Elbe.
: ...I'm not sure what this building is. Do tell me.
: Let's be tourists. It's ok.
: Katholische Hofkirche, built in the mid-1700s.
: Dresden Castle.
: The Fürstenzug (Procession of Princes), a 101-meter-long mural made of porcelain tiles featuring "35 margraves, princes and kings as well as 59 scientists, artisans, craftsmen and farmers."
: An entrance...
: ...And the dude who watches you as you enter.
: Oh good, he let us through.
: The Langer Gang (Long Arcade) in the Stallhof (stall courtyard).
: YOU CANNOT ESCAPE DEER HEAD.
: Back to the street.
: Dresden Frauenkirche, looking rather spic and span because, in a way, the 18-century church is only seven years old. The church, along with most of the area around the Neumarkt, was destroyed during the bombing of Dresden in WWII and have only been rebuilt/restored in the last ten years or so. Reconstruction for the Frauenkirche began in 1993 and was finished in 2005 to the tune of €180 million.
: Baby windows to momma windows on a new building in the Neumarkt.

Is it dinnertime yet? HOORAY!

: Freiberger Schankhaus

For dinner, we took the easy way out and plopped ourselves down at Freiberger Schankhaus right in the Neumarkt, aka "heavy tourist territory," aka "where food has no obligation to be particularly good or wallet-friendly." But it wasn't bad at all, nor unreasonably priced. If you don't have the time or inclination to look for something better, you'd do fine at Freiberger Schankhaus. assuming you want German food.

: Roasted pork knuckle.

And I did. Oh yes. Roasted pork knuckle, we meet again. This massive meat hunk is only a half-order, yours for a reasonable €9.70 (about $12.50; a full portion is €13.90).

: Pork and bread.

The knuckle comes on a bed of sauerkraut in a pool of "Freiberger beer sauce," with Treber bread (spent grain bread) on the side.

: Skin close-up.

The skin was fantastic: deeply golden, pustuled, powerfully crunchy. But the meat didn't fare as well.

: Meeeaat.

If you're thinking, "Man, that looks kind of dry and stringy," then you, right. It wasn't all dry, but some of it was.

: Fatto.

On the opposite end of the pork knuckle constitution spectrum, you've got fat chunko.

: Boba Q

We followed dinner with bubble tea at German chain Bobo Q, the most "I'M TRYING TO BE HIP AND MODERN OR SOMETHING" bubble tea joint I've ever seen, largely due to one wall being occupied by a brightly colored display animated to pulsating dance music.

: "BUBBLE TEA FOOD FOR YOU!"

Admittedly, the hip-ness was sort of broken with this poster. Engrish, I will never get tired of you.

Boba Q was also distinct for being the most white people-filled bubble tea joint I've ever been to. Not that there's anything wrong with that. It's just new to me. Even though New York City has loads of bubble tea shops, they're mostly in areas with large Asian populations (Chinese, to be more specific), mostly staffed by Asians serving a mostly Asian clientele (and I'm guessing that's what it's like in most of the US). Boba Q didn't fit any of these categories. Bubble tea seems to have wider appeal in Germany, or is attempting to, if the poster above is any indication, ignoring that the poster isn't especially appealing.

: Menu

The menu is in Chinese in addition to English, in case any Chinese-speaking people do wander in here.

: Toppings galore.

Even though they offer a wide variety of "toppings" (bottomings, more like)—boba, popping boba, and jelly in different flavors—I went the boring route with a no-topping, perfectly fine taro latte (€3.30).

: Indian!

Oh god, what is Helly Kitty wearing?...oh, nevermind, copyright infringement.

: People with canes are especially welcome.

I added more photos to my crosswalk signal collection. Achievement unlocked.

: Shopping and shopping and train.

After walking through a grand shopping/hotel area that lacked all the charm of the old city, we reached central station, bought some overpriced train tickets, and made our way back to Berlin.

: Knusper Flocken

On the ride back, I popped open a bag of Knusper Flocken I had bought that morning. I was curious about it since it was a popular East German candy—check out a photo of the no-frills, barely branded GDR packaging at nosztalgia.net—that disappeared after the fall of the GDR but came back into production in 1995. Knusperflocken, which Google translates to "crisps" or "cereal chips," are little star-shaped nubs of milk chocolate mixed with finely ground knäckebrot, or crispbread. Crispy chocolate—sounds promising!

But no. One chew later I discovered it's not crispy chocolate. It's gritty chocolate lacking any evidence of smoothness or creaminess. That's a fail, although I guess it tastes like what you'd expect from the GDR. I think it's one of those things you have to grow up with to appreciate, as this German blogger illustrates.

Moritzburg and Dresden (and our beloved Falkenberg) is a lot to cover in one day, but with our week-long vacation that was all we could afford. Hopefully you get more vacation time. If you don't live in the U.S., you probably do. Ha ha ha! ha ha. (I'm quite aware how privileged I am just to have a job I like; I'm not sure I deserve more vacation. OR IS THAT JUST WHAT THE U.S. WANTS ME TO THINK?)

Lastly, I will leave you with this barely related thing that surely deserves more attention. While looking up info about Dresden, I came across the most peculiar review of Dresden Hofoper (opera house) on Google+. It's easily the best review of anything I've ever read on Google+, which isn't saying much since I rarely read Google+ reviews. ...But anyway. I hope you agree:

So, I hatched what I figured was a fool proof plan. I don't have a lot of money, and I had a lot less a number of years ago. In fact, at the time I visited Semper Opera, I had more children than dollars. And I had one child. So, you know, do the math. Okay, I will do the math for you. I had less than one dollars. Which, comes out to around no dollars, roughly, and really a lot less when you consider my looming student loan debts, which only increase with time. So, me and my baby and no money go to the opera. Or, not so much the opera itself but this alley behind it. Anyway, I drop my kid into an open window and run. I figured, you know, that the opera people, whoever they are, would feel pity and take the baby under their wings, though obviously they don't have wings, a fact which has become much clearer to me over the years. I write letters now to the opera, but I haven't gotten a reply from my daughter yet. I've received a number of brochures and event schedules, all of which look fantastic, though after going over them in detail I can assure you that none of the performers is actually my daughter. So, the take-away here is, if you go to Semper Opera, and you happen to find a baby, just you know, give me a buzz. Or, at least, give it a job.

Addresses

Schloss Moritzburg
Schloßallee, 01468 Moritzburg, Germany (map)
035207 8730; schloss-moritzburg.de
Getting there from Dresden-Neustadt station takes about half an hour by bus. The ticket is €3.80 each way and you can pay on the bus (#326; timetable at vvo-online.de). It plops you close to the palace, but the bus stop to go back to Dresden is sort of hidden behind a parking lot, at least when we were there. We went to the nearby tourist office to find out where the stop was. ;_;

There's also the Lößnitzgrundbahn, a train line that goes by Moritzburg.

Freiberger Schankhau
Neumarkt 8, 01067 Dresden, Germany (map)
0351 5004347; freiberger-schankhaus.de

Berlin, Day 1: Dessert for Lunch, Sandwich for Snack, Schnitzel for Dinner
Berlin, Day 2: Three-Hour Guided Tour, Ice Cream at Fräulein Frost, and Dinner at Hasir
Berlin, Day 3: Computer Game Museum, Ostpaket, Humboldt Box, Berlin's Oldest Restaurant, DDR Museum
Berlin, Day 4, Part I: Sachsenhausen Concentration Camp
Berlin, Day 4, Part II: German Tapas, Schnitzel, and Chipped Pancakes at Schnitzelei
Berlin, Day 5: Curry 36, Pergamon Museum, and Swabian Food Overload at Die Feinbäckerei

Some of My Most Favorite Things Ever: Sugar Sweet Sunshine's Trifles and Puddings

2012-09-17T04:46:18Z

: :D

My usual response to ice cream: "Yaaaay, ice cream!"

: :D

My usual response to pudding: "Yaaaay, pudding!"

: :D

My usual response to cake: "Yaaaay, cake!"

: :D

My usual response to cookies: "Yaaaay, cookies!"

: :D :D :D :D

My usual response to trifle: "AHHRRRGHR AGRHHFGHF FF [cue dribble of drool] AHHH LLLAAAHHHVE YOUUUUUUU THE WORLD IS SO AMAZING!!!"

]]> I might be slightly overplaying the trifle response and slightly underplaying the others, but it's something like that. If you're a fan of trifles, then surely you agree with my harmlessly insane reaction to the simple mashing-together of cake + pudding + cookies + whipped cream in various combinations, combinations that reach a greatness their individual components could only dream about reaching on their own, if they were capable of dreaming.

[Somewhere, a single tear rolls down the face of a chocolate chip cookie, sitting a moonlight-bathed window. ...Cue "Somewhere Out There."]

I'm not talking about traditional English trifles (not that there's anything wrong with 'em), but the trifle-inspired desserts at Sugar Sweet Sunshine, one of my most favorite dessert spots that I shamefully haven't blogged about since 2010. THE SHAME. IT CONSUMES ME.

Here's a belated "thank you so much for existing" post dedicated to some of my favorite desserts.

: THE NOG!

After nearly seven years of shooting trifled-derived sugar into my blood at Sugar Sweet Sunshine, my favorite is still The Nog: pumpkin cake, egg nog pudding, and whipped cream. Each spoonful tastes like autumn. Autumn in the form of moist cake nuggets bound together by sweet dairy-based goo. It ain't a looker once it's smushed into a cup, but few things-smushed-into-cups are.

...Erm, I mean, Nog in a cup, you are the most beautiful thing-smushed-into-a-cup I have ever seen. Yes. Now hush. [rocks Nog to sleep]

: Mint Chocolate Chip Cookie Trifle

During one of my visits in May, I saw (and tried) for the first time the mint chocolate chip cookie trifle with vanilla pudding and whipped cream. Methinks I prefer a cake base over a cookie base due to cake's greater meldability with creamy things, but I still enjoy the cookie base because, you know, cookies are delicious. [triumphantly dusts off hands in celebration of a fully fleshed-out argument.]

: Chocolate Chip Cookie Trifle

There's also a lovely chocolate chip cookie trifle layered with butterscotch pudding and whipped cream.

: Strawberry Lemon Trifle

And the healthy-because-there's-fruit-in-it-by-the-way-I'm-not-a-nutritionist Strawberry Lemon Trifle made of lemon cake, strawberries, and whipped cream. This is what I get when I want a summery, slightly lighter punch of trifle.

: Banana pudding

Can't forget about the traditional banana pudding made of vanilla pudding, banana slices, and Nilla wafers. I usually forgo banana pudding in favor of something more unique/THE NOG, but you can't go wrong with this.

Another mainstay is the Chocolate Bomb trifle made with chocolate cake, chocolate pudding, and maybe something else chocolate, but after trying it once, I never felt compelled to get it again, although it was perfectly fine. Of course, if you love chocolate, you should go for it.

According to Sugar Sweet Sunshine's website, banana pudding and Chocolate Bomb are available all the time, while the others may be rotating/seasonal flavors. Having visited Sugar Sweet Sunshine three days ago, I can tell you the other flavors besides the mint chocolate chip (a flavor I've only seen once) are still there, plus a new one!: Coffee Puddin' made of coffee cupcake, pudding, and whipped cream. I can't say much about it since I only tasted a sample before going for a cup of The Nog. Maybe next time I'll try more.

I usually get two flavors in a "small" 10-ounce cup—a cup that'll only set you back $4—and share it with a friend. (There's a smaller four-ounce "shot" size that's great for one person.) The happiness-to-dollar ratio of a cup of Sugar Sweet Sunshine trifle beats the pants off every other around-$4-dessert in my book. Especially when a scoop of ice cream at Chinatown Ice Cream Factory costs $3.99...[emits angry-camel sound].

Sugar Sweet Sunshine
126 Rivington Street, New York, NY 10002 (map)
212-995-1960; sugarsweetsunshine.com‎