The Girl Who Ate Everything

Blogging about food and whatever since 2004.

the cupcakes of doom

There haven't been many updates lately (as in not one every waking moment of the day) because I've refrained from eating out or anything of much interest. I'm still working my way through the bag of dumplings I bought last week and I've been eating the dumplings for the past few days. They're yummy, it's nothing to complain about. I also haven't been doing much physical activity lately. As in...kind of no physical activity. Hm.

BUT THAT CHANGED TODAY! OH YES! Good NJ friend Cristen (although soon to be a permanent resident of Boston) visited me so we could go fooding. Diana and Ava came by too. Hung out in the dorm for a bit then went to Chinatown (where else?). See all the signs in Chinese and the absence of non-Chinese people? Yes, that's Chinatown. It just appears out of nowhere.

Rows of delicious pastries call out your wait, they're calling my name. And it's creepy. Pastries sound like possessed children.

We went to Fay Da Bakery where I had a bit of trouble deciding what wheat based product should go through the digestive process for the sole purpose of satisfying my gluttony. And the winner is...the lemon bun! I've never had a lemon bun before but was intrigued because instead of being 60-75 cents like most pastries, it was 95 cents! HOT DAMN! It must be good! And good it was, almost a cross between a bun and a croissant although more bun-like than croissant-like. It was slightly flaky on the outside but soft and doughy in the middle. The lemon filling had just a hint of lemon and wasn't very sweet, which was nice. I've had lemon bars that were so tart and sweet they made my throat close up.

How do they get the cupcakes to look so darm perfect and cute and THEY'RE LIKE BABY ANGELS MADE OF SUGAR!!!

We made our way up to Magnolia Bakery (if you know anything about Manhattan's geography you'll know that Greenwich Village isn't exactly next to Chinatown, but it's not that far. Or maybe the prospect of eating cupcakes made the distance seem like two feet) for cupcak-ing goodness. Are the cupcakes really as good as everyone says? I don't think so, and as much as Cristen loves them she acknowledged that she wouldn't wait in line to get them. I keep reading how it has long lines but JUST GO DURING A NON-BUSY TIME and there will be no line. Both times I've gone there has been no line. One time was fairly early (before noon), today we were there sometime after 5PM. Here are my steps to Magnola Bakery-ing:

  • Go in, oogle artificially colored pastel cupcakes
  • Decide whether you should stuff four cupcakes in a box since its capable of holding that many
  • Come to your senses and realize if you buy four cupcakes you will eat four cupcakes and ingest more sugar than the average Halloweener
  • Buy artificially colored pastel cupcakes
  • Leave giggling and guarding the cupcake box with your life

I found out that what I really like about the cupcakes is the icing. The cake goes well with the icing, not so much the other way around. I wouldn't be able to eat each part by itself but together they marry and have a lovingly close relationship, that is until I pulverize them with my teeth and mix them with my saliva (you could argue that by that point they're closer than ever...hell, they've become ONE). The icing is sickly sweet and the cake is just..cake. Not very sweet, but not unsweet either. Last time I got cupcakes from there I ate two without a problem but today I started feeling a bit woozy after one! I somehow made myself each the second in a slow painful manner (painful because I couldn't believe the cupcake lasted longer than a few seconds) so the lesson is for me to not buy more than one. Even thought the box holds four.

Not having been to an Italian restaurant in ages, I forgot about the BREAD! You'd be crazy to not like good bread paired with seasoned olive oil

While aalking around Little Italy Cristen and I looked at various menus to decide where to eat. We were also accosted by various waiters trying to persuade us to eat their pasta. If you ask me, sending out employees to attract customers drives customers away, but we actually did eat at a place that had a waiter outside chatting up potential customers. I don't remember the name (we were possibly on Mott St) but the food was very good. I had gnocchi for the first time, which I would describe as little soft chewy lumps of joy. That's how I describe food. Joy in lump formed. Oh, with pesto sauce. Lumpy joy in pesto sauce. [rubs belly]

I could eat a tub of gelato. Does it come in tubs?

After the dinner, which stuffed me to the point of waddling, we went to Ferrara. I had to try gelato, OKAY? Yeah, that's my excuse. I got pistachio flavor (my new favorite flavor) and Cristen got chocolate. It was good although I have to admit I couldn't tell the huge difference between gelato and ice cream. There is a difference, but it's not like the difference between sorbet and ice cream. I had heard many good things about gelato before, which led me to believe my mouth would experience some sort of orgasm, but it didn't. [sigh] Maybe I expected too much. It was good but I don't think I'd eat it again as it was something like $4 with the tip. Or maybe when I go to Italy some day I'll eat all their gelato. Bwahaaaaahahahaa.


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