roboppy.net

...and when I say "agreement", I mean something food related. This week has been hell, food-wise. To backtrack, yesterday I ate so much food I thought I was going to puke while the day before I stuffed myself with so much fruit that I thought I was going to explode in a shower of peach goo (ate something like 11 peaches, among other things). The day before I probably overate...something. If you've been reading my Livejournal (probably friends-protected entries, sorry) then you've read the never ending documentation of my whining and bitching. Wee!

I was planning to go to Minado on Friday as a treat for making it thoughout the week without killing myself, but I went yesterday instead. I weighed myself and found that I had indeed gained 10 pounds since starting to eat cooked food, but I thought it'd be worse so my family went out. I ate a lot. I don't really regret it...I think it was something I just had to get over with to decide was a bad idea. I went to Minado the first or second day on cooked food and it was fun. Now it's not so fun. I'm not even ...morbidly obese or sickly (well, I'll get to the sickly part soon) but I feel like I was a human being a few weeks ago and now I am a giant human-shaped waste-bin of crap. I don't mean to offend any fat people, but...my god, how do you feel? I mean, yesterday was the turning point for me. Ish. Not a full 360 and not because of the fat thing or else I would've stopped earlier, but because I realized why I did raw food in the first place.

My health apparently sucks compared to the average person. I am not the average person and I have to face that. The average person drinks soda, drinks coffee, eats ice cream, pizza, fries...I know not EVERYONE does that but you can't disagree with me here, eh? I eat fruit, veggies, pastries, and bread for a while, not bad quality, not really bad food, but I was hit with some scary-bad asthma and mucus-filled nose probablems last night. Now for those of you who have never had asthma (and I forgot I had it for the past two years or so), it sucks. That thing you like to do refered to as "breathing" becomes a bit of a chore and you wish you could stop, but if you stopped that would mean loss of bodily function and possibly a trip to the funeral home in the near future. As I would like to live for a little longer, perhaps until I get my first kiss by a member of the opposite sex that I'm not related to, I'm not willing to die anytime soon. My asthma has never been bad enough to kill me but I'm horrified and relieved at the same time that it came back so quickly.

My body sucks. But it's telling me to stop eating crap, or at least eat less of it. I ate less today than yesterday, but a horse could have accomplished the same feat (I wouldn't bet good money on it though). Now all I need to do is listen to what my body said and deal with it. What did I eat today? Unfortunately, not an optimum meal plan:

• 7 slices of bread (it's official: I cannot eat bread anymore. I finished the loaf I bought yesterday from the Korean supermarket (from a Japanese bakery). I must be eating it just cos I never ate it in the past. Even when I ate cooked food my family was never accustomed to keeping loaves of bread around; I was an English Muffin kind of gal. No bagels, muffins, donuts, or bread...just English Muffins for some reason.)
• a lot of cherries (and when I say a lot, I mean a lot.)
• 3 nectarines
• 2 mini red bean paste buns

It could've been worse. I mean, it's not even that bad, besides the 7 slices of bread, which didn't have very bad ingredients and was from an actual bakery (in addition to the mini red bean paste buns). At least it didn't have "WONDERBREAD" stamped on the bag, mmkay? Well! Anyway. I'm totally stuffed and got more of the asthma-ee feelings, so I think I need to cut out the bread at the very least. I still want to cling onto the desserts, unless I find out that my lungs have completely shut off, in which case I'd be willing to give them up. Am I allowed to have a vice? It's not like I do drugs or drink...I want my cakies! :(

Hey, I haven't had cookies since...well, it hasn't been that long I guess. But still! It's been a few days. Wee.

Something I want to get off my chest...I'm not talking to anyone in particular here (actually, this doesn't apply to most of you) but while I know my friends have the best intentions telling me that food is good and that it's not something to be afraid of (I agree with that), I personally cannot just eat anything I want. Because then I get that barrage of health problems I was blisfully unaware of during my raw food stint. Which was great. The social isolation was not so great, but the lungs and nose actually working bit was nice. So I know you're not trying to kill me when you say, "Robyn, you can eat that," because maybe I can't. Maybe my lungs will collapse. Not cool. Most people can eat whatever they want and not get weird health conditions but I'm not one of them and I have to face that. It sucks. And really, no one ever joke about getting me to smoke or drink because I think that would actually kill me. ;)

This morning I went to NYC with Cristen in the hopes of seeing The Boy From Oz or Avenue Q but they wree both sold out. Doooh! We entered a lottery for Avenue Q they hold for every show in which they give away 12 tickets for a discounted price, but we obviously didn't get that. Man, it's cutthroat getting Broadway tickets now. I haven't been to a show in a few years and it seems like they're a lot more expensive than before. I went to see Riverdance once, getting really cheap seats because I figured...why not (I've seen the show three times and sat in three different areas, hehe). I think the tickets were around $20 and while we sat in the back, we had a great view of everything. Money well spent, I think. Anyway, even Avenue Q, which as far as I could tell consists of lots of puppets (and their puppeteers and the orchestra) costs in the $90 range for nearly every seat. You can also get $40-something for the rear mezzaning, but who wants that? Makes going to concert seems less of an expense now.

I've been making lots of buttons with my button maker. WOO BUTTONS!