roboppy.net

You know you're going crazy when you start thinking in Japanese. It's not like I do it a lot (or ever) but after today's astronomy test from hell, all I could think was 「わるいです。」 Furthermore, I could also think 「とてもわるいです。」 Okay, what the heck am I saying? "Waruidesu" basically means "It's bad." At least I think it does. It's something like that. If not, then I don't have much to show for my semester of Japanese...

Actually, I've been getting really confused in Japanese class lately. The particles are really screwing me up and I keep forgetting how to make "te" forms out of "u" verbs. And then I forget what the whole point is. And then...and then...ARRGH ARGH! I'm really screwed for my final.

Actually (actually actually) I'm screwed for all my finals. My anthropology final is self-scheduled, and we were given a sheet of nine questions. Two will be on the final, and we get to choose one. I have no idea what to do for the questions, but I don't want to ask my teacher, "So, could you explain all the questions for me?" Oh well, even if I do really poorly on the final I'll still pass the course, at least. I think. Uh. Maybe I should think about that. I wish I at least knew some people in my anthropology class so we could discuss the questions, but I don't really know anyone. There is one girl that I've talked to, but I'd feel weird asking if we could study for the test. Mm. Well. I don't know.

Astronomy is, of course, almost pointless. I hardly know anything. Today's test was a bit of a disaster, especially when I barely had any idea what Jupiter was made of. There was a questions saying to list the most abundant element in the atmospheres of a bunch of different planets and I didn't even know what it was for EARTH. Actually, lemme look it up right now just to see how poorly I guessed...NITROGEN, YES! BWAHAHA! I got one question right. It counts for less than one point. Oh joy!

What have I been doing all week? Nothing very interesting, obviously. I only went to the gym on Monday, so I'm probably getting mushier now. I completely overate yesterday (on dried apricots...dried fruit is EVIL for me, noooo!) and got some terrible abdominal pains in addition to feeling like a beached whale. I really felt the effects of my eating after an astronomy study session my teacher held. I was walking back to the dorm with my friend, Liza, and my shoe became untied. I attempted to tie it, but my tummy hurt and I couldn't bend over well. In response to the pain, I started laughing, which created A NEW PAIN, which led to more laughing, and so on. Kind of like...a runaway greenhouse effect! Oh god, now I'm quoting junk from astronomy. This is bad. But basically, I was a laughing wreck doubled over in pain for a while. Fun, fun.

Besides the pain, I also had lots of gas. How could a human make so much gas? Both kinds! (If you want to stop reading right now, I don't blame you.) Today I fasted, keeping in mind the uncomfortable gas and such stuff that happened yesterday and hey, it's past midnight and I made it! Not that it's that hard. I once semi-fasted for six days, but I took some fiber-filled drink and some juice. Today I drank nothing, although I still had to pee a lot and poop (you're still reading this?), so I think fasting for a day or two is perfectly okay. Your body still has so much junk from the day before it wants to get rid of. You could fast for much longer than one or two days of course, but having the mindset to do that is different. I'd have to build up to it.

Today in English we had this insanely confusing discussion about poetry. Poetry, just sitting there by itself, is already confusing enough to me. Its presence makes my brain boil and seeeeeethe with fluids and bad things. So we were discussing that the point of poetry is not to convey a message but for the reader to have an experience. Reading the poem is the experience...in my case, the experience is almost always confusing and bad. Well, I'm kind of screwed for our final essay, which pretty much determines my grade for the semester. (sigh)

I guess I don't have to be TOO concerned about grades formy first semester of freshman year. Mm. Yeah.

Oh yeah, the rash I mentioned in the last entry seems to be bug-induced, i.e. many many tiny bug bites. That's what my mum said, at least. Now I am creeped out by the thought of sleeping in my bed at home. This has NEVER happened before. I have seven bites about my abdomen, three near my collarbone, and probably some more in other places. What the heck? (shudders)

Right now my my roommate and a bunch of other people around our floor are at the movies...they impulsively decided to go out. I guess that's okay, and it's probably a good thing to go off campus. This may be the first weekend since my first week here in August that I won't go off campus. I mean, where am I going to go? I feel like I have too much work to do to go anywhere, and even if I did want to go anywhere, it wouldn't be anywhere around here. I feel somewhat trapped. I don't even have my crocheting supplies...I didn't want to bring them because I figured it'd be a waste of time when I definitely have plenty of things I COULD do. But will I do them? Eh.

Last note...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DIANA!!!

[unrelated thing: In this article, the photo caption "click go the shears" is the name of a poem we read in my english class, which is about Australian literature...gee, I can already apply what I've learned to real-life! But in this case it's not that exciting. And this article is just a wee bit disturbing. But hey, that's New Zealand!...no, I don't have anything against NZ, heehee.]

I didn't know a buttload of snow was going to suddenly come down in ridiculously massive quantities until Saturday. And that was because I witnessed the gray haze of moving (horizontally) bits of snow outside my window (click here for some visuals). Needless to say, I stayed in my room all day. Then again, even if it didn't snow, I may have stayed inside all day anyway. Well, it was a good opportunity to fast.

I fasted for 48 hours. I don't know if I've fasted that long before, but I guess after you fast one time, the second time is easier. Today I probably ate too much, but I tried to chew much more slowly than before. If you're curious what a typical Robyn-day of eating is like, here's basically what I had:

3 oranges
2 persimmons
1 banana
35 almonds (a little more than an ounce, which is all you really need)
6 dried figs (mm...sugar)
lots of dried apricots (ie, more than 10, possibly much more)
a bit more than a liter of water (all my water bottles have a liter in them, which is how I know. Otherwise, I'd have no clue. How much water does one really need? Well if I didn't eat any dried stuff, I'd say that I didn't need to drink any at all.)

I doubt anyone who doesn't know me would be reading this, but if you don't, listing what I eat isn't really an obsessive thing. I used to do it on my raw food journal, which is now dead. I guess I could use this as a pseudo raw food journal, but I'd also put info about raw food and natural hygiene in the other journal. Annnd...I'm too lazy to do that now. WEE!

My stomach/digestive system feels pretty funky today. I don't have a stomach ache, but it's almost like...having bubbles popping inside of me? Like air is being moved around. I did eat last night, quite a lot of fruit actually, but maybe it's out of my system already. The thing is, as soon as I ate the dried stuff today, I could immediately feel the effects (ie, flatulence...it's a damn good thing my roommate isn't here right now). Crap, I'm sensitive. I can get fat in other ways by putting olive oil on things, but nuts are so much tastier. I really don't think it would make sense to eat for one day and then fast the next over and over again, but until I REALLY decrease the amount of food I eat (and face it, most people in this society excluding ANOREXICS eat way more than they have to) I don't think I could be comfortable eating two days in a row. Well. I say that now, after I ate dinner.

I feel okay. Pretty ...good-ish. I started getting some pimples, which (in my not very scientific view of things) means my body is getting rid of toxins and goo. I think the reason that teenagers are so prone to getting pimples is NOT the whole over production of oil, or whatever it is we learned in school, but that it could partially be due to teenagers' bodies being more capable to get rid of bad junk, unlike adults whose bodies have undergone much more wear and tear. It seems to make sense, kind of. But then not getting pimples could be a problem too, perhaps signifying that the body is incapable of getting rid of the junk, which in turn would just build up. Overall, having pimples is good if you look at them as a warning sign of health and don't just slather some medicated junk on them to get rid of them (which unfortunately seems to be the popular thing to do).

Eh, I don't really like getting into these health bits. I mean, I'm open to other people's ideas about health, but the thing is that I'VE PROBABLY HEARD IT ALREADY since I was brought up with the same conventional health ideas as most people. I don't believe every big of living foods health advice I hear, but some things make sense. And. I'm going to stop talking about health now. I'm certainly not the epitome of health. I'm still unable to do anything about the dark circles under my eyes; they're always there.

It'd probably help to get more sleep. Well, today I woke up at 8 AM because I could not, for the life of me, fall asleep. As much as I would have loved those extra two hours of sleep, I was totally awake. Eh well, tomorrow I'll probably be tired because of the heavy dried fruits and nuts I ate. Which is great since I DO actually have to wake up at 8. Damn, I get my Anthropology ethnography back tomorrow...screw me.

I've been spending way too much time drawing Poofy related things using paths in Photoshop. I didn't really know how to draw with paths before, but I've been using the vector shapes for ages. And then I figured it out...just make a new paths layer. Duh. Don't ask me why it took me so long to figure that out. Most of the things I learned about Photoshop are trial-and-error, which is why I don't know that much. Anyhoo, a Poofy t-shirt is probably in the works and may look something like this. The shirt can be a different color. Other ideas are this and this (and maybe even this. Other ideas are NOT this or this. Too much Poofy-ness.

Yesterday I went to the mall because I desperately needed something more suitable for the snow than the sneakers and sandals I already had. I got a nice pair of Sporto (sport-o! sounds Japanese) boots which would be great if my feet weren't so malformed. The tip of my feet is a bit squished, but the heel is too roomy, thus causing my boots to make a dragging sound when I walk. The next size was too large though; my feet probably would come out too easily. They're waterproof, cozy, and warm, so I guess my toes will just have to deal.

Another thing I wanted to do at the mall was get gifts for people. Well...that didn't pan out. I didn't have enough time because I'm very, very slow at finding boots. I'm not big on shoes and I'm annoyed that most women's boots have ridiculously high heels...DUDE, you're walking in snow and possibly ice, hoe impractical could that be? Of course, heels aren't for practicality. I've rarely worn high heels in my life and walking around on them feels very awkward. It's so unnatural. Of course, many things humans do are unnatural (as Rufus Wainwright said, cutting your grass is against nature) but some things, you know...you know...moo.

Okay, so even though I didn't get gifts, I did buy greeting cards and tissue paper in which I can wrap the invisible gifts. I also went to Delia's, which is...well...I guess I didn't like it before, but they have a lot of basic stuff and for some reason there's always a buttload of stuff on sale. I bought some cheap knee high socks (they really do keep your legs nice and warm, which is nice for those of us who don't seem to grow leg hair) and a skirt that is unfortunately too small, but it has an elastic band so I can fudge it. Or maybe I'll lose weight. There's always weight to lose...I'm very unmuscular. Need MUSCLE!

I can't say I'm very motivated to go to the gym now that there's loads of snow and my boots are only semi-comfy. I probably won't go. I may as well just rest and fast then. WEE! I think I just lost a lot of water I was retaining. There isn't much other reason for losing 6 pounds in a week. Maybe I drink too much water sometimes.

I hope no one thinks I'm being unhealthy...if you want to see unhealthy, talk to the other people in my dorm who eat ice cream in the middle of the night, take drugs for their colds/flus, sleep at weird times of the day, and so on. Okay, not a lot of people do that. I wish I could help my roommate with her health somehow, but she's one of those people that would never change because she likes regular food too much. Of course, I wouldn't want to push anything on her...she's a really nice person. And if she REALLY likes you, then she's mean. Anger = luv. It's fun. :)

Going back in time, on Saturday since I was in my room all the time, I worked on diskobox.net to give it a much needed makeover. It looked like crap before. SO MUCH CRAP. And I didn't really realize it until I went for my Media Cloisters interview. It looked embarassing, in my opinion. I also worked on my English essay, and I feel bad for Bill because it's very, very bad and he has to read it because he's my writing partner. Okay, technically he doesn't have to, but he will. And then my words will be so atrocious that all his bodily functions fail and tomorrow in English we will wonder where he is.

I really have to work on my astronomy homework now. I'm less confused after asking my teacher some questions about it, but I'm still confused enough to hate it. Joy!

If you're bored and have a lot of money, would you like to buy me something on my wishlist? No? I didn't think so. If YOU hav a wishlist, please tell me about it, or you won't get anything! :)

I should be studying...but I'm not. Hm. Well. Um.

I'm at home right now. I came back last night because I don't have any finals until Wednesday, but I have all this time to STUDY! But then I was thinking...well, what's the big point if I'm going to do poorly anyway? How much can I really cram into my head in the next few days? My anthropology essay is self-scheduled, which means I could have taken it starting Wednesday, but next Wednesday is the last day so I think I'll take it then. Wednesday, 1 PM, I'll be there with the rest of the unprepared people who waited until the last minute.

So yeah. I'm not in a very good mood. Finals suck. 2 hours of sitting there mooshing my brain...will suck. And I ate too much today so I don't feel that great. Eh. Well, that's my fault. For the past two days I've been eating less and feeling pretty good because then my digestive system doesn't feel like crap, but I kind of crapped that up today. I ought to go to Mexico like last year, where I could really only eat fresh fruits and veggies and it was great. Besides that, there was so much nice sunshine, as opposed to here where I am cold, cold, cold.

...okay, not that cold. The snow is melting, so it's not freezing anymore, but that's just kind of sad. Yesterday I woke up to see grass. NO WHERE DID THE SNOW GO? *sniff* Much sadness.

Today I woke up semi-early to go to Kinokuniya with my mum. I wanted to buy some cheap, kid's reading material to practice my Japanese and realized that books are very un-cheap...go straight for the old telephone book-sized comics! Erm, I mean manga! Er. Yeah. What's with these books? I never read this much when I was a kid. I don't know anyone who did. Maybe that's why I'm stupid. I mean, when I was little I probably read short picture books, not ginormous comic books featuring lots of young girls and boys with huge eyes making weird sound effects. I figured out the name of one of them is Lollipop, or Roripopu. Roripopu...that's a fun word. Anyway, I was kind of discouraged while I was reading because I could recognize some words, but I couldn't remember what they meant. Man, I'm screwed. I think I can pull a B in Japanese though.

ARGH IT'S JUST THE FIRST SEMESTER OF COLLEGE! I'm not going crazy. Mm.

After Kinokuniya we went to Whole Foods and I bought a squash. Well, there must have been some other stuff...oh yeah, carrots and tomatoes. I wanted the squach to make "spaghetti" and it worked out pretty well. It looked like saffron flavored rice noodles I once had, although it tasted like...squash. Not that there's anything bad with that. Squash kind of smells like melon, I found out. I've never had raw squash before. I found out I'm really bad at making sauce though. I didn't really follow a recipe, although I looked at one for some guidance. My sauce basically consisted of a tomato, some dates, some pine nuts, some olive oil, and some salt, "some" because I really had no idea how much to put in. It's not that the sauce tasted bad, but it didn't taste all that great either. Mmwell, I splooched that onto the "spaghetti" for some FUN YEAH and it's not like I usually eat like that.

I'm sure I wouldn't find this funny if I were Jewish, but I'm not. So I find it just a little funny because it doesn't seem real, but seeing that it is real, it's pretty disturbing. How could someone miss that? Yeah, I know it's a tiny, microscopic typo that only someone with...I don't know, VISION, could see, but really.

Damn, the Internet is going crappy again. This tends to happen when I turn my computer on.

I ate a few of Audrey's Pleasure Foods (Pleasure Foods?) today. They're basically raw, but some of them aren't totally raw. Maple syrup isn't raw, as far as I know. It's not a big deal, but I'm just bringing it up. Because.

These blog entries always come out jumbled and crappy. Of course, there's no reason for me to change that now. So. After talking about what I did today, what the heck did I do yesterday? I had a long study session with Sarah, a girl from my anthropology class, because I needed help, and she may have thought she needed help but I don't think I provided any. :( I guess I can provide reassurance...*sigh*. I wish I could be one of those people that didn't have to read everything to understand it, but I read everything and still don't understand it. So that wouldn't really work out. Anyway, as I was saying, we went off on a lot of tangents before coming back to reality; "So, on to question five..." She's really col, so I'm glad to have found someone in my class although we don't actually HAVE anymore classes. So. On second thought, it's depressing.

...which reminds me of something we talked about! No, it's not that depressing, although I happened to find the topic in I Hate This Place: The Pessimist's Guide to Life, which I saw at Borders today. While we were sitting in the Student Center, I heard someone say "Robyn!" Well, that can't be me because I'm unknown Robyn, not the other kind (you know...THAT kind...um, I'm not making sense). It ended up being Alison along with my roommate and another girl on our dorm's floor, saying hello fro the second floor (in the Student Center the second floor has a big hole in the middle that looks down on the first floor, which sounds weird when I say it that way but it's not). Duh. Silly me. Sarah said the same thing happens to her, and I guess a lot more people are named Sarah. In high school there was another girl named Robin who was completely different from me (ie, popular) so whenever people said that name I assumed it was for her. And then in those times people were calling for me, I felt bad for ignoring them.

Anyway, back to that book...on one page I happened to flip to it said something like "Whenever someone calls your name, you think it's for someone else." It was a funny book, I should get it. I'm more of a pessimist than an optimist, but I don't know if I'd call myself a pessimist. It's not like I wake up in the morning and think, "Dammit, I wish I were dead," I usually think "I want to sleep," which is what most normal, sleep-deprived humans think.

For some reason I'm listening to Coldplay's Parachutes now, which I haven't listened to in ages. This album is great, but it makes me imagine swimming in my own tears, or something equally bleak and (I can't think of another word, so forgive me when I say this) emo. I have to stop listening to this. Ergh! Oh yeah, Chris Martin got married? Hm. I hope he and Gwyneth Paltrow are happy.

I still can't imagine getting married. Are there really girls out there who imagine their wedding day since they were little kids? Isn't that a little creepy? I gues I wasn't one of those girls...not that I wasn't creepy. Well, I probably wasn't. Apparently, one of my friend's mums said I was "the cutest thing"...ahh! *buries head into hands* I mean, it's nice, but my mum wouldn't even say that about me. BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T LOVE ME HAHA! No, she loves me lots. :D

Is my brain melting? My god, I think it is! Huh! Uh! Chris Martin, it is NOT ALL YELLOW, ahaurieiei (switches to Mew)...mm, Mew. I like that name.

Today my mum went to the Palisades Mall to see the extended version of LOTR: The Two Towers. I thought I'd be lazy and do nothing, but I ended up going to the bank to deposit some checks I got from selling meal points (I found out I can't add correctly..."This is $204, not 214." Ack!) and then heading to Treasure Island and Borders where I didn't get anything, but saw a lot of things I COULD have gotten. I saw the Inside Bjork DVD for $10, which is a good price. I mean, as far as I know that's what the listing price should be, but it's a lot more expensive on amazon.com. I didn't want to spend lots of moolah though. I also went to the art section and drooled over various design books. What is with me? I'm not going to be a graphic designer, and I have no idea why I have so much interest in it. I looked through How to Understand and Use Design and Layout and now I want to buy it. Just because. I wonder what my life would be like if I had done art in high school instead of doing other crap. BUT I'LL NEVER KNOW, so yeah. I'm still thinking that I'd like to be an anthropology major, but overall, I'm basically screwed.

I've been saying that I'm screwed a lot lately. Huh. Well.

OH hey, please consider buying a Poofy t-shirt. I have a poll about shirt sizes here, and then I'll figure out what to buy and stuff.

No more finals. NO MORE! I thought this day would never come. After a week of unecessary freaking out and lack of sleep due to aforementioned freaking out, I am home and classwork-free!

So what has been going on this week? Well...I don't really remember. Hm. I think on Tuesday I tried to study for my anthropology test, which was rather pointless because, just my luck, the questions on it were ones I didn't know well. My teacher gave us a list of nine possible essay questions, two of which would be on the final, from which we would pick one. There was one question that completely confused me. In my mind, it didn't seem like a very good question so I figured "Oh, he won't ask this one." Well, it was no surprise then that he DID. I thought it was funny. Chuckle haha. The other question was one I didn't know very well either, but I managed to write an 800-word or so essay. I think I can get a B on it, which is good enough for me. Have low standards and you won't get disappointed.

I felt really awful the morning of the final (Wednesday), probably due to stress and fasting. My digestive system has been craptacular all week, although I think it's better now than last weekend when I was puking somewhat profusely. Lemme tell you kiddies: Puking is not fun. Actually, what's less fun than puking is WAITING to puke, huddled over the porcelain throne staring at the stagnant toilet water as you try to hawk up something but just get dry heaves or nothing at all. The puking itself is pretty bad too, but at least you know you'll feel better afterwards. Hopefully.

So back to what I was saying. Wednesday...oh yeah, that sucked. LIKE A VACUUM. (Why did I say that? Really...why?) The weather was dreary and resembled a level of hell (aka, it was cold and raining, which turned the snow into slushy goop). While I was walking to Blodgett Hall (one of the farthest classrooms from my dorm), I got a terrible ache in my abdomen. Could that be diarrhea? Why yes! Hey, we've all had it: no biggie. This was minutes before 9 AM when I was supposed to take my final though. Crap. I wasn't late for my final (it was self-scheduled) but I felt pretty awful. Thankfully, by the end of writing the essay, I felt better.

After my anthro final I studied for my Japanese final, which was at 5 PM until 7 PM. I think my Japanese final went okay...not that I got an A (that stopped happening early on in the semester, unfortunately), but maybe a B. Do I really have to get As anymore? I mean, I can't even get As anyway, so there isn't music point thinking about getting them.

Thursday I told myself I'd study for my astronomy test. And I did. Somewhat. Maybe. Not very well. In all honestly it wouldn't have mattered if I studied for 24 hours straight because I would have bombed the test anyway. I did a long study session with Liza (during which I drank tea...TEA, OH MY), which is what we usually do before astronomy tests to boost our confidence. I guess it did boost my confidence for the night, although I ended up not being able to sleep at all (I think I got two hours of sleep after attempting to fall asleep from 12-3 AM, getting up and going on the Internet for a while, going back to bed and falling asleep at around 5 AM). I think my inability to fall asleep was due to the excitement of getting to go home, the dreading of the astronomy final, and not eating very much food (however, I DID eat a lot of olive oil with nori).

And then came the test. The test to make me feel like I didn't actually attend any astronomy classes. I answered all the essay questions because my teacher stressed that he wouldbe giving partial credit, which I guess means he KNOWS most of us won't know what the hell we're talking about. I made up lots of stuff that is probably not right, but maybe I can get a tenth of a point for naming a body in the solar system. (sigh) It really was a disaster in my opinion (and Liza's) and I feel bad for my teacher because he has to grade my sucky-ass test. He's a nice guy, I just couldn't learn much.

I came home today (technically yesterday) after the test and thought "YES it's so good to be home!" Until I realized how annoying my dad is. Very, very annoying. So annoying that I want to go back to school. I can't explain it, but for some reason his brain just doesn't work correctly. He asks questions no one can answer, and for ones that mayve can be answered, he asks the wrong people. It's like he has some form of alztheimer's disease, but not really. I can't stand living with him, and I really have no idea why he comes back. For such a cheap person, he sure buys plane tickets to and from Taiwan frequently. Couldn't he save something like $5000 a year if he just stayed in one place? Anyway, I guess there isn't much point talking about how frustrated I get with him because it really doesn't make sense. He'll ask you questions, but not listen to your answers. He'll make up the answers that he wants to hear and forget you said anything.

So to get out of the house I went to see LOTR: The Return of the King with my mum. There were lots of previews, of which the Harry Potter trailer was the most interesting to me. I think that movie is going to be awesome, but those kids already look pretty old. Especially Draco Malfoy...ack! Oh well, it'll still be a cool movie. Anyway! I really liked the movie, but I can understand what I've heard about it not being as good as the second, or people liking the second one more in general. The fighting scenes are really good (Helm's Deep was nothing, apparently) and I like getting to see Frodo and Sam's journey more. There were lots of special effects that felt kind of tired after a while, but they were good effects. The spider was really freaky...jesus, I wonder what it took to shoot those scenes. I guess I'll find out in the SPECIAL EDITION DVD. I was most confused by Denethor's character because the movie doesn't really mention why he's...you know, CRAZY. I had to ask my mum about that after the movie since she listened to the books on tape. I really liked Pippin's role in this movie (here's my new desktop...okay, I think he's really cute). For most of the movie, everything felt hopeless and ...wait, do you guys know the story? I guess I shouldn't be giving anything away. I knew the ending of the book because I asked my mum, but...well, you know everything is happy in the end. Insanely happy. I wanted to cry. Dammit, I hate when movies do that to me (which is probably why I'm not a movie person. I don't like having my emotions stirred up!). Now I'm thinking of finally reading the LOTR. ...by listening to them on tape. Mwahaha.

Damn, I'm tired. Need more sleep.

As you can see from my title, I had the most thrilling holiday ever. Kind of. Maybe. Not really at all, but maybe if you squint...

My holiday was okay, although obviously not much worth talking about or else I would have updated this thing sooner. I mean, it's 4:30 AM right now, what am I doing? I took a nap today and now my sleep cycle is a bit off. Today I woke up late, ate a late lunch, took a nap, woke up and ate a really late dinner, wrote some letters, sewed some Poofies, and...now I'm here. Hm.

Yesterday (well, two days ago) for Christmas we had an old family friend over and at the last minute, two of my cousins and one of cousin's husband. I guess it was nice to have a lot of people over for the holiday who weren't annoying (on Christmas Eve we had my mum's aunt and her husband over, but she doesn't like them very much). My mum had to cook a lot more stuff than originally planned though, and I'm glad she got to relax today. I don't understand how my dad can just invite over whoever he wants and not actually do anything to help prepare for the dinner and things like that. I mean, he really does nothing. My mum had a bagillion dishes to clean. And even stupider (maybe) is that he asked my mum to invite over another family we're friends with on Sunday. Because Sunday is that special December 28th holiday! Erm. No. There's no point, and my mum JUST finished destressing from the past few days of having to entertain. We might invite them over for New Years Eve, but I'd rather not have to get together with people, even though I like the other family. It just seems really stupid that my dad can do whatever he wants but not actually have to do any of the dirty work. Actually, I don't really like my dad so I'd probablhy criticise anything he does...and I know he's not a bad person, but there's nothing very likeable about him.

I'm getting pretty attached to cheese. I've never sought good cheese until now (as opposed to when I ate mainly cooked food and ate weird mozzerella sticks and cheese singles...okay, those things are definitely NOT cheese, and I would question their digestibility). Manchego is especially yummy in my opinion; it's not too salty, but has enough that there's some flavor, and it's a bit chewy and hard but not too chewy and not so dry that it crumbles. I had a very tiny goat cheese that my mum bought and it was really dry. It seems like goat cheese isn't as chewy as sheep or cow cheeses. My mum and I had this other goat cheese that was really fresh, but was more like a block of cream cheese than a regular harder kind of cheese. Also, it barely tasted like anything, which isn't a bad thing, but it was coated with a bunch of herbs that tasted funky. ...anyway, CHEESE! MM! If you buy cheese, get the good stuff.

...man, did I just write that much about cheese? Eek. Well. I ran out, so I didn't eat any today. I've been eating a lot of butter lately, just for the heck of it. Why not, I never ate that much butter before. Nope, it's not raw...can't find raw butter. :( What is butter good for? Fat, pretty much. FAT IS GOOD! As long as it's good fat. I'm not really low on fat in general, but I'm having some weird circulation problems (I don't know if that's even related). Sometimes my toes and fingers are ice cold, and it feels pretty weird sometimes. My mum is much warmer than I am. :( And it seems like the more I use my fingers (like now when I'm typing), the colder they get. Is that supposed to happen? Oh well, if I keep everything in perspective, cold hands and feet are much easier to deal with than not being able to breathe through my nose and having asthma.

My cousins really liked my Poofies (maybe I should add that they're both females in their late 20s)! I had a bunch of extra ones and it took me a while to realize that I should give them each one for Christmas. I still have two big Poofies left that I guess no one wants...*sob*...so maybe I'll sell them through cut + paste. My cousins also picked some buttons and gave me $5...aw. That was nice. Today I got my Poofy stickers and they're great! They're printed on vinyl, so they should last a while. And speaking of Poofy, I just updated the comics with some that I did while I was in school. Oooh!

Lately I've been making lots of skirts. I've grown fond of skirts lately because wearing them makes me feel like whale-like than when I wear pants. DOWN WITH PANTS! I still like pants though. Anyway, I've never really worns skirts until this year, which is weird...maybe. I would never be caught DEAD in a skirt in high school, don't ask me why. It would have been very un-Robyn-like. But now I wear skirts without really thinking about it. And I can wear fun stripey socks with it. SOCKS! YES, SOCKS ARE GREAT! But you knew that already.

Well, I can't think of anything else to say now. Sad that just about nothing has happened in this past week, eh? I still haven't seen Return of the King for a second time...must...do...that! AND THEN I CAN SEE PIPPIN! HAHHAHAHEHEHA! Uh. No, I'm not scary at all...

Today I'm planning to finish up a few Poofies. Last night I sewed a bunch of them while watching the Michel Gondry DVD and the extended version of The Two Towers. I dont usually watch a lot of DVDs, but sitting around and making Poofies can get a little dull. I really liked the Michel Gondry DVD; he's a strange dude. Well...okay, not really. Kind of insecure and worries about being murdered en route to faxing music video ideas to Bjork. The David-Cross-as-a-turd movie was pretty entertaining, although I'd be a little more scared than Michel was if my turd came to life and ran down the street screaming at me. Of course, TTT rules, and while I can see how some of the scenes weren't necessary, other scenes definitely would have been helpful. Did the original version talk about how old Aragorn was? I remember that my mum told me about that. Also, I think the flashback scene with Faramir would have been nice to see before I saw ROTK. I'm not totally through with the second disc yet, but I have all night to make Poofies...

So not much has been going on. Not much goes on in general. I know health-wise I could be much worse (lying in a hospital bed with tubes sticking out of every orifice comes to mind) but I've been feeling pretty crappy lately just from being all...fat. Or bloated. Bloated is probably the word. It makes me think of toads or that fish from Finding Nemo. ...if you can't tell already, my brain is melting. Yes. I loved Finding Nemo...

...okay, back on track. Actually, there was no track to begin with. Is this how I'm spending my last moments in 2003? Crap. Well then, tonight some family friends came over for dinner and it was nice, except they came an hour later than usual which mean I ate an hour later than what was planned, which means ...BLOATIE! Maybe I should change my name to Bloatie.

I was trying to think of the best album of 2003, but I couldn't think of much. I guess I didn't buy that many albums that were released this year. At the top of my list I put On Your Side and Frengers, and then I realized that neither of these albums were released in the US. Do I need to move to the UK? I'll probably never even go there. [sidenote: What is that smell? It's bothering me.]

On Monday I went to Best Buy and Tower Records to look for the re-release of Sea Change on DVD, but I could't find it. :( At Best Buy I bought the Michel Gondry DVD and Make Up the Breakdown. And then...I saw this. Just a few days ago I was saying how I wouldn't see the point of buying any TV show on DVD except for Sailor Moon because I couldn't actually watch it on TV. I had absolutely no idea that there was so much stuff on DVD. And now I'm going to become poor as I try to make $200 appear out of somewhere so I can buy the first two seasons...

Maybe I should talk about just how much of a Sailor Moon freak I was. (Or maybe not, so I will appear more sane...eh, you probably think I'm insane already.) I started to get into Sailor Moon during my visits to Taiwan when I was in elementary school. I really don't know how, but I guess I just liked the way it looked because I sure as hell couldn't understand any of it. I even bought some videos that were in Chinese (I'm guessing...eh, some Asian language) and I bought the entire set of the comics (not the original ones, the ones based on the TV show) that was in Chinese. My mum actually had to order them for me from a local comic book store, and I made my mum read all of them to me (man, how could she stand that?) at various times, or so I assume, unless she could read them all to me during the plane ride between Taiwan and New Jersey. I also have the set of comics for Sailor Moon R, but it's in Japanese...not sure where/when I got that. The peak of my obsession was probably when I was 10 years old in 5th grade...I drew Sailor Moon stuff all the time (badly, although I did a lot of tracing too) and one of my favorite toys was this golden Sailor Moon locket. I think I actually wore it too, which I'm hoping was acceptable when I was 10. I can't believe I don't have it anymore (WHY WOULD I THROW THAT OUT?) but no, I am NOT going to bid on it or buy it now. ...*sob* Maybe if it ever becomes insanely cheap.

Erm, anyway! I guess I didn't buy THAT many toys based on Sailor Moon (never had any of the dolls/action figures at least, but then they didn't look that good. I'm talking about the Japanese toys here; the American dolls were absolutely horrendous. I did buy this wand though...$40?! Maybe $13.) besides some little figures which I recall covering in silly putty-like matter and then having them try to escape from the goo (oh god, I was weird). I remember having a Sailor Mercury keychain that I used as a good luck charm. The only things I have left are lots and lots of trading cards. I don't even remember buying them, at least not the number that I have now (I didn't count, but it's more than 2). I remember that there may have been a card machine near that comic book store in Taiwan, but I don't think I loaded up on them that way. I DO remember that there was a machine at Toys R Us which dispensed the American cards...and those sucked. I was reading them and they're just so stupid! Then again, the Japanese ones might be stupid too, but I can't read them. It doesn't look like trading cards do well on eBay, or else I'd have loads to sell. I don't know how many are in the entire set, but the highest numbers I have are in the 500s. There must be some crazy people out there with the entire set.

I was pretty obsessed with Sailor Moon despite the lack of its presence in the USA (and my not being able to read the comics or watch the show) but then Mixx magazine came out (now Tokyo Pop). I first saw it at Electronics Boutique and I jumped out of my skin. And then I put it back on and bought the magazine. Actually, it was more like one of those huge Japanese manga things with the newspaper-ish pages in different colors than a magazine, but then it later became glossy with less emphasis on comics and more on culture, which made it suck to me because I just wanted to read comics (for a good Asian culture magazine, read Giant Robot). The magazine got me into Parasyte, which is nothing like Sailor Moon, but it's really funny sometimes. It's being made into a movie that seems like it'll never be released.

Of course, the TV show also ended up being dubbed and put on TV. 6:30 AM IS NOT A GOOD TIME TO PUT ON A NEW TV SHOW! Well, those WB folks probably knew that. I actually woke up at 6:30 AM to watch the show. I moved a little TV into my room so I could wake up (half-conscious), soak in the TV rays for half an hour, and go back to sleep (school started at 9 AM). Once I vividly remember not even paying attention tothe TV, but just leaving it on while I half-slept and then turning it off once the show was over. I have to admit, the show isn't even that well done (and the dubbed version is worse than the Japanese one) and the storyline is extremely predictable, yet I was that obsessed with it. During the summer I had tennis lessons in the morning so I'd record the show on video (I had the entire first season recorded, but I must have thrown out the videos). I brought a small TV with me to the airport once because the show was playing while we were waiting to check in our bags. The episode that was playing was the last one of the season and I was really sad because the little TV sucked. (Those mini-TVs never really work, do they?) Then again, it doesn't matter that much because I found out that in the dubbed version the last two episodes were combined which failed to show how ALL THE SAILORS DIE. I'd think that's pretty important, but maybe it's too much for American viewers? Uh. (Most of the stuff that was cut was thought to be too violent or sexual, and I'm having trouble imagining how some of the characters I thought were female were actually male.)

I'm not sure when my obsession died down, but thank god it did. Sometime during high school the Sailor Moon movies were released on video and my mum bought those for me. I watched two of them and they didn't make much sense to me since I didn't watch the episodes. So I have to catch up! NEED DVDS! My brother has bought a lot of TV show DVDs (Futurama, Family Guy, The Simpsons...) and I never have, but I feel like I should try to make some money and use that to buy the DVDs. The only way for me to make money (besides getting a real job...haha) is to sell Poofies, and at some point, Poofy t-shirts (but I won't actually make that much money from the t-shirts considering it'll cost me around $300 to have them made). Eh well, I'll figure it out. It's that important to me.

...man, I need to get a real life. I'd like to believe that I'm doing better than my brother, at least. He's not a bad person or anything, but he seems to spend his time unwisely. He plays games...a lot. Right now he's at a friend's house playing games. He's never had a job and he's not planning to go to graduate school (he's a senior right now) but since he's majoring in economics and minoring in political science, he should be able to find a job.

I still have no freakin' clue as to what I should major in. (sigh)

I can't believe I wrote that much about Sailor Moon. Did you read all that? I wouldn't have.

TIME FOR POOFIES!