Although I'm not into alcoholic beverages, I will drink just about anything that doesn't contain alcohol at least once. If it doesn't sound too gross nor cost much nor pose an immediate threat to my health, at least.
While shopping at a bodega a block away from my apartment in search of Horlicks (they had it), I spotted a dusty can of Jamaican Irish Moss Peanut Drink. Never before had I consumed a beverage containing peanut butter and a seaweed-based gelling agent. Potentially tasty? Maybe. But it would only take a small investment to find out.
It poured out unsettlingly slowly, a bit thicker than crème anglaise. Not that I have anything against crème anglaise—I love it—it's just not something I would pour into a cup and drink. First thought: This is obviously not a thirst quencher. Second thought (mid-sip): Jesus christ, this is like drinking pudding. Like peanuty, not very sweet pudding. The substance appeared to be midway to something else—custard, sauce, bonding agent. What's it doing in a can?
I wouldn't say the drink is particularly bad. Or good. Or fulfills any craving for peanut, sweetness, or liquid. Maybe it would taste better as a hot, stomach-coating drink, like atol del elote. Or maybe it's unsalvageable. Does anyone out there have love for the gloopy peanut pseudo-liquid?
[I'm aware of Irish Moss's reputation as an aphrodisiac. Coupled with the name "Big Bamboo," this drink is a bit suggestive. But I'm almost 500% sure that it does nothing.]