The Girl Who Ate Everything

I visited Honolulu with Kathy from May 9-16. Yup, almost a month ago. You'll be reading about this trip for the next few months at the rate that I'm going. HOPE YOU'RE OKAY WITH THAT. If you missed it, read Part 1.

Waiola.

Aside from malasadas, the local food I most wanted to eat in Hawaii was shave ice. Yup. ...Frozen water. But frozen water so finely shaved that it looks like snow and fully soaks up whatever syrup it's doused in. We don't get that in New York City—among the few shaved ice desserts available here, most seem to consist of slovenly crushed ice, unappealingly chunky and crunchy, instead of gossamer-like shavings. This just wouldn't fly in Hawaii. Because crushed ice blows.

SHAVE ICE, COME TO MAMA.

Kathy brought me to Waiola, her favorite shave ice spot, where we shared a bowl of lilikoi (passion fruit) and li hing mui-flavored ice on top of custard (the flan-like sort) and mochi nubbins ($5). The first bite was a shock: It was smooth as Italian ice or sorbet, but fluffier and juicier, aka, unlike any other shaved ices I've ever had. Also unlike any other shaves ice I've had is that every bit of ice was saturated in syrup—no unsightly pockets of naked ice. As the bottom of of the bowl fills with melted syrup-soaked ice, you can slurp it up with the skinny straw (or you can just leave it and not ingest more sugar than necessary, but hey, the straw is there for a reason).

I visited Honolulu with Kathy from May 9-16. Yup, that was about a month ago. Thank god for digital photography or else I wouldn't remember enough to write about anything. ENJOY.

I got my malasada breakfast. I conquered a mountain of shave ice. The only major Hawaiian foodstuff left for me to gorge on? Plate lunch.

When I first heard of plate lunch—basically consisting of an Asian-influenced entrée, scoop of white rice, and scoop of macaroni salad—I thought, "That is what I want to eat every day." Okay, maybe not the mac salad as much (not that I'm against it; it's just not something I ever crave), but the Asian entrée? Yup. And the rice? Yes. A thousand times yes. Rice is my favorite starch. You know that moment when you open the lid of a rice cooker full of just-cooked rice and it releases a fresh poof of rice steam? I love that part—I take a giant whiff. And then relish my nutrient-barren rice.

The key to our plate lunch success was Stephanie Miwa. Stephanie is our friend Shannon's mom. Shannon wasn't actually in Hawaii—she's one of Kathy's roommates back in New York City and longtime friends from Honolulu—but Stephanie is so sweet that she didn't mind hanging out with us in her daughter's absence and being our tour guide for a few hours while driving us around the city.

Let the gorging begin.

Monarch Seafoods.

Our first stop, Monarch Seafoods, ended up being my favorite of the day. I wanted to try everything on the menu—ahi sashimi salad, spicy firecracker chicken, garlic butter sauteed tiger prawns, pan fried butterfish, and garlic roast pork, just to name a few options—but considering we had hours of eating ahead of us and limited space in our digestive systems, we started with a mixed plate of deep fried poke and mochiko chicken served with scoops of white rice and macaroni salad. Only $8.45 for this heaping pile of food.

I visited Honolulu with Kathy from May 9-16. Yup, that was about a month ago. Only three more days to recap!...which will probably take another month.

It's time for YUMMY.

To follow up the previous day's plate lunch gorge-a-thon, Kathy and I took it slow. Really slow.

After an Internet session at Barnes & Noble (thank you for your non-password protected wifi, B&N) at the Ala Moana Center, we went to the crowded food court to eat lunch at Yummy Korean B-B-Q.

I visited Honolulu with Kathy from May 9-16, which means I've been back in New York City for over a month. And these Hawaii posts aren't even done yet. Oh dear. I'll get back on the New York track in a month, maybe.

On the third day, I ate about 50 percent more than I should've. On the fourth day, I tried to compensate for the third day by eating less. And on the fifth day, I compensated for the fourth day by eating about 200 percent more than I should've.

This janky image is brought to you by Paint, which is turn in brought to you by me being at my mom's place in NJ and using her Photoshop-less laptop. For better Paint-y drawings and hilariousness, visit Hyperbole and a Half.

This math, it just doesn't work. But it's amazing how malleable the human stomach is when pummeled with a five-meal day.

Sconees.

Kathy and I started our day at Sconees, purveyor of scones and other baked sweets. Upon Kathy's recommendation, we skipped the scones and went for...

View PDX Serious Eats in a larger map

I probably should've mentioned this earlier, but I'm visiting Portland (Oregon) with Erin Zimmer this weekend for a Serious Eats-related trip from Wednesday night until Saturday night. The point of the trip: research the best food Portland has to offer for our upcoming Serious Eats book. And we will accomplish this by EATING AS MUCH GOOD FOOD AS WE CAN just shy of puking.

As our time is limited, we already have an impossibly long list of places to tackle (which I will share with those who are interested), so we're set on the food recommendation front. Maggie and her husband Matt are going to help us eat on Thursday and Friday, and my friend Rebecca is coming down from Seattle to eat with us on Saturday, but we could probably use more stomachs here and there. I'm not under the impression I have any readers in Portland (aside from the friend I already contacted; HI, EZRA!), but if I do...SPEAK NOW...and maybe we can get fatter together.

UPDATE: Thanks for raising your virtual hands, Portland eaters! I just popped in the handy dandy map Erin made. Look at all those blue markers...mmmyes....oh lord.

Some people have recommended pizza to us, but methinks we're not eating pizza because Adam has that covered. :) We chose places based on what we're covering in our book, which is breakfast, sandwich, dessert, and food cart-heavy